Reviews for Total Eclipse of the Heart
Twicebitten chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
another amazing chapter

edward talking with his daughter is too adorable for words!

my favorite line had to be:

“Nuh-uh! I love you times…” I heard her pause, and more muffled voices filled the earpiece, “Times infinite! Papa says you can’t beat that, Daddy! So don’t even try!”

it seriously made me giggle.

keep up the great work you guys!

movieandbookgirl chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
Great job guys! I'm seriously loving this.
JaspersJoy01 chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
i really like this. edward is so cute with his little girl. cant wait for more!
XskyXdancerX chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
very good. I like Edward's character, he is loving and caring. It's good to show how much he adores his little girl. I like Bella's character too, it just surprised me that she was a little bold in this chapter excepting the invitation. ButI like this story so far. Update soon! :)
Cupid's Jinx chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
-squeals- Friday nights are now going to be my favourite nights of the week! (And I curse my mother for the fact that I'm not going to BE here for the next two Fridays -growls-)

Both you and Hayden are SO amazing with Edward and Bella! The characters seem so real, it's fantastic, it really is!

Can't wait to come back from those dredful ten days in a tent to find two chapters waiting! So expect reviews on Sunday 10th from me!


Briandelight chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
that was insanely good. I LOVE Edward in this story. I praise Hayden for his characterization. keep up the good work guys! can't wait for more!
smurfrockposse17 chapter 2 . 7/25/2008

1. i totally think you should have another review crew. i think it's an awesome idea ]

2. hayden, you're insane for thinking your edward isn't good!

3. it was fantastic like always! i loved that bella decided to read romeo and juliet after edward left. i mean, hell, if my body guard was that hot i'd be all over him!

i can't wait for next week!
mischief-maker1 chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
OMG! You guys rock COMPLETELY! I LOVE this story! Great job. I can't wait for more! Oh, and count me in for the review crew if you're still accepting applications! hehehe...
sweet333249 chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
Wow! You and Hayden are wonderful writers! Please update soon as possible!
PoUrThEcHaMpAgNe.O.O chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
Wow! I love this story! And Not just a summer fling kind of love either. Its more along the lines of complete and total adoration... Anyways I'm going to make this a two part review. A part for ashel-13 and a part for Hayden. Okayy here goes.

ashel-13- ahh. Okayy well as soon as I saw your name under the Author part in the email I was stoked! I loove MLOONAA and Dont Stop Believing. They're my favorite stories on here. Really. Anyways. I love your Bella. In all your stories. Yew write Bella so well. I love how she is stuck on the whole pretty boys no good thing. Edward will just have to prove her wrong ;).

Hayden- I love your Edward! Yew write the best Edward POV I've read on here. Its normally a little better when there's a male writing the male POV, but wow. I agree with ashel. Yew make Edward sound uber hott. I love the way he interacts with Libby. It kinda hits close to home cos in a way he reminds me of my dad.(besides the fact that he's the hottest thing since... Well, ever :) but the whole bug thing. Yeah. My dad called me that. I love that its in the story. Also the way he was towards the waitress. Loved it! Usually Edwards that yew read shy away but I like that he went for it. Anyhoo...

Update soon guys! -PoUrThEcHaMpAgNe.O.O.
Lauren-xo chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
First; damn straight you need a Review Crew. Haha yeah, I'm just a bit enthusiastic?

I really liked this chapter and Hayden is an excellent writer, I like Edward's serious bodyguard to loving father switchbacks. Also thanks for clearing up what kind of officer he was. I wasn't sure if he was just a normal cop or SWAT, but you cleared it.

Libby is just the cutest thing, and the way Edward treats her is so precious. It's an 'aw' moment throughout their whole conversation. But for me the biggest aw was when Edward said, "Listening to Alice’s soft banter with my daughter made me smile, wishing that I had someone who would be Libby’s mother."

So I have a question in regards to that too:: Will we ever find out what happened to Libby's mother?

Poor Bella. Even as an actress she has little self confidence in her abilities. I love her characterization, and the fact that she almost killed herself by tripping. I must admit that I've done that way too many times to count though! In fact, as I write this my brother comes barging in the room yelling at the top of his lungs and I fell off the bed. : Not smart, but what can you do?

Great work you two, I'm already hopelessly addicted and wanting more!

-x Lauren
SheWhoLovesAllCullenMen chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
A review crew would be great!

Hayden: Amazing Edward perspective!

Ashel: Great job as always.

It was a little repetitive. I'd like to hear a bit more on Edward and Bella and that relationship. I can't wait for more...
reginah72 chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
Great chapter and I'm looking forward to the next one. chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
I love this Edward and Bella. I can't wait to read about the Birthday party and libby meeting Bella. Please update soon.
Raychelle Edwards chapter 2 . 7/25/2008
aw i found myself smiling at little libby! and i dont even like kids. lol. so that means it was a job well done! good work. i'll be waiting for the next update.
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