The characters in the story are complete idiots. The plot was cliche. Bella and edward are so insecure and have zero self confidence. Bella's insecure thoughts made my head hurt. You showed success to be something so easy in your story. I have only read 13 chapter and I can't continue reading it anymore. There is some good humor in your story, no doubt but at the same it the plot is bland and very unrealistic.

The story so cliche.

Douse? Douses? Ruff? Bight? I am so confused of these spellings. So very, very confused.

Cute! Good work

Ah, I normally skip author's notes but read the one at the top about your spelling. It's good that you acknowledge it and are doing your best to improv it! Good work on cultivating the story thus far.

does, not douses

I'm going to assume english is not your first language. If so, good efforts so far!

Sign, not sine

Fucking cliched mess this turned into.

The author flat out made all the problems in their relationship on Edward when it's obvious some of the things are Bella's fault.

The most blatant is, the author had Bella kick Edward out, and is not having bella say 'He left me'.

Get fucking real. Dropping this pile of garbo.

Honestly, I'm starting to hate the twilight fandom, same shit over and over. Guy grovels all story, girls dates other dudes while claiming to love the guy, and so and so.

Get original pleb.

its not sine, it's not ruff, how do you expect people to read with such blatant errors

i agree d first chapter sucked ... thank god bella reduced her stupidity after that ... but .. I DIDNT TOLERATE UR DUMB SPELLING MISTAKES SO THAT YOU CAN LEAVE THE STORY INCOMPLETE . N U HAVE GUTS TO TAG THE STORY AS COMPLETE .

I'm sure other readers have already mentioned this but I'm going to say it anyways - your writing needs a lot of reviewing on your part. The spelling mistakes are actually mood killers for me which is rather unfortunate because I really liked the summary and was looking forward to the story.

I read a few chapters, and then stopped. The spelling is horrific, the plot too thin for words. I think we all normally try to identify with the main character. A "what would I do" type thing. Had he walked into my apartment, I would have laughed, mentioned karma and kicked him out in the street. She is such a doormat.

Sadly, I will not be continuing on. Fix this.

Excellent story! Really enjoyed reading this, and will have to read again in the future :-) I look forward to reading more of your work!