Reviews for visceral
Potterworm chapter 1 . 1/27/2010
Though I'm not sure I quite buy some of this stuff happening (Narcissa, really?) I really adored this story. It was very passionate and real.
lovetoseverus chapter 1 . 1/22/2009
This is really interesting to me in that it sort of fills in the background colors of Lily. Although I like her and James together in canon, I was always disappointed by the lack of information in the books about how her and James came to be an item, married and had a son. From Snape's Worst Memory, you learn that Lily and James were barely even on speaking terms during the year of their OWLS, and from The Prince's Tale you learn that Severus and Lily were childhood friends (which continued into their early years at Hogwarts). From there, I feel like readers must make a giant leap of imagination to guess why Lily and James ended up together.

Yet, even with the lack of information on Lily and James, I don't think it's a stretch at all to think Lily and Severus had something very deep, intense and unexplainable together - probably as close to a real relationship as Severus ever got - as there is plenty of evidence throughout the books to suggest this was the case. However, their coupling was doomed from the beginning due to this kind of disconnect that never quite reconciles itself in time (or at the same time) for each of them. To my delight, fanfic writers like exploring this very thing. Please continue with this pairing, I'd love to read more.
tauphe chapter 1 . 11/8/2008
This was great.

You showed Lily in a great light. So often people portray her as a perfect, angelic thing. Fics like that just aren't realistic.

Thank you.
zandra rose chapter 1 . 10/7/2008
Wow. That was a really awesome story. Great job.
madame-silver chapter 1 . 10/6/2008
That was great.

One of my favourite stories ive read on here for a while.

Thank you.
Carmen Echo chapter 1 . 10/4/2008
you've evolved. a cold and dispassionate and pedantic lily. very believable. and for snape to be a person who evokes something in her, also convincing. i imagined snape to be a certain way with lily, a way that he was with no one else and i saw it here. the constant questions (don't you lily) are a beautiful move. they imply doubt. so maybe she isnt as dispassionate as she would like to be. there are certain people, at certain times that make her exactly the opposite. narcissa - excellent. just because i'd always imagined lily to have dabbled in the wrong things with the wrong gender.
shyfoxling chapter 1 . 10/2/2008
Beautiful and powerful.
Artika chapter 1 . 10/2/2008
I am not a giant fan of stories in the second person, but I really enjoyed this. I love love love that Lily isn't perfect- that she's real. I can't stand the idea that she was an angel or a doormat or a goody-two-shoes. I find it much more interesting (and therefore heartbreaking) in instances such as the one you have written: she regrets severing ties with Snape and has human emotions instead of only happiness and pride.

Enough ranting-good story. I hope you do something more with these two - you have a good feel for them.
Aelia chapter 1 . 10/2/2008
I like your writing style. It is unique and quite good. Keep on writing!