Reviews for The Big Hellsing: The Forks Affair
Guest chapter 6 . 3/4
Really Alucard is somewhat of the Devil's child really.
P.H. Wise chapter 1 . 10/6/2013
what is this i dont even
Ciruno Rowe 'Augmented Conduit chapter 6 . 4/18/2013
Oh man I'm loving this crossover fic more and more. Which makes me wonder why this isn't in the crossover section. Well either way this fic is just too good

The laughs I receive here is loud and the story is reasonable (but who needs stories for humor fics anyway). Anyway I'll keep on reading for the sake of comedy and alucard
BBWulf chapter 7 . 12/11/2012
this is possibly the most entertaining series i have ever read. and thats saying quite a bit.
Mrs. SLinKY chapter 1 . 9/10/2012
LMAO! I love stories with humor in them. This is certainly a change up. :) Very funny. Happy writing!
luna sanguine chapter 5 . 9/2/2012
lol the hurry quote is hilarious considering luke valentine looks a little like a long haired jasper
MuddyWolf chapter 6 . 6/25/2012
LOLOLLOL, I'm not sure whether to feel worse for Carlisle getting kicked in the groin or for Jasper and scary sex. XD

I love Alucard and Edward's showdown with each other, and by the time they're done arguing over movie directors they forgot what they were fighting about. XD

Love how Alucard's 'charm' takes the form of an aphrodisiac magic spell. oO I can't imagine Alucard going to save Bella is a good thing. XDD

I also like Seras singing/dancing along to country music, and Integra shuts her up. XD The way that Seras "like magic, hangs her head in shame" is so funny, great job there XD

That was also hilarious when the Cullen family become slightly less repulsed by Alucard when they find out that he and Carlisle killed Hitler. XD

By the absolute best part was the growl-hiss fest between Seras and Edward. XDDDDDDDD

A pleasure to read as always! : DD Slowly I make my way through this fic..
surveillent 314 chapter 2 . 6/12/2012
edwards gonna get raped
MuddyWolf chapter 1 . 1/15/2012
Pure genius. I was laughing all the way-the moment Alice said that they're having a threesome I was XDDDDDDDDDDD. And that scene overwhelmed my expectations-Alucard initially in a red towel and devil's horns staring down a terrified Jasper made my day. XDD I like how you elaborated on the different vampire species-Nosferatu are infinitely stronger than, what did you call them, the Unstet, but Carlisle was able to get the jump on him. I like how after Alucard explains how they knew each other, then he stays the night for dinner. EPIC. XDDD

I also love the discrepancy between Alice's horrific visions-Alucard driving a muscle car is somehow just as terrifying than him flying or phasing-by the way, I love how you describe the fight scene, with Alucard phasing towards-I can't remember if it was Rosalie, but those details just show how amped up Alucard is. I also like his magical chains and living coat, truly terrifying for the fight, and hilarious in the bed scene. XDD

The bird being atomized by Alucard's gun makes for stunning imagery-that it's overkill makes it hilarious and horrifying at the same time. I like how Alice's vision comes to pass, but misses the details that would make this an unintimidating manhunt-Alucard doing something "radical" and buying a map, and then not being able to read the map. XDD So great

I love your portrayal of Integra-very measured, all-business but when she gives Alucard the order to kill Jasper she is quietly maniacal. XDD

I love how Alucard changed the reason for punishing Jasper-Integra ordered him to avenge those killed by Jasper in the vampire wars, Alucard wants to make him pay for trashing the rental car. Superb. XDDD

This just gets better and better each chapter, thanks for writing so awesomely! _
MuddyWolf chapter 5 . 1/15/2012
Pure genius. I was laughing all the way-the moment Alice said that they're having a threesome I was XDDDDDDDDDDD. And that scene overwhelmed my expectations-Alucard initially in a red towel and devil's horns staring down a terrified Jasper made my day. XDD I like how you elaborated on the different vampire species-Nosferatu are infinitely stronger than, what did you call them, the Unstet, but Carlisle was able to get the jump on him. I like how after Alucard explains how they knew each other, then he stays the night for dinner. EPIC. XDDD

