Nice story. Really like the plot and i actually enjoy long chapters. Update soon.

~Rife

great story, hope you continue

Not a bad start, few parts were a bit too sappy and also the relationship a bit hurried, but overall vgj and I hope to see more soon.

P.S.: Even though long chapters are usually better (less inconsistencies and happier readers), 22k is a bit too much, 5 - 10k often works. That way one can more easilly interrupt reading after a shorter chapter and go back to it later without needing to search through half the text of a long chapter where did he stopped reading.

OK...Brilliant, absolutely brilliant. The first chapter actually kept me riveted in place, as i didn't want to look away. it has an unusual pace to it that makes it appealing. Definitely interesting in the manner that you bonded Harry and Hermione, and also that you killed the dragon - makes Harry understand the value of pain and life/living.

Dumbledore seems off his rocker - as usual. It seems that he doesn't want harry to learn how to kill, or not even kill which is pretty stupid if he has to end up killing Voldie.

Another thing, i hope that you tech Ron a lesson after his attempt at hitting Hermione. Punish him badly.

Lastly, some scene breakers would have been nice, although they may break up the flow of the story, they do add to the flow at the same time.

Phoenix5...

A most excellent beginning piece!

Whilst I feel you brought the bond on too soon, you did it in such a way that made it seem...good.

The dragon fight was interesting, and definitely the characterisation of Harry when he slew it really worked wonders.

Good to see you hate Ron! Nice work at the end there!

Keep it up.

Regards

SA

absolutely fantastic! i've been waiting for another good GoF rewrite and this one is great so far! i love the ideas you've come up with and i'm really looking forward to your next update! absolutely brilliant!

WOAH! This is bloody awesome! I LOVE how Harry and Hermione have bonded! And the mirrors are great! And I LOVE how the Grangers got rid of the Dursleys lickidy-split! POST MORE ASAP!

What will they think when they all find out that Harry and Hermione are literally married by Old Magic? Especially the Weasleys? POST MORE ASAP! And what will Sirius and Remus find out about Harry's placement and money?

POST MORE ASAP!

Love ya,

Sam

The start to this story was wonderful and well written. I only noticed a few typos and places where a break between scenes would have been nice.

I am looking forward to how you will continue this! :)

Oh yes.. very good. Very good indeed!

Finally someone setting "Bilius" in his place. It's an unspoken rule _never_ to hit girls/women after all, what's wrong with Molly & Arthur anyway? This is after all something most of us can see "Bilius" doing without thought, so did they teach their children anything at all? *sighs*

Really love the story so far (even if the whole Harry getting together with Hermoine was a bit fast, but frankly people get together really quickly all the time, so it's still realistic)

Really looking forward to more

This is a amaxing fic, and at 20,0 words, this has to be the first chapter I read beginning of a story that had such a long length and fast pace.

First I would thank you for making this a hermione/Harry story, I always imagined that hermione looked like emma watson who is very beutiful, they are made for each other, she was always there for harry, even when ron abandoned him 2 times, even when the wizardy world ostraized him, they are perfect for each other. I can't even imagine how stalker ginny hooked up with him, 1 shes looks like his freaking mother, 2 she only likes him as the BWL, and 3, everytime JK mentions her, shes always surrounded by friends, popular, a blood mary sue she is. And just because potter men have a thing for red hair, that does not mean harry hooks up with her. I will never understand how lazzy ass ron hooks up with ron.

I love the fast pace of the story. You writtern accordingly to the canon, I always imagined canon harry will be like your harry, instead of moping around, getting insulted by ron, toher people, he shoudl have started to train.

I hate ron, and judging from the last sceen, this has to be end of thier friendship, because whether ron knows or not, know one hits Harry Wife, Hermione Potter. I love how ron got whopped in the end, Im not surprised ron would physically lash out, becuase he has a temper that he cant control. And good he got caught out in the end, I forgot he knew about the dragons, he didnt tell harry so Harry makes a fool out of himslef, so ron ego will take a boost from that. Im surprised that stalker ginny has made claims on Harry yet, I would have expected to see her lash out at hermione but Hermione can handle, she isnt the smartest and powerful rich of her generation for nothing.

I'm glad that Hermione parents were able to help Harry and claim gaurdianship over him, so they can take care of him and pretect him. Also with Sirus, and remus with Harry, Harry will be fine living with the Grangers, do they have thier home under the fidulus charms and is sirus living with them?

Its also good that Harry has Dobby, Winky, sirus, remus and hermione helping him with the tournament, in know time Harry will be able to defend himslef against future death eaters and why may late in way at the tri-wizard tournament.

I also like how Nerville punched ron, and stood up for him, frankly nerville is much better friend than Harry, in the canon, Nerville belived Harry, went to the minstry to save sirus, and even try to rally support for him in Hogwarts 7 year, at the risk of his life. I hope Harry finds a better frinds in Nerville than ron. And with Harry with him, Nerville confidence should boost.

Dumbldore I belive is manipulative, not evil but a manipulative bastard. He cares about Harry but he cares more for the greater good than harry happiness, surely he must have realised something wrong when harry hogwarts letters were addressed under the stairs, frankly the old fossil has lost sight of whats good for harry and is molding harry into a weapon. But looking forward when Harry gives the finger to Dumbledore, and now Mcgongall is losing faith in him so Harry should have some suport from his head of house

This is a realistic sotry that is good as the canon, I hope you don't lose sight in the story and give harry godly powers or money, or hiers stuff. You story isnt cliched which draws me to your story.

Im looking forward seeing the consequence of Harry snapping rons wand, I think that it felt good for Harry to do that, but Harry can obviously afford 5-10 galleons for a wand as his cost 7 so he can obviously over the cost, but harry wont care, he got the satifaction of snapping his wand. I also look forward seeing hwo the weasly will take rons betrayal and almost hitting ron, hmm.. molly wont be pleased to see her son about to hit a women, something she didn't teach him.

Im also looking forward seeing will Harry take action against Rita, becuase in the muggle world, what rita does is slander, Im sure people must know luscious is a DE, but they dont speak out or in the papers, so somethinf prevents them doind that, and Harry is the BWL, surely he has influences to stop that, maybe he shouuld get in contact with some layers and file law suit againsst rita. Rita is dangerious in her animigus form, she can spy on them and reveal everything so nay plans they made will go to waste, Harry will need to sort that out.

Anyway, I think thats enough for a review, a bit long, lol. Anyway looking forward to the next chapter. Great start.

5/5

_

Excellent start, especially the bit at the end with Ron. I hate the guy. Harry's proposal to Hermione seems a bit early in the story though.

WOW! This is possibly the best Harry Potter story I have ever read. I have always felt Ron's and for that matter Dumbledore's jealousy hindered Harry's growth. Keep up the good work and update often.

Fantastic beginning. I can't wait to see what happens as a result of Harry snapping Ron's wand.

I love it !

manipulative, idiot Dumbledore, moronic Ron, treacherous students, fantastic house elves, magical bond.

What more can anyone hope for?

MORE PLEASE!

MORE !

what did it mean for another student to snap a wand ?

what will molly's reaction be toward it, and when ron try to slap hermione, and not telling harry about the dragons?

what about harry's new power level ?

please do not take too long in updating