|Reviews for Eclipsed|
| Guest chapter 3 . 1/25
Look you do know how absurd this creepy story is dont you. NOBODY liked Bella for her personality and Bella didnt like anybody nor love Dedward for his personality. Bella is as shallow as a puddle. Bella is as twisted as a girl can get she uses people without a seconds hesitation. something tells me Bella knows how deeply diseased and ugly she is as a human and thats why she is so ready to shed it. It isnt beauty or love or forevever. While she is terribly shallow and a sleazy coward totally unable and unwilling to live life on its own terms, she is also deathly afraid that she will be found out. That Jake will spot the ugliness and the plague inside. The corpses dont care who she is. to them she is like a pet or a stepford wife. someone to play act the part of a wife and sister and the dress up doll. She is quite pathetic.
| Guest chapter 3 . 1/25
What a stupid story. Nothing like the canon characters and oh my so original..
What a waste of time.
| dorsa20 chapter 3 . 10/28/2014
Omg...I felt so bad for her... :'( I wish u hd written a chapter where bella finds out. !
| Kuroi Atropos chapter 3 . 7/19/2010
That would be a fascinating development of Jacob imprinting on Nessie. Canon indicates that Sam still felt something for Leah, but he just couldn't ignore what had happened with Emily. I think that it would be entertaining to further explore this particular aspect with the main triangle. Especially with how deeply SM had implied Jacob loved Bella, I can't see all of those emotions coming from the fact that she would be Nessie's Mother.
I mean, if you consider the implied assumptions of the Jacob/Bella/Nessie thing then why didn't Jacob feel similarly protective of Edward if he was Nessie's Father? Or was only Bella the key parent? Which draws disturbing implications if Bella and Jake had ended up together. The whole imprinting thing has bugged me royally in the past (seriously, I don't much like Twilight, but a friend of mine loves it so I have been re-reading it and delving into fic to try finding something about it that doesn't make me cringe so I can geek with her) and you illustrated rather nicely one of the reasons why. Emotions don't just magically disappear.
I think I love the characterizations in your stories, you don't ignore the character flaws (even to a certain extent those you reveal with Nessie's word choice and basic assumptions on the flashes she gets from Jacob, she can't truly read him after all) and you add more subtle depth (deliberately or not, I applaud you for some of your touches that make me like your versions of these characters) than many, even to a certain extent SM.
I like your writing style in this, a bit more detailed (skimming over the "beauty" parts thankfully) than canon writing style but a nice match on the simplistic approach that SM takes. I want to nit-pick your grammar, paragraph structure and formatting, however that is a sign that I can't find glaring mistakes.
| LJ Summers chapter 3 . 4/29/2010
I was cruising (something I rarely do these days) and saw this story in a community. Wow, what a sad premise!
I feel terrible for Nessa (like how you did that, btw) and for Jake, too. Sounds like your E and B are cool, but J and R/N aren't and that totally stinks. You wrote it very well, with an ancient, pained voice that I really appreciate.
I wish I could see a HAPPY ending for these two, but I don't. And that's just ... so sad. I guess imprinting can really suck sometimes.
| Gone Gone Very Gone chapter 1 . 7/14/2009
Gosh, that's really kinda sad. Nessie is such an amzing character, i think you did a good job capturing her.
| The Predatory Wasp chapter 3 . 7/4/2009
wow, this was really good.
ive never read something like it before.
| Shevamp chapter 3 . 5/13/2009
first it is nessie not nessa
secondly it was an awesomely best story of them ever
thirdly nessa is 4 vanessa only i should knw dats my sisters name but btw we do call her nessie 2.
fourthly srry if u think im pissed at u for complaining but little things like dat always have annoyed me so its not u its ur writing nickname of renesmee (dont know how 2 spell her name)
| stsword chapter 3 . 2/5/2009
I enjoyed the story, but realisticly I don't think that a werewolf can love someone more than their imprint, but then again Nessie wouldn't be the first daughter made insecure by their mother.
| loonygirl22 chapter 3 . 11/1/2008
I was thinking of the same thing. If Edward trumped the "soul mate", why can't Jacob trump the "imprint"? I love your story, it was well-written. Keep up the good work!
| numba1shorty chapter 3 . 8/31/2008
i have to say, thats a very interesting situation to be in. its so sad. now, i dont agree that its possible for jacob to still see bella intimately but, ur right, they never said it was impossible. i just think it was like an unwritten rule. oh what a tangled web. loved this story. especially the chapter names! lolerz! hilarious. i like ur portrayal of renesme. shes a pretty funny character.i think ill put u on author alert in case u do more renesme stories.
| MeLAni.WAnDerER chapter 1 . 8/11/2008
it was renesmee all along who jacob loved, not bella. it was why jacob and bella could never stay away from each other. now that renesmee is here jacob doesnt love bella like that anymore, he loves her just as a friend. nothing more.
| ImGallStaffSorcererOfLIGHT chapter 3 . 8/10/2008
I love this, and I loved the book, I just wish that Nessie wasn't there. I know she's the big plot in Breaking Dawn, I just think it would be too weird for her, Bella, and Edward to go to highschool together. Awkward!
Lovely story, though. It was written very well.
| imisscalvin chapter 3 . 8/9/2008
Aww. That was sad. But I really did like it.
| dont-touch-me-im-awkward chapter 3 . 8/9/2008
Oh. Poor Nessie. The man she loves loves her mom. Jerry, Jerry!