Reviews for Corazón Roto A Hollow's Story
The Anguished One chapter 16 . 5/27/2014
A beautiful ending to a fantastic story. Thank you for writing this. Akihiko's journey was a wonderful read.
The Anguished One chapter 14 . 5/27/2014
Akihiko's interactions with Ivan are fascinating. It would seem Aki's love did rub off on Ivan though. How fun.
The Anguished One chapter 11 . 5/27/2014
A trip to the Soul Society to see his girl. How romantic. I hope Aki manages to evolve again. I'd love to see what his sword can do.
The Anguished One chapter 8 . 5/27/2014
Love vs hate... interesting. I like your view on how the hollows fight for dominance in the Menos.
The Anguished One chapter 3 . 5/26/2014
Akihiko's power is very interesting, and I look forward to seeing it evolve with him, but I have to ask: Why did he immediately become a hallow? Was it becase of his desperation?
The Anguished One chapter 1 . 5/26/2014
Cool start. Sadly, I forsee nothing good in Akihiko's near future.
Wrathanet chapter 16 . 10/26/2013
Well, I suppose I shouldn't be surprised at the tragic ending. Hollows are tragedy walking around on varying numbers of feet. The fact that everything about the story was set up to follow that tragic format just made it even more inevitable (which, in a really weird way, added to the tragedy. We knew he couldn't win).

I don't think your ending was a cop-out. If anything, it gives Ayane some well-deserved character development. In fact, all of your characters are brilliantly tragic, even Faust in a way (mostly in how he truly lived up to his name - making a deal to gain more power with something that would inevitably turn on him).

It was a shortie, but a goodie, and an excellent exploration of the life of a Hollow (even more than what the anime gave us).

One thing though: if you're going to leave an author's note, please separate it from your story text. It's kind of jarring to be reading a story one moment, and a short memoir on your writing process the next. I'm not saying get rid of the note (if anything, I think it's an excellent note to end on - heheh, puns), just add a few more line breaks or some hyphens

Anyway, thanks for the story. I'll definitely check out any other work you've put out there.
Wrathanet chapter 14 . 10/26/2013
I can't believe I'm glad to see Ivan here, but I was grinning like a lunatic at the end of this chapter. Can't wait to see Faust get his ass handed to him
Wrathanet chapter 11 . 10/26/2013
Very satisfying "Oh Crap" moment from Ivan there.

The descriptions are getting more and more vague, here. I can understand that it might be tedious to describe what the same guy looks like over and over again as he changes, but I personally prefer just a little more detail.
Wrathanet chapter 7 . 10/26/2013
I have to say, writing a character as part of a gestalt consciousness of hundreds of individuals is no easy undertaking, but you pulled it off quite well.
Wrathanet chapter 5 . 10/26/2013
Interestingly enough, Faust is the one tempting someone this time around!
Or, something close to it. Again, you've introduced another fascinating character just to take him away! I wonder how long you'll be able to keep this up.

I hope that when Faust said he was a Vasto Lorde, you meant that that's what he was before he evolved into an arrancar. Because Vasto Lordes don't carry a sword, and don't look entirely human.

Sorry, just a little Bleach nerd-rant there.
Wrathanet chapter 4 . 10/26/2013
And here you go, explaining exactly why most hollows act like animals - to fuel their hunger - right after I asked!

You seem to have a knack for writing nasty characters as well as sympathetic ones. Already, you've invented and killed off two entertaining villains! And I get the feeling that Faust will be even better (I like the name you chose, by the way)

The only complaint I have is that the whole "remains of the jaw of their mask" is a bit overdone for arrancars.
Guest chapter 3 . 10/26/2013
Fantastic characterization here. I was waiting to see what you would make Aki look like, and the description did not disappoint. It's interesting how he's already showing the traits of a high-class hollow, with his asymmetrical hole (which, by the way, was revealed beautifully).

I almost have to wonder why more hollows aren't like this: driven by pain and confusion left over from their old life. Instead, they're either portrayed as ravenous animals (which kind of presents a pessimistic view of the spirit of the human race), or cartoonishly evil. It's good to have those kinds of opponents like those, and it's satisfying to see them defeated, but does a character always have to look like a human to have a personality?

I almost wish you had incorporated his color scheme into his fighting style. Blue and white flames would not only be interesting and unconventional for a hollow, but it would suit Aki more.
FollieOfMadness chapter 16 . 6/16/2013
You know what? Ignore all my previous threats. Ignore everything I've said before.
Because now I'm not going to shiv you or shoot you or break into your home.

But aside from my truthful death threat, good story. For what it was, it was good. A story about an OC (technically two, but eh.) becoming a Hollow. It was touching, sad, and hopeful. It, was awesome.
You earn twelve badassery stars out of eleven mi amir.

FollieOfMadness chapter 15 . 6/16/2013
...You know, locking your doors isn't going to help now. So, why don't cha JUST STAB YOURSELF AND SAVE ME THE FUCKING EFFORT! YOU ASSHOLE! YOU KILLED MY AKI-KUN! HYAAAAAAAAAH! *Ninja leaps through internet and kicks your face off*
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