Reviews for Naruto: Captured
Chat Nihiliste chapter 26 . 4/28
It's a shame that you decided to leave this fic in the middle, please continue it!
Dracoessa Draga chapter 11 . 1/25
oh eff off UKE.
RFDN chapter 16 . 1/1
The concept for this story is interesting. Have Naruto caught trying to steal the forbidden scroll of seals. Then you have him be used as a sting operation for Danzo trying to recruit him for the Kyuubi. During the time he does the "revision year" forcing him to learn the skill to pass the academy.

There are many holes in this concept let alone implementation.
1. Why is the revision year teaching tree walking and water walking? This is suppose to be revision. This implies that the students would be getting caught up to the level expected to graduate. These chakra control exercises alone are greater than the training the student's received in the academy. I could see some lower chakra cost exercises, the physical conditioning, and training on soft skills but these two techniques and the ninjutsu being taught make it seem like everyone will graduate and be at around what we expect as rookie Chuunin level skill.
2. What are you doing with Charka levels? I know this is a common trend with many fanfiction both before and after this story was written but why can Sakura use water walking before the shippuden timeline? We know that she could only run up a tree once using her chakra in the method of the tree walking exercise during the wave mission. I get the lines you made about her working out improving her reserves because she has more physical energy but honestly this is over a 40x increase in her chakra levels with more physical training for 3 months from just the tree walking training shown in the story. If that type of growth is possible then either once you hit a certain level of fitness you have the same reserves as everyone else or anyone can grow their chakra reserves by leaps and bounds. The both options runs contrary to everything we see in the manga/anime.
3. How did the embezzlement never get caught before this point? The reports for these incidents were used for claims against the treasury. Financial reports would have been created at minimum once a year and with how large the damages paid out are implied to be it would have been flagged as something to look into. This should have been caught years ago unless Danzo had agents who were suppressing this financial information from being seen by any non corrupt part of the treasury. If Danzo did have agents who could completely stop that financial information from becoming known yet still have it paid out then there is on need to do so for funding.
4. Why would the "revision year" conditioning not be done in the final year of the academy? I am not meaning the emotional conditioning but the physical conditioning. The obstacle course is said to be on the academy grounds. The workouts are said to be done on the academy grounds. Even the chakra control exercises that don't makes sense for them learning are done on the academy grounds. These are all stated to be at the academy, not a secondary facility but the academy they have attended for 4-6 years prior to this "revision year". If the resources are here and they can give such good results then why not use then before this?
5. Why would anyone believe that Naruto was going to be sent outside of Kohona's control. He is the greatest military asset the village has, at his worst he is a large scale bomb that can be sent into enemy lands at the cost of his life by breaking his seal in a way to release the Kyuubi. At best he is the super soldier who can use multitudes of large scale techniques to slaughter armies singlehandedly, outlast all but other demon containers in battles of attrition and Destroy other villages in surprise attacks. It would be more likely that he would have the Kyuubi extracted from him and put into another child to try getting a more useful soldier in time than waste him in this way. Even just keeping him as a civilian in jail keeping the Kyuubi contained makes more sense than having another village have the chance to get the Kyuubi by killing him and having it reform over time or just capturing him and extracting it.
6. Why are Military ninja a thing? Ninja are Kohona's military. Every ninja has their own specialties, they have an elemental affinity, different body types, different chakra levels and different mindsets. We have seen ninja's of every rank in Kohona by the end of the chuunin exams arc in the manga. No two ninja have standardized levels like the military ninja concept pushed in this fanfiction. The very concept of the ninja's only following orders is Root straight up. Every ninja shows discipline while on the clock even Naruto.

Now aside from the issues with the concept there are other trends in the story that don't make sense to me.

