|Reviews for The Agency|
| AJeff chapter 2 . 11/30/2008
I don't know how I missed your update. I'm sorry. Great chapter, I love the Petrelli Brothers' dialog. I'll be waiting for more.
| GreenLeoFiend chapter 2 . 11/21/2008
I am pretty sick of these almost deaths too. And no the solution is not killing them either. I love good melodramatic but it can be done differently. Mohinder acting normal would be a great asset. Good chapter. Loved the Petrelli chat.
| a happy bibliophile chapter 2 . 11/21/2008
Well, it's still in its beginnings. Your writing could be better. There's a few grammatical errors sprinkled about.
The only problem I have with it is that it's very dialog heavy - more suited to radio drama (hey, that's an idea!), though it's understandable from my point of view.
Getting the agency started seemed a bit forced with Peter pestering Nathan about it.
Also, not a really big deal, but where exactly are they? I'm assuming they're at either Peter's apartment, Nathan's apartment in D.C., or at the Petrelli Mansion in Hyde Park, as Nathan would definitely not want people to overhear him talking about humans with extraordinary abilities.
There's also no need to put in the fact that Sylar's a Petrelli, unless you're going to bring that up again in future chapters.
With a bit of work (and a beta) this could be really good. It's got potential. :) Mind you, I'm looking at this from a reader's point of view. I'm not much in the way of writing.
Keep it up. I'll be waiting for Chapter 3.
| GreenLeoFiend chapter 1 . 11/20/2008
Interesting start. Looking forward to more. Ooh! Two Nathans, which Nathan is which? Or are they neither?
| AJeff chapter 1 . 11/14/2008
Hey! I like this. Hope you'll continue. Want to know what happens next.
| a happy bibliophile chapter 1 . 11/14/2008
It's rather short to be judged fairly at the moment, but I like the idea. Ever since Matt and Nathan partnered up in Season 2, I thought they'd make a pretty good team.
I'm interested in how this turns out.