|Reviews for Human Anatomy|
| Elisasbrooklyn chapter 2 . 8/6/2017
I don't get the skin one? I like the idea of these though. They're cute.
| Broadway Evanescence chapter 3 . 12/1/2013
What Erik said at the end was really deep lol
| Broadway Evanescence chapter 1 . 12/1/2013
I'm laughing really hard right now! I honestly had no idea what they were doing and that just made my day! Hilarious!
| Southern Facade chapter 14 . 12/29/2011
Le gasp...! There's no more? D: Why isn't there more...? *whines* I refused to go to bed with my boyfriend; because I wanted to read this SO BADLY, and now, since I've reached the last chapter- I can only cry in dispair! Stalking you now seems to be my only option, if I want to be entertained.
| Dysthymic Panda chapter 14 . 10/22/2011
Brain - Squee, this one is so cute o Besides the fact that they got to kiss at the end (awkward as it was, but it should be awkward, ne?), I really love how Erik keeps picking on Raoul and subtly encouraging him to do something about his feelings. The sarcasm in his lines is wonderfully amusing. Oh, but my absolute favorite thing about this ficlet is the movement that goes along with the dialogue. Neither of them stay still while they're talking; instead, they fidget and make gestures to accompany their words. I dunno, it's what people do in real life, so it always makes me happy when writers pay attention to it :3 So thank you very much for writing this _ It's so cute, I can't stop smiling.
"He shouted, angry at himself..." The 'he' should be lowercase. You know better than that, ne?
"Annunciating each word..." 'To annunciate' means 'to announce', which could work, but I think you meant 'enunciating'?
""So," Raoul stared..." If the verb following a line of dialogue does not indicates speech, then the punctuation before the closing quotation mark should be one that ends a sentence. Commas do not (I recommend an ellipsis).
Temple - Awww, this one is so sweet. Raoul's so doting and attentive, and I like how single-mindedly focused he is on making Erik feel better. The considerate and gentle way he takes care of him (immediately closing all of the curtains, letting him lay in his lap, petting him) is unexpectedly intimate, and it's nice to think that Erik trusts him enough to touch him like that. I like the attention to how much pain Erik's headache is causing him and how he starts sulking when Raoul leaves the room. That's so petty, but it does well to emphasize how miserable he's feeling. Thank you very much for writing this snippet. It's wonderful to see them so affectionate towards each other even when they're not really doing anything.
"...the pain had plateaud..." '-ed' makes regular verbs past tense. In other words, this is misspelled: 'plateaued'.
"...how excited and pleased had Raoul looked." Maybe switch 'had' and 'Raoul' in this sentence? At least for the sake of parallel structure.
(Sorry about your sun migraines :( That must be hard to deal with.)
| Emilx311 chapter 14 . 10/22/2011
Loved them both so much! I was giggling all the way through brain, it was hilarious! And honestly at start on temple I thought for a couple seconds that Erik had a hangover :P But his thoughts about Raoul were so cute there...awesome work as always.
| Eminnis chapter 14 . 10/22/2011
Awww...I liked the second one. Good job and update soon!
| Dysthymic Panda chapter 13 . 10/12/2011
(I'm so, so, so sorry that this review is late D: It was unfair of me to make you wait three months when it only took me a little over an hour to read and review. Gomen nasai; I'll try hard to make sure that doesn't happen again.)
Feet - Aw, this one is so cute; I love fics/drabbles where they're just hanging out. There's no dramatic pressure urging them to do something significant, and every little action and word doesn't necessarily have to mean something. Even when they're snipping at each other, it's relatively good-natured instead of intending to hurt, and I like that kind of relaxed atmosphere. This little snippet is lighthearted and sweet, and it's a nice break from all of the more serious stuff. (And I like that Raoul flat out refuses to let Erik lead at the end. Yay for him.) Thank you very much for writing it. It made me smile _
(Btw, I'm proud to say that I caught onto what they were actually doing rather quickly, although I commend you on your efforts to make it sound as dirty as possible. I don't think it's choppy, though; writing scenes that are intended to be misconstrued usually don't come out very fluent in general, and this made sense in and out of context. What more can you do, ne? Please have a little more confidence, ne?)
"...if it meant that he Raoul..." Typo?
Shin - Awright, this one is pretty damn cute, too o failInRelationships!Erik is quirkily endearing, but stubborn!Erik is even better (as long as it's not angst-inducing stubbornness). And I like how Raoul's obviously concerned, but still... I believe the phrase is 'sticking to his guns'? "As much as he felt badly, he really wanted to gloat." That line's my favorite :D Given the situation, it should be a mildly inappropriate desire, but I suppose that's what makes the entire situation so entertaining. Anyway, thank you very much for writing this drabble (even though you don't like it much). I like it, and it made me laugh, and therefore, it's good _
As for the choppiness, I think it's choppy because the background situation between Erik and Raoul isn't very clear through most of it. You've used this writing technique before, but I think because this segment was meant to be short and quick, you didn't have the time you normally spend dropping hints and building up to the revelation. (But eh, wth do I know, anyway?) Also, with the line "Erik noted that to himself silently." at the end, you suddenly and unnecessarily shifted POVs.
(I feel like I should be offended that dependence in a relationship is inferred to be a feminine trait, but, mostly, I'm just inappropriately amused X3 Also, where did Christine go?)
| minlin chapter 11 . 10/11/2011
You're right the second part was sad, heartbreaking even. Poor Erik.
The first part though? I can just picture Raoul's expression when Erik told him he'd already spoken to Phillipe! Too funny!
| Emilx311 chapter 13 . 8/22/2011
Wow loved it although I was quite (pleasantly) surprised to see this updated :)
| whatevergirl chapter 13 . 8/17/2011
Wow... Hero!Raoul. I like it. Haha, poor Raoul in teaching Erik to dance though. It seems like there is quite a task there! :)
| The Crazed Artist chapter 13 . 8/16/2011
Oh man you had me going there. I knew it was a euphemism but I could not quite pin it especially with the "knee locking" I sat there going: "...Wait...What?"
I was giggling at the image of Erik dancing with the mannequin too, or lord that would be hilarious.
I can imagine Erik being the kind of person who is clingy and demanding when it is convenient for him, but as soon as Raoul gets needy and wants some attention Erik is " " and pushes him away.
Silly crazy moody phantom man.
Anyways, hilarious and sweet work! Keep it up! :D
-The Crazed Artist
| Eminnis chapter 13 . 8/16/2011
Good chapters! Liked the contrast between feet and shin. Keep up the good work!
| kakdan chapter 1 . 6/9/2011
I love this so much though I don't understand the whole words meaning exactly what-I'm not English speaker-but surely these lovely piece works suit for my taste! The "back", it was very awesome, especially the line-"You can turn your back on me. Just never leave me."-was to be very plane(in fact), but it turns out to be kinda surprise attack! The most direct one that could be accepted without any repulsion, Phew!
| ninofkonoha chapter 1 . 3/30/2011
haha my mind totally went south...god im horrible