Reviews for Marked
aptteach123 chapter 6 . 9/14/2008
Awesome chapter! I loved it a lot. Keep up the great work, and please, please try to update again soon! I love this story so much!
Howard Russell chapter 5 . 9/11/2008
I gotta say, I loved your magical sports metaphor. Makes me wonder if muggle Brits have a cricket metaphor or if it's purely an American invention.
I'myoursweetestgoodbye chapter 5 . 9/8/2008
Such a good chapter...I love the Quidditch talk about sex! So funny to hear, especially Neville saying it!
respitechristopher chapter 5 . 9/7/2008
Okay, so in which former life were you a guy, and how did you manage to channel that experience long enough to write this chapter. The feelings you associated with Harry, the confusion, the wanting more combined with the seeming inability to do anything about it... you could have been reading some guy's mind for its accuracy. And the Quidditch was played beautifully - very 15 with its lack of innuendo and focus on substance.

Your Ron and Neville are fleshing out into brilliantly warm, engaging characters that I want to read more about. Especially Neville. Do keep up the brilliance!

-Christopher
Fibinaci chapter 5 . 9/7/2008
Hehe haha bwahahaha haha heh. Nice. I just lurv the idea of Player!Neville.
aptteach123 chapter 5 . 9/7/2008
WOW! That was an awesome, amazing chapter! I loved it a lot. Keep up the awesome work, and I absolutely can not wait to see what will happen next! Please try to update this story again soon!
Howard Russell chapter 4 . 9/5/2008
I just finished "Free Will and Fate" and have started on "Marked." I am most impressed. You have a great talent that isn't marred by your speed. Kudos!

Your character reactions and interactions are far more "real" than seen in most fanfics. They fit the characters and also fit human responses.

Thank you for writing this and for sharing it with us.
aptteach123 chapter 4 . 9/2/2008
I loved this chapter! Thanks for the great work. I can't wait to see what happens next. Please try to update again soon! You write wonderfully!
witowsmp chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
I'll be really disappointed if this Harry (not the one who had been friends with Draco) is gullible enough to trust anyone with the last name of Malfoy. So far, everyone in this reality has had the same personality as the one from the other reality, even if they didn't seem to at first, and Harry knows it.

I hope Ron doesn't blab what Neville told him, but I have a feeling he will.

I look forward to the next chapter.
LeoLupin chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
oh, bad move harry...
respitechristopher chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
And you were worried about too much romance...

This scene couldn't have been much more action-packed unless wands were flying. Between Dumbledore's Fudge impression, the amazing confrontation between Lily and Narcissa (so true to life I thought you might be re-living a tense moment or two of your own), Draco's coming into his Death-Eater own and the Lily/Hermione tension that's moments from breaking up Harry and Hermione, I could barely breathe for all the action.

This is probably the best example of your narrative style I've ever seen. Moving between description and omniscience so seamlessly that the reader doesn't realize it, capturing remarkably full ranges of emotion in a half-dozen well-chosen words, painting scenery and interpersonal tension with the deftest of hands... I really hope you get to write novels for a living, because this is the work of a remarkably gifted writer.

All of a sudden I'm more excited about NaNo to see what you'll come up with, rather than seeing if I can finish it.
Fibinaci chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
So many tangled webs... I still prefer this Dumbles to the canon one and I'm sad to see this Draco slide into a more canon like posture. Sad as well to see Harry hurt Hermione without meaning to in fact wanting to figure how to do the opposite.
I'myoursweetestgoodbye chapter 4 . 8/29/2008
O, Draco was a traitor to begin with! I'm glad that Harry understands why Hermione and Lily were so cold to each other.
I'myoursweetestgoodbye chapter 3 . 8/26/2008
I really liked this chapter. Lily is acting very strangely...but I can somewhat understand why she would be. I can't wait for the next chapter!
deleted92 chapter 3 . 8/25/2008
Hi there. Just a note to say I am very much enjoying your writing. You have a great command of the language. I like the character development and your alternate Hermione is really clever writing. I am not clear on what happened to the original 'potioned' Harry? Surely he would be the favored son/boyfriend since he's the proper harry for that timeline? That has to get reconciled somehow. I'm sure you have a plan! Anyway, nice job. Let's see more of Sirus interacting with HHr please? They may need a place to hide Harry2 so why not the grim old place?

cheers

RC
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