|Reviews for The Syndicate|
| DEiDEiSASORi chapter 7 . 7/31/2014
OMG! THE AKATSUKi! i LiKE THE CONNECTiON BETWEEN SASORi AND SAKURA! i HOPE YOU UPDATE THiS SOON, CUZ iT'S BEEN FiVE YEARS...
| The Disappearing Me chapter 7 . 10/29/2009
I LOVE THIS FIC! YAY! It makes me happy... :) The quality of the writing, that is. It's got a lovely 1984 feel to it, which gives you brownie points as that happens to be one of my favorite books! :) Ah...I'm in SUCH a good mood now! YAY! This fic is SO well-written and multi-dimensional, and I have a feeling it'll be VERY twisty. My favorite quote from the whole thing, by the way, was “Sweet jumping kangaroo shit...” It made me laugh! :) Great job! Keep writing!
| RomanceIsMyDoom chapter 7 . 9/28/2009
What a creative story! I love it since it's scifi and something totally new! Keep up the great work :)
| bloocheeze chapter 1 . 9/22/2009
This is a very interesting concept you have here. I loved how you made their names like Uzumaki and Hyuuga into acronyms. Very good deliverance, but there were a few mistakes I caught...
I notice this with a lot of fanfics where the author ends their dialogue with a period and capital pronoun (or a word that's not the person's name). For example:
“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine.” He mumbled, trying not to appear too concerned.
“Naruto? NARUTO!” The woman in the car screamed as his beacon flickered.
“You too.” Came a sad reply, the dark-haired woman patted him on the shoulder.
It should be written as:
“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine,” he mumbled, trying not to appear too concerned.
“Naruto? NARUTO!” the woman in the car screamed as his beacon flickered.
“You too,” came a sad reply, the dark-haired woman patted him on the shoulder.
The words be spoken and the words describing who spoke are all one sentence.
Also, some things that confused me:
“I like Decoy better. It’s noble. Sakura it is!” I didn't understand what you meant by this sentence. Did you mean to say: “I like SAKURA better. It’s noble. Sakura it is!” Like that?
That didn’t stop him securing Sakura on the bottom of the car with special straps installed in the legspace, kicking open the door and jumping out of the moving vehicle to roll against the glass surface of the magroad.
Eh... this sentence was before Sakura was bestowed with a name, so I'm assuming you meant to put: That didn't stop him from securing the woman...(etc)
Overall, your story was well written. But do you reread it carefully once you're finished writing it? It would cut down a lot of little mistakes if you do. (or you could just get a beta.)
| atrociously beautiful chapter 7 . 9/20/2009
I thought the whole story rocked! Really you have such a unique plot i was litterally shocked. I really hope you update soon.
I've never read anything like this.
| inu-babygirl chapter 7 . 9/19/2009
it is gewtting good continue please INu
| Neon Genesis chapter 7 . 9/15/2009
Ooh, now I really want to read what happens next...!
But I will wait patiently for your next update. 'Cause I'm awesome like that. n_n
There were typos, but nothing awful. Your Sasuke in this universe is highly interesting and appealing. (I think I've said something along those lines in the past, but whatever.) And Sakura is easy to identify with. Yay for good characterizations! :)
You write dialogue very well, very realistically. Just thought I'd throw that out there.
I want to know more about this Sasori-Sakura thing... and, of course, more SasuSaku XD. But I always want more of my OTP, so it's probably not even worth mentioning.
At any rate, really great story you've got here. Very original and refreshing, as it seems that most of the stories in the Naruto archives these days are just the same old plots being recycled. (My own story included, but I like to overlook that. :P)
So, yes. Awesome. Heartheartloveheart.
| bcnxkdhjvb chapter 7 . 9/15/2009
Oh the wonderful drama.
Great chapter. Making me more and more curious.
| xXArtObbsesiveXx chapter 6 . 8/23/2009
wow...some morbid punishments in their, but strangley, i'm okay with it.
But now i'm to curious about what he needs Sasori for!
| Neon Genesis chapter 6 . 7/13/2009
I like this a lot. It's interesting and striking. And, of course, SasuSaku. Always a plus.
I love your Sasuke in here. And all of the little SasuSaku scenes - as well as the detail about all of this technology and the procedures and stuff. Most of it went over my head, but I appreciated how it made it seem that much more real.
Thank you for sharing.
| PrettiPanther chapter 1 . 6/28/2009
This story is great!
Also, this story is most like this
book called "Anthem" by Ayn Rand
you should read it i recommend it.
| x.X.x.X.xBabyboo294x.X.x.X.x chapter 6 . 5/7/2009
Wow! Tears are hell to shift from the carpet? hm...please ocntinue!
| silverymoonfire chapter 6 . 5/7/2009
| inu-babygirl chapter 6 . 5/7/2009
muahhahahah i like up-dte fast INu
| bcnxkdhjvb chapter 6 . 5/7/2009
I missed this story. Glad you updated! And loving your new pen-name, by the way.
Wish I had time to say more, but awesome chapter. Can't wait for the next one