Why did you switch protagonists? We started with Naruto and then over the course of the root "Revison Year-Root" arc focus on Sakura. We hear her thoughts, see her moments and see her grow. As the chapters continue on Naruto becomes sidelined to a background character. We see the Third Hokage's views, Kakashi's views, Yuugao's views and even Sasuke's views more than Naruto's as time goes on. You don't have to have everything about Naruto but it is a noticeable change.

Why are they a team only reporting to the Hokage? We have no actual structure ever shown for being assigned missions or reporting mission in this fanfiction other than directly reporting to the Hokage. No mention was ever made of anything else even existing other than this line to imply they are better than other teams. If some other structure was even mentioned in passing in the story then maybe this would work, but the same thing they do can easily be done by just listing the team as working on category "" missions for ranks C-B. Just calling it a special team type and currently reserved for C rank and above missions would work just as well if not better than this vague proclamation of them being his personal team.
1.6180339887498948482045868 chapter 26 . 11/24/2021
I hope you keep this up eventually. This is officially one of my top 5 naruto fanfics.
istane99 chapter 26 . 8/1/2021
The story looks abandonned which is sad. I really enjoyed the plot here.
Also your writing style is enjoyable as well.
Amun565 chapter 10 . 7/4/2021
Awww man you are forcing the original team 7 together even after all the butterflies?
Mistress Saturn1 chapter 26 . 6/21/2021
Has this been abandoned?
shadewolfedrt chapter 26 . 6/14/2021
I hope that you are still writing for all of your work is great and would be missed.
Zeke chapter 26 . 6/14/2021
This was one of the best stories I have rea on here! Wish there was more.
MartianGod chapter 5 . 4/28/2021
on your parting shot: preach! this is why I hate Kakashi and why most people think he is a terrible teacher.
Steve chapter 5 . 4/28/2021
Naruto is still a simp
Sarcasm Dragon chapter 11 . 4/28/2021
Up to this chapter the story is pretty good. It's not the best writing, it could use more description and in places there could be more "show" than "tell", but it's enjoyable.

Unfortunately, the character bashing that takes place here definitely hurts the quality.

Having the "remedial" course make better ninja than ninja with jounin instructors already strains credulity (I mean, why in the world would a ninja village want their "elites" to get inferior training?), but what you did to Sasuke absolutely breaks the suspension of disbelief.

You turned Sasuke into fresh-graduate Sakura in terms of conditioning and skills.

If in 6-8 months the remedial program produced those results it would be insane not to have all genin go through the same process. Sure, you lampshaded that with Sarutobi saying "the clans veto the idea" but why would the clans want their kids so handicapped?

It would have been more realistic if Sasuke had fallen somewhat behind Naruto, not be ridiculously outclassed. Having Sakura even coming even to him would still be shocking and still show the massive gains the remedial program teaches.

Then there is the approach you had the team take towards "welcoming" Sasuke. There is no way that would work, and no they would think it would work.

A better approach would be to show Sakura and Naruto trying to integrate Sasuke into their team, but Sasuke being a dick about it and resentful of their progress. Sakura would initially have some kind feeling about Sasuke but his own behavior would turn her off. Justify their dislike by his failures to work with them, not justify his antipathy by their failure to try to bring him into the team.

I expect by now you have grown as a writer, so if you are reading this review, maybe take a look at this chapter and use it as a reminder to think from the perspective of the characters-and consider if that is a rational perspective-rather than from the author's view.

Anyway, I'll continue reading. I hope the rest of the story is more like the first ten and less like this one.
kekbekmekflekwek chapter 26 . 1/28/2021
Damn, I assume you abandoned this, eh? This chapter was fucking awful. Full of you switching tenses back and forth. Guess you just shit this out and gave up. What a fucking waste of an amazing story.
Abyssal Angel chapter 17 . 1/7/2021
I'm... sorry? Next chapter better have a doozy of an explanation for how Gato and an army of thugs successfully killed Zabuza, cause that nearly destroyed my sense of disbelief by itself.
EtheriousLogia chapter 26 . 12/2/2020
update plz so good
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