|Reviews for Cards and Questions|
| BIGerontheInside chapter 15 . 2/6
Clearly I've stuck with the story some time to make it to chapter 19, so there are parts of it that I'm enjoying. Nevertheless, at multiple times throughout the story, I've fought the urge to express incredulity about some of the characters' behavior/language. It's confusing and difficult to ignore. So, my goal here is to give you some feedback about how some of aspects of this story might be interpreted by an unfamiliar reader (aka., it's my opinion, take once daily with a grain of salt). It's long because I think more specific feedback is more constructive.
Granted, I can only pretend to imagine the intended inflection of your dialogue, but I've been distracted by gratuitous use of the word "bitch" in your work (other stories as well). I honestly don't know what you're trying to convey when you use the term at this point. I don't doubt that Seifer would say it, but I don't think he'd say it to her left and right and I don't think she'd tolerate it, let alone use it in internal monologues. It's just...like I said, gratuitous. Don't get me wrong, in the right settings, I've got a mouth on me, so it's not as if I'm opposed to colorful language...
On a related note-why do all of the characters act so "trashy"? It seems wholly out of character. It's like every other scene they're screaming at one another and starting fights in seedy places, even though we're repeatedly reminded that the characters are supposed to out-class their surroundings.
Likewise the violence...some of it's pretty abusive. And in a way that goes beyond entertaining, like seifer throwing her into walls, bruising her arms, etc., it's a little past the line of rough sex, meanwhile she's smiling or whatever...I just don't buy it. Especially if she's a mercenary. Xu's character, for example, would have had her ass handed to her a long time ago and good riddance. I get it that Xu is intended to be l comic relief, but I found myself actually cringing through her scenes. Seriously, head wounds and orbital fractures are not things you can walk away from unless you playing the 'cure' card.
Your descriptions of seifer's physicality-which, let's be honest, is what has me reading fanficton-are enjoyable and lust-worthy. I'm kind of missing him with his giant silver phallic symbol...
Please excuse me for being frank, and understand that criticisms are meant constructively. I like most of the story, I think I would appreciate that even more if some of the other elements were...toned down?
| Jenmoon1 chapter 20 . 1/22/2015
sniff its sad what happens next
| Kim chapter 12 . 11/4/2013
Aww, I've been reading this story on and off for most of the day and this chapter ended with such a sweet moment. I also liked the flash backs that Seifer had while on the job. It was a great contrast, I think.
| Maims chapter 13 . 6/18/2012
I just noticed you had 199 reviews and I thought I'd make it a nice round number :D
I really liked this. It's... interesting. Are you planning on continuing it? Because I wanna read if you wanna write.
Actually (because I'm too lazy to do individual reviews) I really liked most of your stories. The second in the satellite trilogy was badly formatted, but Quistis's diary had me in stitches. Most people treat her like the Original Virgin. It was fun seeing her casual affairs, with Zone, Xu, Seifer, Xu and Seifer, and random assorted others if I'm reading it right.
And now I've written more about that story than this one. Sorry.
PS. More! I demand it!
| Maims chapter 20 . 6/14/2012
Oh Me Gawd, This is spectacular! One moment I'm crying and the next I'm laughing, and God this great.
| Quistis88 chapter 20 . 7/20/2011
I had a blast reading this, too. Great work. :)
| Quistis88 chapter 15 . 7/16/2011
This chapter was just plain awesome.
| Dream-Silver-Haze chapter 17 . 5/13/2010
I know that you seem to be worried about the plot lines but I kind of like it like this. I mean I will admit that Squall is a bit more of an asshole than I imagined and the reason for letting Quistis go is a little weak but besides that I like the openness of the plot. It makes the interactions seem more natural and more real. Real life sort of meanders especially when you are in a particularly rough patch. If you had wrote this with a specific plot idea in mind, it might not have captured the whole essence of living as exiles and the day to day of all of it.
| Dream-Silver-Haze chapter 6 . 5/3/2010
Best distraction ever!
| Freeverse chapter 11 . 2/16/2010
Squall is kind of a dick in this story, but I don't think it's entirely OOC. I mean, he did treat Quistis like shit during the game, so who's to say he wouldn't do the same after the game's events come to a conclusion?
