Reviews for Retaliation
Taechunsa chapter 7 . 9/4/2011
That was a pretty good story. I loved the end when Rick was sharing a cell with Lucretia. That was a riot.

Keep up the good work.
kaitlynchosenisme chapter 7 . 7/4/2011
ha ha! Rick finally gets whats coming to him. Josh becoming a sorta villian (who couldve seen that?) but then going straight. i love Joey and his parents. it's good to see they're continuing to go straight. Ron's finally getting some credit, that's always a good thing but Kim isnt left behind either. Han is the little sister to Yori, i've read it alot in stories but they all still rock! you're really good at this. v

-Kaitlyn
Reader101w chapter 7 . 4/5/2011
Great story,

It ties the previous stories nicely together and brings a conclusion to all of them.

It's poetic justice, having Rick bunking with Lucre.

Good for Josh that he is back on the good side, now let's hope he can stay there.

Keep up the very good writing that you do,

reader101w
LTAOZFAN chapter 7 . 11/22/2008
Oh, this is a good windup to this tale! Recoil is definitely smarter than Rick, and proves it by bailing out of Rick's team. As we learn, however, it doesn't solve anything, she winds up in the slammer all the same.

Nice bit of concealment here, with a young Japanese woman pretending to be an older Japanese woman! It also means that there's no problem with faking a Japanese accent. The business with the lady ninja not remembering Ron's name is a good touch. Saying Ron isn't so tough also reinforces Rick's belief that Ron isn't anybody important. (How wrong he is!)

The way you fill in the background of Rebecca and Rick by having Yori spell out who they are is good writing. It informs the reader and moves the plot along at the same time.

I like the way you include Rufus at the end of this story. The way Rick bulks up and warns that people shouldn't get him mad is right out of the TV series "The Incredible Hulk," and I just love it! The fact that Ron breaks Rick's nose again is a good touch, showing that even after all he's gone through Rick is still too dense to know that he's in over his head.

Sharing a prison cell with Frugal Lucre? Oh, that is a ghastly fate! The only thing I can think of that might be worse would be to have to listen to twelve hours of continuous reading of Vogon poetry. (See "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" for details.)

A very good conclusion to a very good story, sir, and an excellent ending to the story arc that began with "Fast Track." You have a real flair for doing enjoyable "Kim Possible" stories, and I'm glad that you are still writing them.

LTAOZFAN

"Them's my views, amen, so be it."

"Treasure Island," by R. L. Stevenson
LTAOZFAN chapter 6 . 11/20/2008
Bengal is definitely warped. He cannot accept the fact that he was beaten by a better fighter - Ron - and he wants to torment Kim along with getting revenge on Ron. Oh, yes, the money is good, but how long will he collect his salary? At least he has the decency to want to avoid hurting Shego or her baby, but still, he doesn't turn down the assassination assignment.

Bengal also is a bit dense when he thinks Global Justice is careless and stupid about guarding Drew, Sheila and Josh. Can't this guy even consider the possibility that since this looks too easy it probably is? Which means, it is a trap!

Yori and Ron really understand that Kim can take Bengal down in a fight, and he deserves to be defeated by Kim. And Kim pulls it off without any visible strain, even winning with a punch that doesn't need to land! Bengal, you are SO outclassed by Kim Possible!

Recoil having second thoughts, eh? If she was smarter she would have seen what a klutz Rick O'Shea is from the start, and never joined up. And it turns out that Bengal is smart enough to know that he'd better tell what he knows and get a safe place to spend the next thirty years. He may be warped but isn't really stupid, after all.

I think Kim has the right idea: Take the fight to the enemy, don't let him have time to rest & regroup. But the best way to do that is to make your enemy think he's the one taking the offensive and let him come into a prepared trap.

A nicely-done chapter, with a really satisfying battle between Kim and Bengal. You give us action in both camps to keep the interest up, with Kim, Ron and Yori right in character. Yes, I like the way this story unfolds.

LTAOZFAN

"Them's my views, amen, so be it."

"Treasure Island," by R. L. Stevenson
HarrylovesGinny09 chapter 6 . 11/19/2008
hi

it's me again. wow han is yori's sister? is yori going to be at the wedding? how many sequeles do u have?

