Reviews for Tears
dancingonthestars chapter 8 . 6/12/2014
Ugh, please finish this. -dies-

Waiting,

-Star Dancer
Assassinforhire2 chapter 6 . 4/21/2013
This chapter was really good!
Assassinforhire2 chapter 5 . 4/21/2013
L is so blunt. XD
Assassinforhire2 chapter 4 . 4/21/2013
No! L Y U so Mean?
Assassinforhire2 chapter 3 . 4/21/2013
No! Mello! Keep the baby! Dang it L! Why do you have to be so mean?
Guest chapter 8 . 4/1/2013
Sooo... somewhere in the middle of the chapters the time went 4-5 month forward I assume? First Mello has been pregnant under I day and next he has a round belly? I must say, you have won the most Illogical- and jumpy-story award...
And in the summary it says this is completed but here you say this should have couple more chapters?
La Rosa chapter 6 . 4/1/2013
"You'll make air harder to reach the baby if you keep doing this" ? Oh my god I'm laughing so hard I can't breathe! XD Please tell me you're joking here... that you don't really believe that...
Guest chapter 6 . 4/1/2013
L was thinking 10 years back. That would make Matt 10 years old. Then all of a sudden 5 flashback years later Matt is 13? So he's 18 now. Then it should have been "18 years ago" in the last chapter (or 19 because Matt wasn't born right away...) Don't just write something that sounds good, make sure it follows the plot...
Do you even know your own story? These kind of things give the reader the idea that you yourself don't know the plot...
Carley chapter 3 . 4/1/2013
Me again _
Just so you know, pregnancy can only show in a test after at least 1 week after the "conception" which doesn't even happen right after sex (in your story it has only been like 12 hours...). Usually it takes at least 2 weeks and before 4 weeks/ 1 month the pregnancy has 50% chance of failing and it's totally natural. So you can't be sure if you're going to have a baby or not before 4 weeks have passed since conception.
So, nobody can even know if Mello is pregnant or not and it's stupid to ask about abortion when Mello can still take "morning after pill".
(And why is Matt asking about Mello not telling him about the pregnancy? Mello was informed and he passed out. When in the world would he have had time to tell Matt? And that "when I first found out about it" (like what, an hour ago?) made my day XD ) Seriously, you should have written the word crack-fic in the summary...
Carley chapter 2 . 4/1/2013
I know this is a Mpreg fic, but it's no reason to do bad research about the subject you're writing about. I understand if you create totally own stages and everything for pregnant males, but don't use stereotypical things about normal pregnancies if you have no clue what you're writing about. I also hate illogical scenes in stories and illogical assumption the characters make.
1) Who would just be okay and continue eating after throwing up? A normal person would assume that it's because they're sick and go to rest.
2) Who would automatically think a male would be pregnant? There are many sicknesses and diseases that make you weak for strong smells and make you throw up.
I'm not saying this is a bad fanfic, but it's not very fun to read when everything is just weird and illogical for no apparent reason. You even made it clear that you are using normal pregnancy as a source but clearly you have no real knowledge of this topic.
I still like this story, though. I have read many fics far worse, at least this is written nicely and doesn't have a million misspelled words like these kind of fics usually have. I'm not trying to offend you, just make sure to do proper research about the subject you're going to write about. Or create everything on your own and make it obvious that it's coming from your own imagination.
onixxfilth chapter 8 . 12/31/2012
Aww, cute story! Keep up the awesome work!
Loveless Daya chapter 8 . 9/11/2012
Well...your fic let me with mouth open :) Is so awesome, how did get the ideea that Matt is L's child, and with Kira. Well done :)
ViKsAtA chapter 8 . 1/16/2012
Oh Jesus Christ! Kyahahahaha... I can't believe it! Continue pls?
XTsunamiOfFireX chapter 8 . 11/30/2010
more write more please!
crispybutts chapter 8 . 11/3/2010
you must update!
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