|Reviews for Time to Dance|
| joster13 chapter 1 . 11/1/2009
This was a beautiful chapter in its own way. It described how strong Gippal and Rikku were and I think you deserve a lot more credit than this story got (serious 7 reviews? Something's not right...) Anyway its extremely hard for me to not cry right now, poor Rikku, poor Gippal. Such a sad story and very well written. :]
But two things: why is this rated M? It's not at all... M-ish (just wondering). And the second, it would probably be better to put translations there on the page because opening a new window was really annoying all the time to translate. (Scrolling don't is pretty annoying to.. but I might just be lazy.) And that's pretty much it.
Anyways, again beautiful, well written story. Very emotional. :] And Thank you for writing it :]
| Angel Taisha chapter 1 . 10/13/2009
This was so horribly sad, and I can understand how bad you must have felt while you wrote it. I wrote a sad R/G chapter in my fic last week and OMG was it hard; I didn't feel right for hours afterward. I applaud those that can write these sorts of chapters/fics without any sort of emotional attachment because I know I can't. Even if my characters face hardship, they always manage to find happiness.
I definitely felt the emotions as I read this, and secretly hoped somehow it wouldn't have ended the way it did, but it is what it is. Stories like these are necessary every so often, I think. You did a great job capturing Rikku's heartache and despair, both at that present moment and the one with her mother. The Al-Bhed language inter-weaved very well within the fic, and you're right- it wouldn't have been as good with the English. Overall...great job! Only a person with no heart could walk away from this story untouched.
| murdocaugust chapter 1 . 12/30/2008
You're completely right, the story would not have been so emotional or poignant if you had not used Al Bhed between the two lovers and the mother and daughter. The most heart wrenching part for me was when in his last breath he called her 'my girl...' Utterly beautiful. I commend you on a brilliant, touching read. :)
| Songsa chapter 1 . 8/30/2008
Wow, well you definitely got the tears flowing from this reader. This story was to beautiful. I first read your reviews and they all talk about crying. So I went into this thinking, "Naw, I'm not gonna cry," until I read this line:
"I c-can't fight this a-anymore. Rikku, I'm afraid.”
Then you really hit home with:
"I'm not rea-dy to d-die!”
That line alone has so much meaning to me. I think 'cause it reminded me of when I had to put one of my horses to sleep because he had broken his leg while turned out in the pasture. I held his head in my lap as he died and I was talking to him and petting him, but all the while I could tell he was fighting the Euthasol. I could tell that he didn't feel ready to die either. After he calmed down, the vet even let me use her stethoscope to listen to his heartbeat fade away.
I know that the death of an animal doesn't compare to the death of a lover, but my horses are very special to me. I remember telling him that it was ok to go.
Also, when Cid came in, that was a very touching moment as well.
"He was afraid. He was scared, daddy…”
That line was very powerful.
Ok, I'm rambling now. Great job with this. I, a non Rikku/Gippal supporter, enjoyed this story.
| IFocusOnThePain chapter 1 . 8/14/2008
You said it all at the end.
"beautiful in a sad, strange way."
I completely understand why it was so difficult for you to write; I had tears in my eyes as I read it.
I enjoy Rippal fluff immensely, but that was just as good, and an original idea too.
Congratulations on finishing it.
| wildmage89 chapter 1 . 7/29/2008
The hopelessness and desperation are definitely there and I could see how writing something like this would take a lot out of a person. It's good, really really good. Thank you for taking the time to write this, even though it was difficult. I liked it very much.
| Gwen chapter 1 . 7/19/2008
I actually felt the story lost some of its impact as I kept having to flip back and forth between the translator and the story, but I agree that using the English just wouldn't have the same tone as the Al Bhed.
Very nicely written story.
| Fayetta chapter 1 . 7/16/2008
Wow! From the way that the summary made this story sound, I definitely didn't expect what I got after I read it. I was expecting something happy and possibly a little fluffy. But I should have read the genre.
Aside from the shock, I want to tell you that my heart was BREAKING the further I read. I didn't mind reading the Al Bhed. You were right, it really did add a lot to the story. It made it feel more real; because Rikku and Gippal would speak Al Bhed.
I really liked the flashbacks to Rikku and her mother. That's where I really started to get choked up and when I realized that the story wasn't going to be as happy as I had expected. It was eerie, almost chilling, how the flashbacks mirrored what was going on in the 'present' of the story.
I'm in complete shock.
I don't know what to say other than that I think this is a wonderful story! There was so much emotion. There was feeling; it was so real that I have goosebumps. I'm actually still crying and there's a lump in my throat that I know would prevent me from speaking if I were to try.
I understand why this is a oneshot. There is no need to write anything more than this. If you'd meant to make it heartbreaking, you succeeded. If you'd meant to make it feel complete, you did.
Thank you, thank you, thank you so much for writing this story! And thanks even more for posting it. This piece was, obviously, very personal for you. It must have been so hard to share.
Please write something more with Gippal and Rikku, even through the sadness, you were able to make them feel like themselves. You didn't stretch their characterizations really at all. And, in the moments, they were very believable.
Jesus, though! The way she calls Cid 'daddy' at the end makes my heart scream. You have a wonderful way with words. I can't get over it! Please write something more soon! You're amazing! You would be on my favorites list if I had an account! Hell, I might even make one just to put you there.
I hope everyone else that reads this story enjoys it! Take care and good luck in the future. I'm hoping for another Rippal very soon!