|Reviews for Perfect World|
| AmanitaMuscaria chapter 1 . 2/11/2009
This is lovely. I like the small incidentals, like Lily throwing up on Sirius' shoes, and Peter being distracted.
A calm moment, as captured in the snow globe, before all that we know is coming - a well-wrought image.
| ElvendorkLuVer chapter 1 . 1/11/2009
I luv it!
| twilightscallingme chapter 1 . 9/13/2008
This was so beautiful in many ways. My favorite quote was by my favorite character, naturally -
“He’d better not be. How can you call a girl Sirius?”
I think you got the characters down to a T. And, the ending was perfect. great job.
| Mary Gooby chapter 1 . 9/5/2008
Aw, that was fantastic!
G2G, my computer's leaking onion juice, my eyes hurt when I look at it.
| Fed up with this crap chapter 1 . 9/2/2008
Siria? *rotflmao* that's cute and sweet.
| Cassandra's Cross chapter 1 . 9/1/2008
Oh, I am SO far behind in my reading and reviewing! Sorry about that, but this weekend has been unbelievably hectic. This was very bittersweet. It was a long, long time before Harry knew that 'perfect world,' wasn't it? If indeed he ever did. I've often thought Harry's memories would have prevented him from ever believing in or being able to fully enjoy life. Ah, well. Nicely done, Katy.
| mustardgirl1128 chapter 1 . 8/29/2008
Beautiful! And-gasp-NO WEASLEYS! LOL.
Anyway, I loved this! Sirius Remus Peter Potter? Hahahahah. That was hilarious. Very sweet-I loved how you made their friendship part of a perfect little world, and I loved Lily throwing up on Sirius's shoes-gross, but funny. :) Great job, this was fantastic!
| GoddessofYouth chapter 1 . 8/29/2008
That's so moving!
| silverbirch chapter 1 . 8/29/2008
It was lovely. So sad, but so lovely. You caught the characters without the silliness and cliche that goes with them normally.
| McFlyFan101 chapter 1 . 8/29/2008
Sirius Remus Peter Potter? I'm glad they didn't call him that! XD Really cute story
| Laughing Luna chapter 1 . 8/29/2008
That was so cute! You should write more Lily. You did a great job with her.
| Lexie-H chapter 1 . 8/29/2008
Oh wow, Katy. This is beautiful. You describe pregnancy in a way I expect only a mother could (I myself obviously have no idea, and was spellbound...)
I love the serenity that seems present in everything Lily sees... even if she isn't blooming, like Alice, I can certainly imagine a quiet glow, as she sits by the fire )
The snowglobe is a lovely touch, and I especially liked the way you undercut everything at the end, with the boys being called away - and yet your tone remained consistent, almost dreamlike.
I really, really loved this.
I did notice a few things though (here comes the concrit!):
1. You've misspelt 'friends' in the summary that I received with my email. I don't know if this has already been fixed, but if not, I'd certainly check that out...
2. "he is more wary of this than he was since he suggested" - this is a VERY baffling way to word your sentence. I get essentially what you're trying to say, but if feels clumsy, and I had to re-read it a few times to make sense of it. I suggest you remove the "of this than he was" part - and also, changing 'he suggested' to 'his suggestion', because saying "He is more wary since his suggestion of ice cream and ketchup" - or even better, "He has been more wary since his suggestion of ice cream and ketchup" ! - maintains the basic idea you're trying to convey without complicating it with unnecessary words... ?
3. Again, a simple question of word choice: "insulated from the world outside by the curtains" - insulated stumped me for a second. Of course, the image is perfectly sound, but I had to stop and think about it for a moment because it jarred me a little. Perhaps that's just me, and if so, please ignore! but it did occur to me that 'isolated' would also work quite well and didn't seem so ... unexpected?
Just three little things! I hope they're of mild help )
I really, truly love this, and you KNOW what a big fan of these characters I am (I had to laugh at you throwing a Prewett in at the end - couldn't resist, eh?)
| Noonesafe chapter 1 . 8/29/2008
Wow. Your description was really good! I really got the feeling of a perfect little world!
| Gaby Black chapter 1 . 8/29/2008
I was excited to see what you were going to do with my favourite characters.
I loved their different reactions to Lily's pregnancy - how Peter is embarrassed and Sirius teases her, and Remus tries to cheer her up.
“He’d better not be. How can you call a girl Sirius?” he demands.
He he this made me laugh; that's so Sirius.
I really liked the image of the snow globe and the general atmosphere you created. This was a lovely piece, Katy, and I think you did really great for your first time writing Lily, and second time for the Marauders.
| respitechristopher chapter 1 . 8/28/2008
Ah, a Lily with a sense of humor. How wonderful. The allegory of the snow globe was well done, and the foreshadowing was perfect - leaving it up to the canon your readers already know.
Your Sirius has great energy, and seems quite well behaved. The interplay between the boys came off nicely. I enjoyed this opening, and it looks as though you've got a wonderful little story brewing here. Looking forward to more.