|Reviews for No More Tears to Shed|
| Cici chapter 4 . 12/15/2012
Um... I have a question, in chapter 4, in the beginning it says that VAMPIRE Bella WOKE UP, ATE BREAKFAST, AAANNNDDD then felt WIDE AWAKE! Can u change that? I have a problem, and if u don't I'm gonna explode! (don't worry about my 'problem' I'm just a little mental. By mental I mean my thoughts go as fast as a vampire's!)
| Guest chapter 8 . 8/11/2012
It's the girl that the voltori came after
| Nyx'sReincarnation chapter 24 . 6/24/2012
Amazing story! I took notes and most of them are good.
Firstly, thank you sooooo much for writing "prologue" in stead of "preface". That's what it is, but a lot of the stories that I'm reading these days don't have that.
I think you could take the beginning of the story a bit slower. It just seems a bit rushed to me...
In chapter 4, she woke up? ... enough said.
I like that you can write long chapters even though you shorten them part of the way thorugh the story. I just figured out how to do longer ones... I wrote one for FP that was 13 pages!
Well... this one is usually something that I'm not picky on, but I had to mention it because it's that obvious. "...and said three important words that two weeks ago I thought I would've never said again in my life. "I Love You, Edward."..." … that's four words...
It's funny how you call them "yucky author's notes"... LOL
It's good that she doesn't completely abandon her career as soon as she finds the Cullens again.
when you're writing anything a sentence with "and" in it, you don't put a comma (,) before the "and". It's not propper... erm... grammar?
I didn’t notice any weird mistakes where something happens and then the person who it happened to goes and asks about it a few days later.
about the songs... (I'm a huge singer!) I'm surprised to notice that I actually know two of them! Every Time We Touch and White Horse. They're good songs.
I like that Jane is different. She's known as deadly in the books, so it's nice that she actually is nice here. The only thing is, when the family is complaining about losing her to Jane they all sound like babies.
Well... I think that's about it. I didn't check this for spelling...
If anything came off as harsh I'm sorry. Let me know if it did... I'm working on it.
Keep up the great work! :) (:
| SYWAF137 chapter 25 . 3/25/2010
i love it, but i would have liked a little bit of the werewolves in it. Other than that, AMAZING!
| Persephone Crying chapter 3 . 9/23/2009
i think explaining every single song line about how it relates to the cullens was stupid.
put some faith into what your writing, and let your readers read between the lines. because you trying to explain it at every turn kinda put me off the story a little (i'll keep reading. just for future reference. if you use a song, let us figure it out)
| JustAPoisonApple chapter 3 . 8/20/2009
um.. just with the song, White Houses- don't put an explanation at the end of every line. It's really obvious what it's about.
| JustAPoisonApple chapter 2 . 8/20/2009
I really like your story. I know it's been done before, but you've written it in a really original way.
However, this one sentence really bothers me.
"As soon as I said I had an idea… The Cullens! They would help me get used to being a vampire. To control my thirst, and find out my power!"
I just think it's really cliché. There are too many short sentences and you have two exclamation points, what 5cm away from each other? I just think you could write it better. Actually this whole chapter could probably use a re-read. Its all just that little cliché. I dunno. See what you can do with it.
Oh! P.S there is a chance Bella might not have a power- in BD she even doubted it herself. I just don't think you should have her presume she's gunna have a power.
| melibaskie chapter 1 . 8/8/2009
that was very good.
| badgirlrobin chapter 17 . 6/20/2009
ok, have another question: in an earlier chapter you had Bella "wake up" and I thought that maybe this is an AU and in your plot vampires sleep... but in this chapter you say they don't sleep... don't get me wrong, I love the story, it just struck me funny that's all. Thanks for sharing!
| badgirlrobin chapter 7 . 6/20/2009
I am a bit confused, I thought Emmett raced Bella to her house with everybody in tow, but then you have them go back to their house to meet them? did they leave and go back without meeting Elizabeth and Dan? did i miss something?
| YukaoruSena chapter 25 . 6/13/2009
That was really good, if I do say so myself. I LOVE music so it was cool to think of Bella as a singer. I'm happy that everything worked out for everyone. Happy endings are always better anyway. I thought it was pretty cool that Jane was Bella's friend from before. It was nice to think that Jane wasn't a bad person. And now she has her happy ending with Shane, which was such a great guy, too. I really liked him a lot. So by a long shot, excellent job! Loves, hugs, and Cullens!
| HyperActiveFreak17 chapter 25 . 6/7/2009
awesome story. I wish that more people would write like you. Using the whole bella got changed when edward left story line. I would absolutely love to read more of your stories, so you better get to writing! thanks for adding this completely breathtaking story for all of us twilighters! :)
| Fluffy101 chapter 25 . 5/24/2009
very good story. its one of my top 10 favorite fanfics. which place is it in? well well see after i read your other book...
| bonecolouredskin chapter 1 . 5/23/2009
| MyDarkHeart chapter 19 . 5/19/2009
I love that song I luv it iluv it! Ep! Pleasde excuse my embarrasing shreik! Lolz