Reviews for Pokémon Amatheryst
MonfernoFreak chapter 1 . 7/28/2012
Name: Zayn Roughenhimer

Age: 11 (Has just come from his first region journey)

Gender: Male

Side: White (I'm evil :3)

Stater Pokemon: Chimchar (Plz make him evolve! Just to Monferno though.)

Region: Sinnoh

Looks: Black skinnys, white top and a grey over jacket with a hoodie, still showing the white top. Brown hair that goes to his eyebrows, nearly the bottom of his ears and goes blonde in the light. He has navy blue eyes that suit him.

Anthing else: He has a very bossy and tempered sister who's 9, just about to start her Pokemon journey an adores Piplup. She wear's a white dress that poofs out at the bottom, a dark green ribbon around her waist and dark green leggings underneath her skirt. She where's an emerald necklace to go with her emerald eyes, and her blonde-brown hair goes perfectly with it. A green headband sits on top of her head, her fringe flicking to the side and the rest of her hair let down. Even though Zayn hates her sister Izzy he will go to the end of the world for her, he's just that kind of person.
RabidSonicFan chapter 11 . 5/8/2012
This isn't random parody at all!

Anime Kyuubi96 chapter 1 . 8/8/2010
I wanted to create a character so here.





Starter Pokemon:Chimchar(Male)


Looks:Dark brown hair,black shirt,red jacket with a pokeball logo in the left side,blue jeans and red shoes.

Anything else:Medium height,Medium weight,kind,joking,calm,smart and a little bit shy.
SkyeGavin chapter 1 . 9/29/2009
This is a warning.

Entries Not allowed:

5. Any form of interactive entry: choose your adventure, second person/you based, Q&As, and etc. (OC submission)
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 10 . 5/25/2009
Ah, you take PMs to reviews. Alrighty. I'll be sending you a PM soon enough, so keep your eyes open!
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 9 . 5/25/2009
Very good. Your battle scenes are improving greatly. A little odd how the dancers helped them out, but believable. However, don't you think three continuous matches would tire Star and Arkanin's pokemon too much?
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 8 . 5/25/2009
Another blunt little girlie. *smiles* This was a very cute chapter.
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 7 . 5/25/2009
A refreshing new look, but try to add more outside of the battle. That will make this chapter stnad out and apart from the previous one.
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 6 . 5/25/2009
Interesting! Faulkner kind of appeared out of nowhere, though. And is "Bounce" a real attack move?

The end was a little odd... I don't know why Wrath would be mad at Jack and not Gabe, but oh well! Nice job on the battle scene, by the way.
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 5 . 5/25/2009
Hmm... the battle scene was a little confusing, but otherwise not bad.

Nothing much to comment on, except you tend to get repetative with your intros.
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 4 . 5/25/2009
*laughs* You're a funny person!

I like how you told things from Wrath's POV. Again, try to add more description - it'll make the story more dramatic.
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 3 . 5/25/2009
Jack's gaining quite the group, isn't he?

You've distinguished between everyone's personalities more, which is good. However, Star's personality has a dramatic shift from apologetic to stubborn. Try being more subtle.
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 2 . 5/25/2009
Cute! You write in passive voice a lot, when you should be writing in the active voice. For example:

"Into the air the Pokéballs went and out came Jack's Totodile, a Staraptor from Naomi and a Grovyle from Zero."

You might want to rewrite it as:

"Three Pokeballs flew into the air, unleashing the teens' pokemon in a glare of red light. Jack's Totodile was first to form from the light, before Jack could see that Naomi had a Staraptor, while the Grovyle was standing protectively near Zero."

That adds a bit more description, too. Just try and flesh out your paragraphs so they don't sound repetative.

Oh yeah, FYI: the data in the review before excluded your character, Jack, and Wrath and Zero, since they didn't show up in the reviews.
Tomoyo Kinomoto chapter 1 . 5/25/2009
*laughs* Nice start! I wonder what prevented Jack from starting his journey at the age of 10? A little rough around the edges, but nevertheless an intreguing fic.

I hope I'm not too late to submit a character. So, I wanted to give you a character that would add to your fic, and not be repetative. To do that, I looked at all the other submitted characters and came up with the information below. (Now's the fun part where I get to bombard you with lots of information!)

You have:

8 malesand 7 females

4 blacks, 2 neutrals, and 9 whites

5 Kanto people,3 Johtopeople, 1 Hoennperson, and 6 Sinnoh people

The average age is 13.6, while the male average is 13.875, the female average is about 13.286.

For Pokemon, there are 5 water types, 5 fire, 1 grass, 2 electric, 2 flying, and 4 normal.


Anyway, I just wanted to give you a heads up, since I've decided from this information to read the entire story before creating a person. Plus, it's fun making people's heads spin! .

Hope you still have room!
Ventiwings chapter 2 . 4/10/2009
Hm...I was bored and playing around with Pokemon made me want create a new character. lol. So here it is!

Name: Ray

Age: 17

Gender: Male

Side: Neutral

Starter Pokemon: Vaporeon (Shirely)

Region: Kanto

Looks: Tall, brown messy hair, dark blue eyes. Wears a blue short sleeved jacket with a dark navy sweatshirt underneath along with brown baggy shorts.

Anything Else: happy-go-lucky cheerful 24/7 when he wants to be, in battle he turns all serious and just loves to catch his opponents off guard with his Vaporeon. He names Pokemon after video game characters (ie. Shirley is a character from ToL). Also, he's been friends with Star since she was younger, tending to joke around her, but also has some sort of rivalry with her. (Fire vs. Water. lol)

Anyways...let's just make him suddenly appear at the contest. lol. I make such long descriptions I notice. Also, don't question on why I did this, I told you, I was bored.
62 | Page 1 2 3 4 .. Last Next »