|Reviews for Lovefools Part 1|
| Cat Avatar for the DCG chapter 25 . 9/9
I think this is really well characterized, and I thank you for sharing it with the rest of us. I'll have to join the dissenters with the gun-shot, but it didn't stop me from enjoying what you'd written.
Thank you for writing!
| RedRightReturn51 chapter 1 . 4/24
Really a shame this story only has a hundred something reviews. Your attention to detail is amazing and I really loved this story :)
| Min's awesomeness chapter 25 . 11/7/2014
Wow, I just started reading DBZ fanfiction and so far this has been really a pleasure to read! Well written and kept me glued to my laptop until I finished it...Thanks!
| I'm a Person chapter 25 . 8/27/2014
This was a fantastic story! It could use a little more romance, though. There were a few great moments that I loved - the stargazing bit, the hospital, in the car at the very end. I just wish there were more. Maybe having some more of Eighteen gazing at Krillin would have helped highlight their attraction. People can't help but stare at the person they're falling in love with. Eighteen's thoughts during the stargazing part did a lot to develop the romance, so more scenes like that would have shown the progression of their relationship more clearly. Even without many romantic scenes, though, Eighteen's growth from beginning to end, and her acceptance of herself, was very touching and well written.
The way you came up with names for Seventeen and Eighteen was very creative and well thought out! Like everything fit into place perfectly. I was so impressed!
I hope you're still working on part 2. I'm sure it will be even better :)
| Fly Dragon chapter 25 . 8/14/2014
THIS NEEDS TO BE ANIMATED IN AN A/U (alternate universe) SPECIAL! I say alternate universe, because as well as this story goes along with the anime, it's still VERY different,but in a good way, a very, very, very good way! This story had drama,suspense, romance,a bit of stupidity (which is good, gives it comic relief) and epic plot twists! I am VERY impressed, and the ending was adorable, although there could of been more detail behind the kisses that were shared between Krillin and 18. Also another good twist would of been if the evil Vice President guy (sorry forgot the name) had woken up 18, down in his secret lab place, than tried to turn Krillin into an giant Robot arms spring from the walls pinning them both, than the evil Vice President guy,starts ranting off on how Krillin would make an excellent Android(which he would if you think about it...strongest human in the universe, with super speed and agility, along with the power to slice whatever he wants in half...honestly the guy's a force to be reckoned with.) And starts going at him with a scalpel, cutting into him fiercely while 18s helpless to do anything...seriously you should consider making a sequel out of this Vice President guy, breaks out of prison to seek his revenge against the Android, and what better way than by taking out the one person she truly loves...? But anyway, if you use this idea awesome, and I'm sure it would turn out as beautifully written as this one! Keep it up! XD
| ccranberry chapter 25 . 4/27/2014
Read this all in one sitting. LOVED it. Everything was kept so in canon, and your attention to detail was really fleshed out and made believable. I'm so glad you shared this story and I optimistically will keep my eyes open for more!
| Seshat's Blue Moon chapter 25 . 12/10/2013
I would tell you to forget GT. It doesn't make sense and the way in which they just murdered Seventeen bothers me a lot. It goes against the whole DBZ mantra of giving people a second chance. Seventeen was actually a good guy by the end of the Buu Saga. I remember he forced a couple of men to give their energy to Goku to kill kid Buu. But well, I'm rambling here. I really liked your story. There are very few good fics about Android 18. I'm glad I found this one. Hope you post Part II. I'd really love a canon story of Android 18 and Krillin.
| The Anon chapter 1 . 5/9/2013
Hello, and you did a great job with the chapter! The story was captivating, emotionally moving and completely understood through your expression. If I had anything remotely related to 'critiques', they would be encompassed in the the following:
1. Android 17 was the oldest of the siblings; this was implied by their numerical order ( #1 was created first, followed by #2, and etc), but also by the fact that he refers to his sister as "imouto", or "little sister" in the japanese version of the series. This point is uber-minor to me, because it can't discredit your story in any form.
2. When an individual is revived in the dragonball series, it's typically not in the place of their death, but the location of their body. The exceptions have always been either those who are training with one of the other-worldly masters, or those whose bodies have been completely destroyed. Again, this is less than minor to me, simply because 17 reviving underwater made your literature all the more interesting. ;)
So, what was the point of my post? Simply to compliment one of the best fan-fictions I've read and years. And chatting. Definitely chatting. _
| MitsukiAbarai chapter 25 . 1/2/2013
Thank you so much for writing such a great fanfiction. Krilin and Eighteen are definitely my favorite Dragon Ball's couple, and you did them justice in this masterpiece. This was probably the best fanfiction I have ever read about them, and I'm glad I found it. I also think Krilin is one of the most underrated characters in the DB's fandom, which is really sad to me, specially when he's, without a doubt, my favourite character. So when I read what Eighteen told him about what true strength was, I could do nothing but smile. Your fanfiction made me even shed tears, and I laughed a lot while reading it too. So this well-written work has given me more than a good time. I'll be waiting to read part 2, which I'm sure will be amazing, specially because it will focus on Krilin :)
| Alexandrosll chapter 25 . 12/3/2012
Take GT with a grain of salt definitely. I really dislike GT to be rather blunt. I mean I don't think Krillin even gets wished back? At least I don't believe he does in the show. If my memory is correct, am I not being lead to believe that Krillin dies at that point, and that's that. He doesn't get wished back, the end. It always just looked like a pretty lame way to treat Krillin. I'd rather you just stayed away from it and did what you wanted. I think you've proven yourself to be better than GT, and able to create something much more intriguing that deals with the characters we love better and in a more romantic view too.
