|Reviews for On the Road|
| Darkwood chapter 12 . 4/4/2010
I really enjoyed reading this. Wanted to let you know that. This chapter especially. Poor Leon, he does have really bad luck. I'll be interested to see when (and if) you get to the argument between Jill and Claire.
This period of the continuity is always strange to me. Fertile for stories, but strange, if that makes any sense. It's like my fixation on why Claire had to email Leon to email Chris in CVX. The mysterious clues without any solidification is fun to write. And I'm glad you're writing it.
Because let's be honest... what would a game about this segment of the timeline be like? Day-related deadline? terrible world-sized rpg? It's not... a good game scenario.
Anywho. Enough rambling. Thank you for writing this.
| cjjs chapter 6 . 12/3/2009
Hey, I just stumbled onto this fic and must say that it is very, very good! I really like the slightly disjointed chapters, it really engages the reader and challenges him/her to find out exactly when/where this is taking place.
I only had the time to read a few chapters, but rest assured I will be back for more.
BTW, cheers for the Laughing Cow cheese reference, that stuff is awesome tasty on toast!
| Jackalman22 chapter 1 . 10/11/2009
This story wins by default due to the cameo by the Laughing Cow.
Again, a strong demonstration of your skills is very present in this fic. Each of the character's voices seem to come across so naturally to you. I've grown to really admire your style and storytelling, and were a pool to be going among us amateur RE fanfiction writers, you'd certainly receive my vote for "author most capable of taking the torch from S.D. Perry."
That isn't to say you're a carbon copy of her in any way, and I'm sure you know the high regard we RE lovers have for Ms. Perry's work. With that in mind, I hope you take it as a compliment that your abilities as a writer make me want your stories to be canon.
I particularly loved the interactions between the characters across all chapters. Creating realistic and believable conflict is something you're quite good at, and I found the dialogue between Chris, Leon, Claire, Jill, Rebecca, Barry, etc., to be in top form. The fight between Leon and Chris was written masterfully, portraying the inner-workings of their minds in such a brutal way. The irrationality of their nature as humans, their hotheadedness, and their eventual resolution all served to heighten the experience. And of course, the reactions of the onlookers were also spot on.
I'm not sure how far you plan on taking this fic, but I just wanted to comment on the 'unordered'-ness of it. A few chapters in particular-the one where Leon walks out after being slapped by Claire and happening upon an awkward Chris and Jill, and then the other chapter that explored what Chris and Jill were doing when that happened-they both caught up to one another quite well. Breaking up chapters and disjointedly writing them to meet "in the middle" as it were, is risky as far as style goes, but I quite like it. It shows a faith in the reader to in essence keep up with the author's pacing, while at the same time jumping around in the story to keep things fresh and engaging. What I think I'm trying to say is that the lack of order of the scenes is almost a strength for the story as far as I'm concerned. With so many characters and so many things happening (or, not happening), jumping around is a great way to tell the story.
On a different note, one chapter that was quite memorable for me was the one featuring the Kennedy clan. It isn't easy creating such a dynamic, and I know that I personally find it difficult to essentially "write in" families for some of the main characters. The games introduce the characters to us as standalone entities, and while it's of course likely and plausible that they do have families, it's tough to write them in fanfiction out of fear of embellishing too much and taking too many creative freedoms, and perhaps writing something readers might simply disagree because they envisioned it differently.
Or maybe I'm just weird about my writing fears. In any event, I liked the Kennedys, and the chapters surrounding Leon's story served to clarify the gaps involving his start with the Secret Service, and the relationship he had with his family in light of the events in Raccoon, etc.
So yeah, just wanted to comment on a job well done. I never get tired of reading your work, and the characters seem to come alive in such a vibrant way when you're at the helm.
Keep it up, Madelene!
p.s. thanks again for the advice and the response, by the way! talking shop with another writer is something I haven't done in far too long, and I found it both therapeutic and enlightening.
| Praxis Antigone chapter 11 . 10/20/2008
Hehehe...I'm loving this fight in this chapter :D
| Franivia chapter 11 . 10/20/2008
Nice! I didn't think Leon had it in him to say just nasty things. *claps for him* But bigger props to Chris! I always like seeing him get angry. Major props on this chapter! Can't wait for the others.
| Franivia chapter 10 . 10/20/2008
How sweet. Chris and Jill scenes always make me gush. Just too adorable for words. Hopefully we'll get more in the future ;)
| Hobohunter chapter 11 . 10/20/2008
I was hoping that you would write the fight scene between Leon and Chris! You did a great job with it too. xD Poor Leon, he always gets the crap beat out of him. lol I can't wait for the next update! :D
| evilredmenace chapter 10 . 10/19/2008
The first two chapters threw me through a loop as far as continuity was concerned. Then, I got over it.
These little snapshots are a lot of fun. Fistfight between Chris and Leon? Verbal repartee between Leon and Claire? Sign me up.
And it was nice to see a little of Leon's family background. I always wondered what the explanation would be for a prolonged absence.
| Hobohunter chapter 10 . 10/10/2008
I love stories about when they're all cooped together in hiding. The sexual tension would be soaring high in there! I love the chemistry between Chris and Jill in this chapter too. You did a great job once again! I can't wait for the next update! :)
| Hobohunter chapter 9 . 10/2/2008
The fluidity between Chris and Leon was really well done. This was another great chapter, good job! :D
| Eris Etienne chapter 9 . 10/2/2008
Haha. Of course Jill won the bet; Leon would never go down without a solid fight. Great update. I trust that sometime soon you'll write about the events the lead up to this chapter? :)
| Hobohunter chapter 8 . 9/27/2008
I actually really liked this chapter. I always like to read the stories of the survivors' family and how they'd react to seeing them again. You wrote another great chapter, keep it up! :)
| Eris Etienne chapter 6 . 8/24/2008
Ahh, the dreaded knock on the door! I love the obvious bond between the two in this chapter. It's a shame someone knocked; I always thought Leon and Claire taking things a step further just before he had to leave would make for some pretty interesting drama. Great chapter, as always. ;)
| Hobohunter chapter 7 . 8/22/2008
Aw I thought it was really cute! :3 lol The sexual tension will rise after that little number! xD
Another great chapter! :D
| Hobohunter chapter 6 . 8/22/2008
Arg why a knock at the door, WHY! Totally spoiled the Cleon love! xD Well once again another great chapter :D I can't wait for the next one! :)