Reviews for Twenty One
TheLegacyLives chapter 1 . 5/23/2010
wow.

This was very well written, I loved your realistic and careful description.

Ah, but just like the end of Death Note itself, it left me with a feeling of hopelessness and emptiness.

In the end, nobody won.

Near didn't really win, L Matt and Mello were killed, and Kira's kingdom was destroyed along with Light Yagami's life.

Very nice story
cLoud bLaze chapter 1 . 1/15/2010
Amazing detail, nailed the persoalities, perfect post oneshot fic.
DizzyIzzy-04 chapter 1 . 8/2/2009
Aw... This was really cute!
Bialy chapter 1 . 1/30/2009
So yeah, this was really quite exceptional.

Gevanni is a wonderful character and he's sorely under-represented in fanfiction. Especially when you consider, say, Matt, and how little he had to do with anything, and how he's just become one of the most prominent people in DN fanfiction. So first off, it's lovely to see someone pick up on one of my favourite, and rarely seen, characters.

The theme of loneliness (or rather, being alone - the idea that either of them is lonely is never explicitly stated but is, for me, clear in the underlying emotions) works really well here - starting off with Gevanni and winding down with Near. I also really love the way you've handled change and continuity - the toys, Near's shirt, the way he looks, the building: everything locks so neatly together to make it seem like because nothing has changed, everything has.

I like that this takes place after the oneshot, and handles what Gevanni would have done. His absence in that made me sad and wonder where he had gone, so it's wonderful to see him cropping up. It's believable too, because you've handled the characters so well. You have Near's personality down to a T, but what's better is that with a slight softening around the edges, you've made it clear that he and Gevanni have known each other for some time, that they have a 'history' of sorts...and that just brings a sense of reality to this fic like you wouldn't believe.

The idea is great. Setting such a covertly-emotional pice in L's old building is great: it's the contrast of pure business and duty versus the two characters who are, to all intents, simply catching up. Going out on the roof was a nice touch, too.

Overall, I really enjoyed this. It's beautiful, simplistic, endearing, and honest. Your style is beautiful, too - run-on sentences, detail, working Gevanni's thoughts into his action. The use of the present tense lends immediacy and heightens emotion and, well - it's spectacular. An instant favourite, thank you very much for writing this.
Carbucketty chapter 1 . 10/29/2008
Oh, you have indeed fulfilled your moral obligation! I loved it. You're characterization was wonderful. It seems almost effortless for you, especially Gevanni. But I do know how much you love him.

I'm really honored that this was written for ~me because I really loved it to bits and pieces.

I loved how teddy bears were mentioned, but not in the way I was almost expecting, since this whole Youth thing has been Brideshead Revisited inspired and all. It's nice to think that all children are the same, but it's not so. Sebastian and Near are both very childlike characters, yet they're so different, yet I still had a very Brideshead Revisited feeling throughout this whole thing.

Alas! I adore you and you're writing. This was spectacular. Fav'd.
keem chapter 1 . 10/29/2008
oh man, you write so *well*, and i'm honestly shocked that this hasn't gotten more reviews. seriously, you've got everything here pervert - the imagery is lovely, the characterization is down to a T, and the interaction between the two is engaging and captivating. my favorite part would have to be near the beginning, however, when Near and Gevanni discuss Near's dealings with the new, imposter Kira from the oneshot.

"I decided you knew how to handle it."

"And was your faith rewarded?"

"The killings have stopped."

"You didn't answer my question."

The scene change right there was pretty well executed; i got tinglies and *everything*. anwyay, i'm not much of a reviewer - my things just come out garbly and fangirly - but i really wanted to tell you how much i enjoyed this. excellent work!
WithABunny chapter 1 . 10/27/2008
You are undoubtedly one of my favorite authors. Reading anything you write is both worth my time and a great pleasure, and this is no exception.

Plenty of the minor characters in the series, and the fact that Gevanni is the main character here automatically pulls me in. What astounds me is that despite the fact that we barely see him in the series compared to the others, reading this fic gives me the same feeling that I get when watching and reading the canon.

In other words, you've characterized a character who was barely, if at all, characterized. Am I making sense here?

Not only is it Gevanni whom you have made believable, it's Near. The dialogue on both their parts is something I could imagine them saying, and knowing how hard those two are to write, I applaud you over cyberspace.

The way you've made your readers think by incorporating material from the series is great too. L did say that "Justice will, without fail, prevail", basically what was said in Near here. In the oneshot, it was clear to see that while Near was insightful, he had trouble trying to figure out the thoughts of his mentor. L's thoughts and Near's confusion are combined to make an excellent hypothetical question - if Kira had one, would he have been Justice? Considering that this series isn't real, the question disturbs me more than it should.

How did you do that?

"Can't see Near with anything that's not plastic or mechanical or completely artificial."

I agree with you. I don't know why, but I have never been able to see Near as a child playing with something cuddly, like a bear. It seems wrong, somehow...

And of course, I can't forget the actual interaction between Near and Gevanni. I was so caught up in everything else that I almost forgot to mention what I thought of this.

...Oh, that's right. In-character. Believable. Excellent. As for the ending, amusingly ironic (could it also be symbolic?).

I wish I could write like you.