Jackie
LTAOZFAN chapter 5 . 11/17/2008
The business with Professor Dementor is lovely! Getting foiled by Team Possible isn't so bad, it comes with the job of being a super villain. But to be told that The Good Guys consider him a soft target, suitable for breaking in new operators! Well! Even a villain has his pride, after all! But then Team Possible proves that Dementor isn't the toughest villain to beat. Poor Dementor, this must make him feel very blue.

So, Han really is Yori's little sister! Nice backstory for Yori, Sensei and Han, and the way Ron & his folks handle the news is equally good. (Sort of gives me a warm, fuzzy feeling.) This also establishes a legitamate reason for Yori to appear in your stories every so often. Good writing, that.

Rick O'Shea believes his computers are hacker-proof, does he? Just like the Germans thought that their Enigma code machine was unbreakable during World War II. (It wasn't.) And then Rick happens to give Wade and Global Justice a legal reason to hunt through Team Richochet's computer files. I like the way Kim & Friends keep their eyes on the fact that it isn't what they can learn about Rick that counts, but what they can learn about Rick and then use in court that matters.

The best way to lure somebody into a trap is to use something they really want as bait. And now Team Possible knows what Rick wants? Oh, what's gonna happen to Rick when he steps into this trap. (It couldn't happen to a nicer guy.)

Another good chapter, and clearly leading up to the climax. I must read on ASAP.

LTAOZFAN

"Them's my views, amen, so be it."

"Treasure Island," by R. L. Stevenson
LTAOZFAN chapter 4 . 11/15/2008
I will say it again: you write Yori very well in this story. She is clearly a highly capable ninja, and a good person to have on Kim & Ron's side of this battle of wits. Of course, having the assistance of a naked mole rat is a big plus! And the technical backup Wade provides is equally useful.

Rick O'Shea has a one-track mind and he is totally unable to switch tracks. That sort of one-way, one-track attitude can lead to a cornfield meet, in old railroading terms. That is, a head-on collision. Kim, Ron and their friends are closing in on Rick's operation and they clearly know how to use their skills to best advantage. Rick O'Shea is gonna go down, bigtime!

Tara is really very smart, and she is the sort of lady Josh ought to fall for. It looks like that is going to happen, and I hope it works out OK. At the same time, Recoil is probably the smartest member of Team Ricochet, and she knows it. Rick is really a dunce if he thinks Recoil is going to cuddle with him just because he caouldn't get cozy with Kim.

And now we have this new matter of Yori, Han, Ron and his parents. Just what does this mean? Nothing bad, I hope. But you are doing such a smooth and well-crafted tale that I'm not worried about something going sour.

Finally, I like the way you are writing this from the technical side. Smooth sentences, good spelling, and a carefully organized plot that keeps the reader interested. Good work, sir. I hope to see more of it.

LTAOZFAN

"Them's my views, amen, so be it."

"Treasure Island," by R. L. Stevenson
LTAOZFAN chapter 3 . 11/13/2008
That ring Josh wears to be powerful reminds me of The Ring. You know, "One ring to rule them all, one ring to find them... " When Josh wears that ring it hits him like a drug, and warps his mind while it makes him feel powerful. Spooky!

I like the reference to Josh and Ron having gone Trick or Treating from the TV episode "October 31st;" good tie-in, sir. And Josh finally realizes that he is being used. That's always bad news, because when people find out they're being used like this, they tend to turn and bite the user. Rick is in for trouble!

The encounter at the hospital is just right, and I love the way Hana cuts righ to the heart of the matter. She sums the whole sitch up in less than ten words, and Josh knows he's in the wrong. Kim's state is just right. She's not about to kill Josh at the moment, but if Ron dies Josh's life expectancy is going down like a gut-shot duck!

So, Rick O'Shea is really revealing his nastiness, now. And he recognizes why he is that way, but blames it on his father. His plan to cripple Ron in order to get Kim is grim, but I know it's not going to work, since Wade is on the case. And dumping Josh as a patsy is proof that Rick is stupid in spots. That only gives Josh another reason to want to demolish Rick.

You write Tara as being very intelligent as well as being sweet on Josh. Good point to make! Tara is not the stereotypical "blond and beautiful but dumb" character we see so often in fiction and films. Her plan is a good one, I'm sure of that.

Thanks for bringing Yori into the story, and in a sympathetic way. I don't really care for the fanfics that paint Yori as a deadly rival to Kim for Ron's affections, but you write her as a much better character. I think we will see more of Yori as this tale progresses.