I also love the discrepancy between Alice's horrific visions-Alucard driving a muscle car is somehow just as terrifying than him flying or phasing-by the way, I love how you describe the fight scene, with Alucard phasing towards-I can't remember if it was Rosalie, but those details just show how amped up Alucard is. I also like his magical chains and living coat, truly terrifying for the fight, and hilarious in the bed scene. XDD

The bird being atomized by Alucard's gun makes for stunning imagery-that it's overkill makes it hilarious and horrifying at the same time. I like how Alice's vision comes to pass, but misses the details that would make this an unintimidating manhunt-Alucard doing something "radical" and buying a map, and then not being able to read the map. XDD So great

I love your portrayal of Integra-very measured, all-business but when she gives Alucard the order to kill Jasper she is quietly maniacal. XDD

I love how Alucard changed the reason for punishing Jasper-Integra ordered him to avenge those killed by Jasper in the vampire wars, Alucard wants to make him pay for trashing the rental car. Superb. XDDD

This just gets better and better each chapter, thanks for writing so awesomely! _
MuddyWolf chapter 4 . 1/11/2012
Ah, I love this. It doesn't need an M rating, since it's just a reference to a sexual situation, and you didn't describe it in detail that would merit an M rating, so you're good. But that's just my opinion ;

That prank call and how Charlie practically had a mild heart attack was hilarious, and of course, Bella is coincidentally at the police station in Seattle, that's just perfect XDDD I love your comic timing, and the setup is brilliant. XD

I like how Alucard is surrounded by one or two lackeys who he uses as a sounding board-that he's so insecure is priceless, particularly about his kingliness. XD You captured Alucard's mentality as someone who should be a king but isn't treated as one-gossip matters to him, he resents those humors but it's almost as if he's complaining about them, even sulking about his poor reputation. And his servant is there to cheer him up/shore up his deflated ego. It's a circus and a delight! _

I like how though Alucard is obstinate about getting his money back for the XBox, and that he debates with Mercer if Dark Knight was a good movie or not, we still see Alucard's characteristic rage-when he's snarling, exposing his "shark-like teeth", it reminds me of the part in Hellsing OVA when he catches Rip's bullet in his teeth. Very scary, very Alucard. : D That you make Alucard's character distinct makes the fic awesome, enhancing the crack. : DDD I also like how Alucard alternates lethargy with manic-ness-like how after he hangs up the phone he "slumped down in his chair". Another excellent chapter, thank you for writing this! _
Captain Lycan chapter 38 . 1/10/2012
Bree Tanner may have her name in the title of the chapter but Wesker was the star of the show all the way man _! His ruthlessness, His cruelty, and His arrogance were all captured flawlessly.

The flashback to "Wesker-sausage" and the bike scene were funny but Albert's evil and cruelty achieved total chapter saturation!

On a serious note I wonder what kind of effect actually witnessing the execution will have on Bella's decision to become a vampire?

I can't wait for the wedding awesome work as always, peace out!
Jack Hawthorne chapter 38 . 1/9/2012
*whistles*

Daym it's a long time since I have read this!

I really need to reread it some time, to refresh it at some point.

I think I had another pen name the last time it updated too, but I can't remember what it was...

Oh well. Nice update D A very random sequence at the start though; why was that included?

Well, 'cept to give some (very obvious) foreshadowing at what will happen in the wedding. I am looking forward to that one xD
Baxyratty chapter 38 . 1/9/2012
Schro you fruity minipulative bastard you! Greatwork as always good sir. I'm starting to enjoy the new openings by the way. Well lets see. you compleatly nail wesker's bad-asserery (yes i know what's a made up wordd :P) and brees death wist just depressing. Really though Mama Cullen could save her there for a second. Oh well, yet another corpse in wesker's wake, Although the part with the bike was hilarious, as was Seras's interpretation of the avents with aro. Something tells me if the paring i like ended up in this story, she'd have one of the mega anime nosebleeds

Ok so, Bella and Edward are getting married next time. ooh boy, that is going to be a travisty of epic proportions, and i can't freaking wait for it. Keep this up man!

Baxyratty
blacksand1 chapter 38 . 1/8/2012
Underage drinking? Aw YEAH! This chapter was great, in every way, shape and form. I can't wait to see what comes next! … Gosh, my reviews for your stories always feel so lame and short D:

-Blacksand1
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