|Reviews for The Right Choice|
| Gallagher Girl chapter 1 . 4/6/2011
I loved it. Really. It was beautiful, and I think it takes what wasn't in the book but in the movie and makes it make sense. Great, great job. :)
| Twilightgirl1724 chapter 1 . 11/19/2010
wow im surprised that was really good, held my attention very well. good Job :)
| Ghostwriter chapter 1 . 8/10/2010
Hey, cool. Catch ya on the flip side.
| s. du jour chapter 1 . 8/13/2009
Hm. I like it, but if you cleaned up the beginning a bit, it would be way better.
| Regina chapter 1 . 5/23/2009
This is AMAZING I seriously almost cried at the up the good work!:)
| Strange Amairaini XIII chapter 1 . 12/20/2008
This story is different from the other Suspian stories I read which Susan ends up with Caspian. But I still like it. Great job!
| CrossoverAUman chapter 1 . 12/5/2008
Wow. All I can say is Wow. This was beautifuly written, you seemed to have put youre heart and soul into this one. You captured, what is, for me, the true spirit of Narnia.
| darthluna01 chapter 1 . 12/4/2008
You made a really good point, but the separation you used with the "18" was rather confusing.
| Sucre Bebe chapter 1 . 11/16/2008
Awesome story Protector! I loved it!
| Animus Wyrmis chapter 1 . 8/8/2008
Parts of this I really liked. I have huge issues with Susan/Caspian as presented in the movies (in bookverse, I don't even think it's remotely possible), so of course when I saw this I had to read it.
I loved this line: "Nothing ever happens the same way twice, Queen Susan. If you stay now, then you will live here and die here. Your siblings will return with nothing but a corpse. Your parents will not truly understand what happened to you, and neither will your friends in your world." It seemed very Aslan is (the first sentence was perfect), and it seemed fair, in a lot of ways-even though it doesn't seem to work with *canon*; there isn't any mention of people going into Narnia and back to our world with any time passing (Polly and Digory do lose hours in Charn/the Wood, of course). I liked the concept, though. (Did you need the death thing to have it work? Wouldn't Susan be *more* separated from her children if she spent sixty years in Narnia, had children, and died, only to return to her twelve-year-old self and her family, who couldn't understand?)
Peter's line seemed completely unlike either characterization of him-especially since he is a king at this point. Would he whisper it? Presumably at one point they all faced the idea that one monarch might have to leave Narnia for a diplomatic marriage, and might not come back.
I think you're looking for surely, not surly.
This next part just didn't work for me. You say Caspian is going to have to rule over "corrupt lords as well as loyal Animals and other creatures. While in Narnia’s Golden Age it had been easy to tell who was a friend and who was an enemy, Caspian would always carry the knowledge that it could be dangerous to trust anyone too much until he was sure of their motivation" and then you imply that Susan wouldn't be at home in that sort of Narnia.
Really? This is Susan, who fought against the White Witch and her supporters. Susan, whose sister was almost betrayed by a friendly-seeming faun and whose *brother* sold her out. Susan, who lived in a Narnia where *trees* had gone over to the other side. Susan, who had to *run away* from a suitor on a diplomatic visit because he wanted to take her captive-and then watch as he attacked Archenland! Surely Susan is no stranger to political intrigue, assassins, and people who would betray her. Now, if you want to have her only remembering the good parts of Narnia-which she might do; there's a possibility that she's allowed herself to forget all the nastiness-then that's fine, but you should make us see that; the way it is it just doesn't make any sense with Susan's character.
(And then seriously, she thinks a girl raised with no company but her father is going to make a better queen than the one who ushered in Narnia's Golden Age?)
I think you're rushing the next few sections. It's a really interesting idea to have a conscious, one-time decision about abandoning Narnia, but I think you're glossing too much. Can she really wake up one morning and forget all of that? Think about if you woke up and made the decision to stop believing you had gone to elementary school-would that work? Would you think it would work? She's also, at this point, had a few years without Caspian-has she really not gotten over him? If that is...why is she still in love with him, when she only thought she was in love in Narnia?
The final section is far too quick. First she's in love with Caspian and forgetting it all, and then...what? She's not? I also find it a little odd that there's so little of her family-she stayed for them, didn't she? But I'm not feeling it at all here. I *love* your last line, though!
| major.bookworm chapter 1 . 7/30/2008
harsh reality. i liked it. too many happy-go-lucky fanfics. great job!
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 1 . 7/27/2008
The length of the story cut into some of the romantic elements of the story but I do like the idea that Susan manages to find a sound way to convince herself that she didn't belong in Narnia. I always did think that Lewis gave her a bad rap as the story went along, particularly when he basically used her as a pariah for the message of the failures of someone who had "gone off the good path". Still, all religious allegories aside, I like how you covered Susan's thoughts as the books passed by, although I would have liked to have a longer look into her mind.
| Vaneria Potter chapter 1 . 7/26/2008
I loved this response to the Susan/Caspian flood that has been taking over this genere lately.
To be honest, I have never considered Susan/Caspian to be workable, no matter how they felt about each other. Futher elaboration on this, however, tends to send me into a rant, so I'll refrain.
I think you have done a wonderful job with the Susan/Caspian pairing, while also being realistic and Canon faithful. Great work.
BTW, I have a few narnia stories of my own that I think are good, but could really do with some constructive critisism. Could you help me out?
| AJ McLeod chapter 1 . 7/25/2008
Finally someone put up a story where the people stay where they are supposed to!
| Shining Friendship chapter 1 . 7/25/2008
Very well-written. It was a good insight to Susan's thoughts of Narnia between "Prince Caspian," "Voyage of the Dawn Treader," "The Silver Chair," and "The Last Battle." Great job!