Well, a very nice chapter that ends with a surprise. Rick has his plan, but Kim & Friends have their own plans, and they seem to be a couple of steps ahead of Rick. The next chapter should be very interesting reading.

LTAOZFAN

"Them's my views, amen, so be it."

"Treasure Island," by R. L. Stevenson
LTAOZFAN chapter 2 . 11/4/2008
Another well-written chapter, sir. I like the way Sheila calls on Kim & Ron when Drew is arrested. All those fights they had in the past really should make Sheila aware that when you need help Right Now, calling on Kim Possible is the best thing to do. The way Drew and Sheila are protective of each other is also good. Arguments aside, they are in love and care about each other.

Stink Free Diapers? Marvelous idea! Never mind trying to take over the world by force, just invent a product that every set of new parents will want, and you'll earn enough to buy the world instead. But Will Du just cannot imagine that "secret" does not equal "evil." Betty, WHY do you keep him in Global Justice?

The scene in which Kim, Ron and Sheila have a good workout and a lot of fun smashing the robots is a nice way to see our friends in action, and to show how Sheila has become an unofficial member of Team Possible. It is also worth noting that Rick O'Shea's plan to have the robots try to rescue Drew, but let Monk (Josh) stop them, might have worked if Ron, Kim & Sheila had not been on hand.

It's a bit sad how blinded by hate Josh is. Tara can see how Ron and Kim adore each other, and she's willing to accept it. I hope that by the end of this story Josh has reallized that a beautiful, caring, intelligent woman is right there for him. All he needs to do is to take off that muscle ring and think for himself.

And then we get a cliffhanger ending in which Ron is seriously hurt by Rick O'Shea's latest plot. If Kim finds out about this, Rick is in for a lot of trouble.

LTAOZFAN

"Them's my views, amen, so be it."

"Treasure Island," by R. L. Stevenson
LTAOZFAN chapter 1 . 11/1/2008
Well, Rick O'Shea is still running true to form: arrogant, greedy & stupid. Is he just trying to put Team Possible out of business and become famous as an "I can always save the world" sort of person, with revenge on Ron along the way, or is he out to emulate The Brain, and Try To Take Over The World? And Josh seems to be running with a blindfold on. He thinks that his appearance as a muscle-bound he-man makes him worthwhile. Tara must really care for Josh, if she is worried about what might happen to him.

I like the way Ron is concerned about catching Camille Leon so he can get back to his souffle. And the way Drew and Joey give Sheila a "look" to convince her not to object to their activities is both funny and appropriate. I suppose Drew got the idea from Kim, in some sort of way?

Camille pulls out a gun and shoots at Kim & Ron? Now that is rather unusual for a KP story. Thank goodness Kim's battlesuit has that shield power built into it.

Knowing Will Du's track record, it seems very likely that this arrest of Drew is a major mistake. Perhaps someone has set up phoney evidence pointing at Drew to hide some other person's activities? Could be.

A good start to the story! It looks as if a major clash between Kim & Ron on one hand and Rick O'Shea on the other is shaping up. Just what Rick has planned for Ron I don't know, but it won't be pleasant, I'm certain. You are good at cooking up a plotline, and in the writing out of the story as well. This looks to be another enjoyable addition to the world of Kim Possible.

LTAOZFAN

"Them's my views, amen, so be it."

"Treasure Island," by R. L. Stevenson
Donteatacowman chapter 7 . 10/8/2008
Great job! Lucre was in character, and a good job overall. I can't help empathizing a little with Rick...
Zaratan chapter 7 . 10/6/2008
Rick got played good. It was so bad, it was funny. And being stuck in a cell with Frugal Lucre... that's just cruel.

Hope to see further stories in this series.
Zaratan chapter 6 . 10/6/2008
Bengal blew it. Of course, it helps when Ron's mad disguise skills lead to Bengal's targets all being plants. lol

Eagerly awaiting more!
Samurai Crunchbird chapter 7 . 10/6/2008
Waveform,

This was a great ending to an excellent 'Fast Track' saga...that is, unless you have something planned for the upcoming nuptials.

Either way, this was a brilliant tale. It was an honor to read it.

Your friend in writing,

The Samurai Crunchbird
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