|Reviews for What If|
| THANK YOU chapter 9 . 12/15/2013
THIS IS GREAT. I've seriously been looking for THIS EXACT FIC since I finished Another Note, and this is even so much better than I was imagining. Awesome job, seriously. Your L is spot on, which is a rarity in stories where L has any kind of romance, so I was super impressed. Naomi is also great. You've really shown how her character has grown and developed since LA.
You might know this, but I read that the authors of Death Note ended up killing off Naomi Misora because she was just too smart and they didn't think readers would buy that she wouldn't reveal Light as Kira, like, immediately. Basically, if she'd been there then Light would have been defeated much earlier and L wouldn't have died and the authors wouldn't have gotten their evil tragic ending. But that's what fanfiction is for! So thank you for writing this. And I do hope someday you'll continue, though it's been over a year... You're a great writer :)
| secretslockedintheheart chapter 9 . 11/12/2013
You have written this story really well and portrayed the characters perfectly.
And I do enjoy these two L and Naomi,sadly there isn't many stories written with them together.
All in all, I love this story and am looking forward to the next chapter.
| SootyThunder chapter 9 . 10/3/2013
This was really good I hope you write a new chapter soon
| ForeshadowedFate chapter 9 . 9/4/2013
Wow! What an original idea for a story! I've only seen maybe one or two other fics with L and Naomi together, but this is really the only actual good one so far.
I'm glad you decided to keep both Naomi AND L alive, as I enjoyed both of them quite thoroughly. I also like how you're slowly building up the relationship between the two of them instead of just rushing headlong into it, and I find it kind of cute how you have them really reveal their actual personalities when alone together, such as L smiling and making jokes and Naomi baking for him. I'm more inclined to go by the standard LxLight pairing and originally wasn't sure how I felt about the latter being the antagonist, but after the first couple of chapters, I kind of eased into it and really hope Naomi and L can catch him real soon. Oh, and I think it's really like them to know that they truly love the other, but don't quite know how to act on it and put it off until they think they're ready.
The way you're kind of keeping the events and plot parallel to the canon is also interesting. How you have L and Naomi working with the task force to catch Light and Misa while going through the scenes of the canon really make it work very well, making it both predictable and unpredictable at times.
The dialogue is intelligent, humorous, and suspenseful. One of the things I love about it is that I actually feel like I'm reading right out of the manga or "Another Note" with the way the conversations and narrations go. Of course, your own style of writing makes it unique and changes it up from the canon, but it's still fun to read, nonetheless.
I guess my only real criticism would be on some of the spelling/grammar, but it's really not that noticeable.
I noticed that this was last updated almost a year ago, so I'm not sure when you'll get back to it, but I really hope it's sometime soon! I can't wait to see what you do next with it! Keep up the great work!
| reader d chapter 9 . 7/8/2013
hey no worries, thank you for updating this great story, it makes me realize that just because a story hasn't been touched in while, doesnt mean its dead.
| CryNevermore chapter 1 . 7/3/2013
Sup r u still alive? Btw, great plot and story . Favorited it! Update soon pls...
| doctor anthony chapter 9 . 6/12/2013
A great fic here so far I really liked it update soon.
| snoopie rey chapter 9 . 5/19/2013
Hey, still alive? Are u ok? Did smthng bad happened? When are u gonna update? It has been months. But I understand, a good story takes long to write..
| Snoopie chapter 9 . 5/5/2013
U still alive? Hey Update!
| BATMAN chapter 8 . 4/4/2013
Maaann.. that was awesome! Please! Do hurry please? I am really really addicted to it I can't even save Gotham right now! Hurry! Btw, make L have the thought of how is it kissing Naomi.. yeh I know, I'm a perv . Its wat ur thinking right.. But the mere thought of L thinking it, cute. Damn my perv mind!
| You're awesome chapter 9 . 4/3/2013
Thank you sooo much! I am really.. uhhh.. let's just say this is fucking awsome! Please,please,please .. PLEASE DO MORE! This is the best!
| Guest chapter 6 . 4/3/2013
God, this is a fucking masterpiece! I love you!
| The Unchained Melody chapter 9 . 3/29/2013
This is a review more for the last 9 chapters than one in particular. I must admit I adore this pairing and so, to see such a well written, gripping story for it makes me extremely happy. You have no idea how much I enjoyed reading this. It helps they are my two favorite Death Note characters. I feel with their sense of justice and intelligence they had a dynamic that would make for a great couple. And here, you've shown this beautifully. I love how you delved into their minds, that you let us see their small reactions, and showed their friendship and loyalty to each other grow each chapter. Absolutely fantastic story and I hope for a chapter 10!
| doingsomeliving chapter 9 . 1/10/2013
I just started to read your fanfic and I have to said that is wonderfull, imaginig Naomi alive and cooperating with the Task Force, well with L, it's too interesting. I'm willing to read what will happen next, I just can't wait to see Misa come into scene and what it's gonna going with the imprisonment of she and Light and the Higuchi case.
By the way, is Near and Mello going to appear on this? Just curiosity...
Anyways, I hope you to no delay with the next chapter.
| Hello-Sweetie19 chapter 9 . 1/2/2013
This was a fantastic chapter and I am definitely wanting to see more on how their relationship will develop! Contact me any time you feel the need to or whenever y get the time. Keep up the great work!