Anyway, this is a lovely story. I love seeing Quistis and Seifer in that love-hate sort of relationship. No compromises for this couple. Just going for broke. They're not like Squall and Rinoa - all romantic and light. A Seiftis with mush just doesn't seem right.
| cerespallas chapter 20 . 12/8/2009
Aih, the end makes me sad and curious at the same time. It's so open-ended! Quistis and Xu traveling around the world (or just heading straight to Centra) to find Seifer is too good to be ignored.
Have you write the sequel? If you have, I should read it right away, before my workpile is getting too much and I can't read again.
If you leave Quistis and Seifer in Dollet, they'll just be another couple once the novelty wears off. This way, the story continues and my hope grows bigger. I sure hope each or one of them get something they really want aside from each other. They were really unhappy with the way things worked out now.
| cerespallas chapter 19 . 12/8/2009
I finally read this again after... a few months? This chapter actually has a lot of promise, especially about Ami and the boy who liked to tease her, and about Quistis keeping Seifer's old exam papers. The answers in those papers really showed how much he cared for her. It's too bad she realized it too late.
Squall is always a bastard, so I think you portrayed him well already. He's not a kind-hearted person, even in game he may give in to some things just because he found it a hassle to act otherwise. A nice and talkative Squall wouldn't be Squall anymore.
| Useless-Materia chapter 20 . 11/29/2009
I suppose I don't care for the ending of this so much, but I reiterate that I do like your Squall. Well, not really, but you know. I think you got him right. Maybe a little more reason to fire her from the getgo, but I agree with his bitchiness and super overprotective nature towards Rinoa. Put the story on my alert list because I'd love to reread it if you do decide to alter it in any fashion.
| Useless-Materia chapter 19 . 11/29/2009
You know, FF8 was my favorite of all the Final Fantasies - still is. I've spent more hours playing that game than I've spent doing anything else. And when I read and reread enough Seiftis fanfiction, it makes me want to go back and play it all over again. But then I remember that I'll have to sit through Squall's bullshit - that he never seems to fucking leave. And then I think "Oh, well maybe I won't play it today..."
Anyway, I didn't know if I liked this story as it started out, but I love it now. I love the direction it's taking, as I love romantic Seifer and Quistis, even in their own little fucked up way.
I used to hate Rinoa, and parts of me still do, but I pity her too. She really is a nice person, albeit boring as a character. She's stupid, but she's sweet. And after all, she is the one stuck with Squall's emo bitchiness.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, I love the way you write Squall - exactly the bitch that he is and hardly leadership material. And I also like how you right Rinoa - horribly girly, but thoughtful and sweet.
| Clement Rage chapter 1 . 11/9/2009
When I read the summary of this story, I thought it was going to be, y'know, the generic in Balamb Garden fic where Seifer is miraculously not only not hung, but completely forgiven, and they hate each other initially, but...well. So you can imagine how pleased I was to discover a gritty, realistic dialogue with (mostly)perfect characterisations, although I do think you weren't quite fair to Squall, speaking as a hypocrite who wrote an incredibly derisive anti-Rinoa fic a few years back.
One other thing, a minor detail, but it's a pet hate of mine...how did Seifer learn how to do plumbing? That's something that always annoys me, when asoldier or a lawyer abandons their previous job to become a carpenter or a bricklayer. You might get away with being a labourer, but a trade, like tiling, plastering, or wiring a building is a three year apprenticeship! You couldn't just pick it up, not if you wanted to keep a job for any length of time.
Sorry. That in no way detracts from the overall story, by the way, It's still one of the best I've seen on the site