As far as the story goes I would say it's pretty amazing! You've done a really great job. Its difficult to pull any fault from it. The climax of the story was fantastic. I can safely say I was thoroughly intrigued and engrossed in 18's back story. It was both plausible and a mystery that you wanted to keep reading to find out. The one thing I will say though was I think it lacked a bit of a 'romance'. The relationship between 18 and Krillin really developed and I loved that Krillin saw those picture of 18 being a machine thereby understanding her better than anyone could. It the needed development between 'Kami she's perfect!' to truly falling in love with 18, all parts of her. But I never felt like they were falling in love. Or that the story was about them falling for one another. Even when they got together it was more like a heart warming moment. Than as big of a deal as it should be. I guess it lacked that passion between them at times? 18 never really... Fell for Krillin I guess? And Krillin never really tried to get the girl. He just helped her. And because he helped her she grew to like him. He was simply there for her, and she developed feelings for him and the two kissed. Difficult to describe what I mean I guess? And the way they ended up dating was 'You can call me your girlfriend if you want.'? It just lacked that... 'Moment' in any romance.
But with that said you portrayed the characters very well, how they got together was heart warming and impossible to not like. Although I think it lacked a bit in the Romance side it was a great story from start to finish and one I could easily read again. Which is really the best compliment anyone could give really. Krillin and 18 is my favorite pairing in any franchise and my two favorite characters in any DB so I'm really happy to see an amazing story about them. Thanks a lot for all your hard work and for telling a thoroughly engrossing story!
Also I'm looking forward to seeing how you deal with the whole Krillin ages and dies leaving an immortal (I believe? Even Birch said it.) 18 alone for the rest of her days. I always had a romantic end for them that both tied Krillin's overall story in a neat knot and allowed them to live happily ever after. Although its probably a little naive. But I'm a hopeless romantic who likes happy endings! I'm definitely interested as to how you will deal with that. If that's the case.
| Sonson-Sensei chapter 25 . 10/25/2012
First off, I applaud this story. I started reading it a couple years back, and forgot about it once the updates stopped, so I was surprised to when I noticed not only had this story been updated, but it was finished as well.
I read the entire thing over in one sitting. It was freaking awesome, apart from the bullet thing, but I won't get into that. Anyway excellent work and I look forward to a part2.
As for GT, I'll be blunt. GT is absolute trash, that is full of contradictions, so don't worry about it. No one takes that crap seriously anyway.
| Deathra2 chapter 25 . 9/7/2012
Love this story. You really do this couple justice and I'm really looking forward to part two when you start posting. On the aspect of GT I don't consider it entirely canon because while dragon ball and dbz are based on the manga GT is stand alone and really nonsensical in places but that's just my two cents.
| Hallel chapter 1 . 8/30/2012
Really liked it. You write really well. Good plot, my only issue is that you killed it right when it was really warming up. I wouldn't mind seeing a little bit of their interactions with each other as they establish a relationship and how the rest of the characters respond to krillen and an aANnroid! Lol.
But really good, I really enjoyed it.
| ultimatedbzmaniac chapter 25 . 8/6/2012
That was a great story, I really like the way you ended it. I loved 18's past as well, it was quite interesting. But about GT, most people don't consider it Cannon, but I myself do believe it to be Cannon. But the thing about Gt is, that they made a few errors here and there. So while most of GT is Cannon, they created a few plot holes, that should never have been there.
But then again, same goes for Z, two or three plot holes popped up in Z as well. But I myself, and a few others just pass them off as stupidity from a character who said something to contradict another, such as Raditz saying that Planet Vegeta blew up three years before he came to earth. Which is not the case, of course. Or just some oversight, and we just ignore it.
So the best thing to do, would be to take the major events of GT as Cannon, but any plot holes created by dialogue, and such, should be ignored.
| lilDBZbuddy89 chapter 25 . 7/30/2012
Aww I love how part 1 ended! It seemed fitting in a way and it was nice to see Goku's family had come to terms with his death and seemed to be moving on from it. I loved Eighteen's conversation with Gohan too, it's not often we see any interaction between those two so it was a nice touch.
Can't wait to see what you have in store for us in part 2! I'll be sure to look out for it :D
In reference to your GT issue, I put that down to bad dubbing and getting confused with what actually happened :/ Go by what was said in DBZ not in GT is all I'd suggest, if that makes sense to what you're planning to do with Seventeen :p
Yay 100th reviewer! XD