Reviews for After the Vault
Loco15 chapter 18 . 4/29
Good story.

It's not very often that I get to read how a normal person reacts to basically being thrown, fly or die style, into a world that might as well be hell for them.

And by that I mean mental breakdown, trauma, unhealthy coping mechanism (drugs and desperately clinging to someone and seeking approval) and what happens when those coping mechanism somehow make things worse.

But holy hell, was she a whiny, emotional wreck of a dependant bitch. I mean, it's not like I can confidently say I could do better, but damn was she hard to like sometimes.

Also, your efforts to make the story dark and gritty fall short, because the only permanent consequences only ever happen to secondary characters, often ones we barely know anything about and were just introduced in that same chapter.

It's really hard to immerse myself into the story and feel any tension when I know any character I know and could care about is being protected by plot armor from any lasting, grievous consequences, up to and including; dead, amputation, disability, or any other event that has drastics effects on that characters life and personality /way of life, most likely permanently and with ramifications that are not ignored or brushed over on the next chapter.

I had hoped Sharn actually died from that rocket, or otherwise suffered somekind of permanent, unrecoverable injury, not because I hated her, but because the only way the severety of the event could allow her to come out virtually unscathed is because of plot armor.

Otherwise, good fict. I couldn't help but feel quite detached towards the end, but at least it seems like Abigail is finally sorting herself out for good, because I was starting to get really tired of her shit. I think I feel more empathy for Chopper and Kyle than her.
Guest chapter 1 . 1/21
marmite and jelly chapter 18 . 1/23/2019
I really enjoyed your tale. Thank you for the diversion.
jadefire starlight chapter 1 . 9/7/2018
Really love how you brought the experience of the vault and the horrors of an attack and having to leave it would be. Thank you for sharing this WONDERFULLY Written Story.
DBac47 chapter 7 . 11/12/2016
Outstanding! Greatest Fallout fanfic I have read to date. You capture the essence of fallout better than the game themselves. Absolutely fantastic!
Guest chapter 8 . 1/7/2016
Meh. I'm leaving the story disappointed at this chapter. I feel like I have wasted my time. The worst problem with this story is none of the characters apart from Abby are remotely likeable. The story drags on with too much telling and not enough showing. I couldn't care less whom she decides to hook up with out of your characters. 'Chopper' is made to sound like an ugly, withered, kinda fat and saggy, old sociopath. Or you have Sharn with the unexplained nickname Sia, an amoral murderer, homophobic slut.

Perhaps I missed the great reveal of a better love interest by leaving at chapter 7/18, but I guess I will never know. My interest, that was maintained on life support for a few chapters, has now lost the will to live and flatlined.

In terms of writing, for the most part you write quite well. I would be cautious however in that it seems parts of explanatory text go missing. We get to conclusions or 'she understood' without understanding ourselves...

Anyway, make of it what you will!
TeganCappa chapter 9 . 1/4/2016
I think this would be better with less romance and more plot. It feels plastered on and they seem to just wander around from place to place with no goal in mind.
OllyOllyOxycodone chapter 7 . 1/4/2016
The story would be MUCH better without the lesbian drama boohoo every chapter. I have nothing against it, but it is just so out of place in this type of setting.
Karharot chapter 18 . 10/4/2015
A really good and enjoyable story well worth reading. Characters have depth and their own individual personalities while the plot and the setting fit well into the larger world of Fallout.
If there is ever any sequel to this I will certainly want to read it :)
awolfofredmoon chapter 8 . 9/22/2014
i love it most people use the same places and people from a cannon and try to twist it to make a story you on the other hand just took the world of fallout and ask whats happening over there where no one has looked before and made it your own

the setting is great the sex is tasteful and the people seem real in there setting fawls and all

would love to see you a another fallout fic
Lazer Cut chapter 18 . 8/18/2014
I just finished reading this fic today, and it's been an enjoyable experience to keep my head off stuff. As have been mentioned before, the fic lacked an overhanging plot, as there were no goal for the characters to chase after, well, other than to survive that is. In one way this is bad as it doesn't grip the reader that hard, but in another way it does a better job in conveying the emotions of the wasteland life. In the wasteland, what other goal is there really than to try to survive?

The characters were wonderful. They seemed real and all had both their bad sides and their good sides. It would be hard to place characters after the "karma" meter from FO3, and in my opinion that's alot more preferable than get slapped a "he's good" or "he's evil" tag in your face.

Of the three long Fallout fics I've read until now, this is definitely the best. It gave a lot more real view of the wasteland life, and placing it outside the games was a fresh breath.
Raven Azura Ivy chapter 18 . 2/22/2014
That was awesome. Amazing. I loved every second of it. From Abigail's surfacing to the very end I was enthralled. Thank you so much for this. I hope Abigail doesn't sue me because I am totally stealing the Bag of Swag!
Guest chapter 4 . 5/3/2013
Wow abbys an effen badass eh, this is the best chapter yetvin my humble oppinion, easy to read, I read the whole chapter in one sitting (usually I break a few times) your very good with words, lookin forward to chapter five..
Guest chapter 3 . 5/3/2013
Off I go to chapter 4, your a good writer bro, im not the most edjumacated dude but I find this to be a good read.
Guest chapter 1 . 5/3/2013
Good start brah..
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