|Reviews for Naruto: Captured|
| MartianGod chapter 5 . 4/28
on your parting shot: preach! this is why I hate Kakashi and why most people think he is a terrible teacher.
| Steve chapter 5 . 4/28
Naruto is still a simp
| Sarcasm Dragon chapter 11 . 4/28
Up to this chapter the story is pretty good. It's not the best writing, it could use more description and in places there could be more "show" than "tell", but it's enjoyable.
Unfortunately, the character bashing that takes place here definitely hurts the quality.
Having the "remedial" course make better ninja than ninja with jounin instructors already strains credulity (I mean, why in the world would a ninja village want their "elites" to get inferior training?), but what you did to Sasuke absolutely breaks the suspension of disbelief.
You turned Sasuke into fresh-graduate Sakura in terms of conditioning and skills.
If in 6-8 months the remedial program produced those results it would be insane not to have all genin go through the same process. Sure, you lampshaded that with Sarutobi saying "the clans veto the idea" but why would the clans want their kids so handicapped?
It would have been more realistic if Sasuke had fallen somewhat behind Naruto, not be ridiculously outclassed. Having Sakura even coming even to him would still be shocking and still show the massive gains the remedial program teaches.
Then there is the approach you had the team take towards "welcoming" Sasuke. There is no way that would work, and no they would think it would work.
A better approach would be to show Sakura and Naruto trying to integrate Sasuke into their team, but Sasuke being a dick about it and resentful of their progress. Sakura would initially have some kind feeling about Sasuke but his own behavior would turn her off. Justify their dislike by his failures to work with them, not justify his antipathy by their failure to try to bring him into the team.
I expect by now you have grown as a writer, so if you are reading this review, maybe take a look at this chapter and use it as a reminder to think from the perspective of the characters-and consider if that is a rational perspective-rather than from the author's view.
Anyway, I'll continue reading. I hope the rest of the story is more like the first ten and less like this one.
| kekbekmekflekwek chapter 26 . 1/28
Damn, I assume you abandoned this, eh? This chapter was fucking awful. Full of you switching tenses back and forth. Guess you just shit this out and gave up. What a fucking waste of an amazing story.
| Abyssal Angel chapter 17 . 1/7
I'm... sorry? Next chapter better have a doozy of an explanation for how Gato and an army of thugs successfully killed Zabuza, cause that nearly destroyed my sense of disbelief by itself.
| EtheriousLogia chapter 26 . 12/2/2020
update plz so good
| Boomshanka chapter 21 . 10/4/2020
So Gato ran away?
| DiveLord chapter 21 . 10/4/2020
Why is Haku suddenly unable to walk on water? Ice user trained by Zabuza, water should be his bitch. Walk on it, freeze it, use the ambient moisture to launch a wave of icy death. If Haku only missed the bastard by minutes and wasn’t willing to get on the water to pursue him, I guess he didn’t want revenge that badly after all.
| Guest chapter 24 . 9/14/2020
Man i gotta say your naruto feels like nothing but a side character who is just there to hand his ass to everyone(sakura!, choji!, and finally gaara) and not to mention the story is mostly narated from sakura, their sensei yugao and other guys like rooster. And his self erespect seems really low to me like the way he just goes around following orders from his team mates and refers with utter respect to his peers, i got it that this is an au but still this character doesnt suit naruto, makes him look pathetic.
I dont really comment on stories but this is one of the best i have ever read and it pisses me off how you ignored naruto's thoughts, we never much get to see what he feels about situations he is going thru and if we do it just makes me feel how dumb he is.
Maybe u arent naruto fan but some of us are.
| WHCnelson chapter 11 . 8/25/2020
Great story. Update more
| sakurakagome chapter 26 . 7/22/2020
Hi, I really enjoy this story and have reread it a few times now. I hope you are able to update soon.
| Priest chapter 26 . 7/16/2020
This has been a really interesting story sofar. I like how you go for a more realistic view of the military side of the whole Ninja Village thing that most people tend to ignore. As a veteran it is something I really appreciate when somebody does.
| SeikoTuNeR chapter 11 . 4/20/2020
This was fun reading until this chapter. I was hoping for a fair treatment of Sasuke but I guess not. I was hoping you were going to use earlyCanon! Sasuke where he was just a bit of a jerk and not this fanonized version of Sasuke where he is constantly insulting and stupidly arrogant. And after skimming some of the reviews, man, a lotta people HATE Sasuke. Ah well.
| megax 456 chapter 26 . 4/17/2020
esta muy buena la historia que mal que ya no subas mas caps
| Zabzab chapter 1 . 3/21/2020
You know re-reading this, the part where Sarutobi says "you didn't betray but I'm disappointed" really sounds weird. He says "you did nothing wrong you just followed orders" one minute and then "I'm disappointed you followed orders" the next. Very contradictory.