Reviews for Seeds of Change
Vlonlin chapter 12 . 4/29/2009
Ooh, ow. Looks like Rose may be in a bit of trouble. I am a little bit confused as to what's going on and who is who, but I'll try going back and reading it a second time to get it. This stuff with the swamp doesn't sound good...and I'm not sure if I like this Max character.
Vlonlin chapter 11 . 4/15/2009
Oh dear-the plot thickens. It sounds like the group has quite a fight ahead of them.
Targaryen Muse chapter 9 . 4/15/2009
Nice bickering in the group. As far as characters go, right now Quancy's story is holding me pretty well. I like his dialogue, his character seems pretty steady and assassins are always fun. This fight scene was so much better than the earlier one with Danae, I got through it fine.
Targaryen Muse chapter 8 . 4/15/2009
Okay, the beginning of that chapter kind of shocked me, but it was still pretty cool. Still a few grammar problems with question marks, but the dialogue seems otherwise fine, same as the other chapters. Hooray for continuing one of the plotlines I really wanted to see, though! Enjoyed the ending part.
Targaryen Muse chapter 7 . 4/15/2009
Cool, some more action and a little more intrigue. Still curious about what's happening with some of the other characters, but it's your story so tell it at your pace. The rogue was a pretty interesting character, I enjoyed reading his musings and remembrances in the earlier part of the chapter.
Targaryen Muse chapter 6 . 4/15/2009
Hm, more characters. Always fascinating. This story keeps growing and growing, that's a good thing by the way, I like it. A couple of punctuation and grammatical things threw me off, but that's no big problem, since the story's interesting enough. I like the new character of Shan...he seems rather off for the stereotype of a Mystran, and that's also really good.
Targaryen Muse chapter 5 . 4/15/2009
Great, a meeting between main characters. Three of them, in fact. Considering that Tunsater's already familiar with Ojas and that crew, its cool that more and more people are converging. Some of these OCs are pretty interesting; the ones that interest me most are Tunaster, Rose, and Ojas. Rose displays her youth quite obviously throughout the story; Ojas, not so much, but he's still interesting. But what's cool about Rose is that she has a mostly blank slate to write her story on.
Targaryen Muse chapter 4 . 4/15/2009
I hope you're weaving all these storylines together, it'll be interesting to see how you'll do it. One small thing -fight scenes read better if split up into shorter paragraphs that define the different movements. And there's a few comma placements in the fight that might be helpful: i.e., "the creature to her left grinned(,) revealing a mouth..." and "Taking a long step backwards(,) she swept her..."

On another note, its good to see a Tunaster segment. Tantalizing. Mystra's Sacred Trust...I'm unfamiliar with that, look forward to seeing what's really happening with that faith.
Targaryen Muse chapter 3 . 4/15/2009
Hmm...I like the intrigue that's happening with Tunaster. This whole business with Captain Veera is interesting, haven't heard much about the character but a lot seems to center around her at the moment. The accents are a bit off putting, but perhaps that's just a personal pet peeve of mine.
Vlonlin chapter 10 . 3/29/2009
A very good chapter. I'm with Quancy on this one-I do not think it was Mystra's hand that touched the man at all. Now I really want to know what's going on and who's behind this. Now there's this Arthas involved, and I'm curious as to who he is too. So many questions, so few brain cells of mine left...
Vlonlin chapter 9 . 3/28/2009
The orb is worrying, and it seems like there may be trouble with it in the future. I'm definitely getting the feeling there's way more there than meets the eye. I'm also curious about what happened with those others like Trysh, why they went mad. All in all, it's a good ending that leaves a lot of questions-which will hopefully be revealed to us curious readers soon.
Vlonlin chapter 8 . 3/4/2009
Okay, the beginning of Chapter 8 was kind of confusing for me-it took my mind a second to catch up. However, after that cerebral stumbling of mine, it definitely started to pick up momentum now that I get the feeling things are starting to come together. Tryshra definitely seems to have issues, and I'm not sure if I want to know about that mysterious penance (well, I do, but I'm slightly hesitant). And the Captain shows up again, if only briefly. Yay!

All in all, a very good chapter other than the fact that I feel like I've missed something somewhere along the way.
Vlonlin chapter 7 . 2/28/2009
It would seem Rose has just gotten herself into trouble by saving Shan. He certainly isn't what I would expect of a cleric, and is definitely up to something. I'm curious to know how Quancy's gotten involved and what's going to happen to him, but he is a minor character at present. Again, it's plain that all is not well at the Temple of Mystra. Very thought-provoking.
Vlonlin chapter 6 . 2/26/2009
Just what is Shan up to? He seems quite the slippery character. All is definitely not as it should be at this particular temple of Mystra. This whole Sacred Trust thing sounds suspicious. Very interesting, though.
Vlonlin chapter 5 . 2/25/2009
The story is definitely interesting, and I like the fact that there are multiple story lines that slowly converge. I'm definitely curious to see what happened to the captain. It can be a little confusing at some points with the jumping around without much warning (inserting a line or having some indication that it's switched to focusing on a different character), but I have very few other complaints. There are a couple places where words were left out or there were some issues with those pesky commas. Still, other than those minor things, it's shaping up very well. I look forward to reading the next part.
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