|Reviews for Marked|
| witowsmp chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
I'll be really disappointed if this Harry (not the one who had been friends with Draco) is gullible enough to trust anyone with the last name of Malfoy. So far, everyone in this reality has had the same personality as the one from the other reality, even if they didn't seem to at first, and Harry knows it.
I hope Ron doesn't blab what Neville told him, but I have a feeling he will.
I look forward to the next chapter.
| LeoLupin chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
oh, bad move harry...
| respitechristopher chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
And you were worried about too much romance...
This scene couldn't have been much more action-packed unless wands were flying. Between Dumbledore's Fudge impression, the amazing confrontation between Lily and Narcissa (so true to life I thought you might be re-living a tense moment or two of your own), Draco's coming into his Death-Eater own and the Lily/Hermione tension that's moments from breaking up Harry and Hermione, I could barely breathe for all the action.
This is probably the best example of your narrative style I've ever seen. Moving between description and omniscience so seamlessly that the reader doesn't realize it, capturing remarkably full ranges of emotion in a half-dozen well-chosen words, painting scenery and interpersonal tension with the deftest of hands... I really hope you get to write novels for a living, because this is the work of a remarkably gifted writer.
All of a sudden I'm more excited about NaNo to see what you'll come up with, rather than seeing if I can finish it.
| Fibinaci chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
So many tangled webs... I still prefer this Dumbles to the canon one and I'm sad to see this Draco slide into a more canon like posture. Sad as well to see Harry hurt Hermione without meaning to in fact wanting to figure how to do the opposite.
| I'myoursweetestgoodbye chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
O, Draco was a traitor to begin with! I'm glad that Harry understands why Hermione and Lily were so cold to each other.
| I'myoursweetestgoodbye chapter 3 . 8/26/2008
I really liked this chapter. Lily is acting very strangely...but I can somewhat understand why she would be. I can't wait for the next chapter!
| deleted92 chapter 3 . 8/25/2008
Hi there. Just a note to say I am very much enjoying your writing. You have a great command of the language. I like the character development and your alternate Hermione is really clever writing. I am not clear on what happened to the original 'potioned' Harry? Surely he would be the favored son/boyfriend since he's the proper harry for that timeline? That has to get reconciled somehow. I'm sure you have a plan! Anyway, nice job. Let's see more of Sirus interacting with HHr please? They may need a place to hide Harry2 so why not the grim old place?
| aptteach123 chapter 3 . 8/25/2008
WOW! Very interesting chapter. I loved it a lot. Keep up the fabulous work, and please try to update again soon! I can't wait to see what happens next. Will Hermione tell Harry what she and Lily talked about. I think she should.
| Ghostdraconi chapter 3 . 8/25/2008
Nice, it stands to reason that Lily whould have a few trust issues.
| witowsmp chapter 3 . 8/25/2008
It is interesting that Hermione expects Harry to tell her what's bothering him but doesn't think he deserves the same courtesy. There's nothing for her to be afraid of since Harry's been expressing doubts about whether she loves him or his counterpart. To me, that is a natural question, and wouldn't make Harry doubt Hermione any more than he does now (which isn't that much). I doubt that Harry considers Lily to be that good of a judge of character, so he wouldn't suddenly turn on Hermione because Lily doesn't trust her.
| Fibinaci chapter 3 . 8/24/2008
At first I was pleased Lily would play Momma Bear, but then how she basically accused Hermione of being a golddigger out to hurt Harry when she's hurt Harry more lately seemed out of bounds. But ofcourse thanks to Snape Lily cant believe in love anymore can she? And then Hermione keeps her mouth shut to try and protect Harry and his relationship with Lily which is still fragile.
| Fibinaci chapter 2 . 8/24/2008
Good start to your sequel, I loved Hermione basically kicking down the door to protect her man. I had totally forgot about his "friend" Draco I wonder about how that will play out?
| respitechristopher chapter 3 . 8/24/2008
The emotions in here just swirl and tug at you before they beat you over the head repeatedly leaving you a sobbing mess. And that's a good thing - a very good thing, actually.
Quite remarkable. You're accurately (as far as I can tell) portraying characters who are experiencing emotions that come from things that happen so far outside the realm of the reasonable. I mean, who in the hell knows what a mother would feel in Lily's situation? What would any other mother in this situation tell Raven? Who knows, because no one's ever been there before. And under your skillful pen, it doesn't matter that no one's been there before. Hermione is treated just as well, if not better. I hear more than a sniff of indignation in her voice as she tells Harry that nothing's wrong. Just spectacular writing.
Mystik Spiral cameo was brilliant.
| aptteach123 chapter 2 . 8/21/2008
Awesome chapter! I loved it. I can't wait to see what happens next. Keep up the wonderful work, and please try to update again soon! I can't wait to see more Harry/Hermione as well as how Harry and Neville interact now that he knows everything!
| I'myoursweetestgoodbye chapter 2 . 8/18/2008
Wow, this was really good! It'll be cool to see how Harry and Neville will work together!