|Reviews for Bella California: Hello & Goodbye|
| mcutie chapter 19 . 1/28/2014
Omg i swear Bella is just so UGH! Just be with him already like jeez causing all the drama for no reason. Your a junior not a middle school little kid!. that wat i would say to her in real life :P i fet into theses stories to much
| ANONYMOUS chapter 1 . 3/30/2013
ok, you have a reasonable idea that I would totally read in a guilty pleasure way, but your characterisation is pretty awful. This is meant in an entirely constructive way sorry. I will also admit I've only read two chapters but I can't take anymore of bella. First of all I have an issue with bella and rose arriving in a limo, with only 2 people in it. First of all limos are tacky anyway and definitely not the kind of car I would see your bella arriving in. Also why are they then followed by an suv for their luggage which gets dropped of, but they are entirely capable of taking to their rooms in 1 trip... Back to my main problem with bella, you're suggesting, not very subtly, that she has confidence issues. First of all she has loads of money and everyone was taking notice of her arrival, so she's not feeling insecure in that way and then if she's feeling insecure because of her looks she would not describe a dress hitting all the right curves on her body. Your characters and the situation you are trying to build are ok, but in trying to be very teenage dream here's bella with everything any teenager would want (actress potential, rich and eventually getting an edward) you're creating a perfect environment with a flawed character which can't be accounted for. Ok the reviews I read indicate a sexual assault by james, but if that was so all of her actions would reflect that, not just an occasional look in the mirror and I suddenly remember that I was horrifically assaulted at a young age... I hope you have gathered my point from this essay. Your story has merit, you just need to think about what you're making your characters do and say and make them fit.
| FreakyTwilightGirl chapter 23 . 1/23/2013
Aww! It's soo sweet that he sings to her in the phone! Luv this story!
| haha chapter 3 . 12/8/2012
| haha chapter 2 . 12/8/2012
hahaha! go bella!
| Alicia chapter 4 . 6/14/2011
Ok ur story is awesomeeeeeeee... dudette ur awesome. i mean no one could rite like u and i think this is worth publishing. Keep riting my fantasy...lol...gawd i must b a loner laughing at moi own jokes... lol... there i go again... (sign) anyway pls keep riting.
PS Wats going on with rosalie?/
| Caseyrose18 chapter 14 . 10/26/2010
hahaha yay im glad Casey is nice cuz its my name and all and i was sad she was mean ! lol nice story btw
| Bree Manor chapter 1 . 8/22/2010
Loved it. I loved the way you made bella and rosalie TWINS, and the way u made edward nd alice TWINS. hope to read more
| KATxC chapter 13 . 8/1/2010
i liked your story up until i found out they were only 14... If James raped a girl and was sent to juve he would have at least had to stay for two years making him 12 when he raped someone... now correct me if i'm wrong but that is just a little messed up
Don't get me wrong I like the story but i would suggest making the characters at least two or three years older..
it would make more sense; And in the beginning of the story Bella agrees with rose about not having to endure much more time left in school, but if they are only 14 wouldn't that mean 3-4 more years?
It just doesn't make sense...
| Butterflies-LastForever chapter 13 . 7/22/2010
i love this chaapter amazing almost started crying
| deniche chapter 30 . 7/9/2010
Amazing story ! Congrats
| ooh i have an idea chapter 27 . 6/29/2010
what about SABR pronounced saber...
| Nellyx chapter 8 . 5/24/2010
aaawwww its soooo cuteu need more fighting and maybe a cool, cute llooveee scene
| Nellyx chapter 7 . 5/24/2010
SOUNDSSS GRREEAAATTT im going to read the next chapter ow. x
| Nellyx chapter 6 . 5/24/2010
ur stories really great. x