Reviews for Oh, Freddy
the-hippie-whittlers chapter 1 . 10/24/2009
you claim my spongecock story sucks? You just wrote about how Mary Sue does it with a seriel killer! I am disapoint. :c

Even this makes more sense: /watch?vMIgbkf6Dlm4

Though I must say, I do love ur story about Mj and Arthur.

And one more thing, wouldn't she be more then a little pissed that her only friend got ripped to pieces by a burned fuck?

Love,

Vanessa
LoverOfArchangels chapter 1 . 9/22/2009
plz plz continue this i luv freddy and i luv ur stories
WolfxAngel chapter 1 . 1/31/2009
Lmao...Please, update soon!
EmoCrystal chapter 1 . 12/29/2008
omg dude ur story kicks some MAJOR ass. keep writing/
Mike9305 chapter 1 . 11/29/2008
lmao at the ending scene...

But I think you should change the story's rating to M. But I liked the story overall. I felt bad fot Helaina at the beginning and when she lost Julianna until she started bringing him sacrifices. Also, you should start a new paragraph when somebody new is speaking.

Example

“Ms. Manson, I’m afraid I’m going to have to call your parents.” Helaina’s eyes widened. “No!” She panicked, “ANYTHING but that!” “I have no choice, Helaina.” Mr. Jackson said, and picked up the phone.

should be

“Ms. Manson, I’m afraid I’m going to have to call your parents.” Helaina’s eyes widened.

“No!” She panicked, “ANYTHING but that!”

“I have no choice, Helaina.” Mr. Jackson said, and picked up the phone.

Also, this is like a pet peeve of my haha but this:

“I have no choice, Helaina.” Mr. Jackson said, and picked up the phone.

Should be

“I have no choice, Helaina,” Mr. Jackson said, and picked up the phone.

There's a comma after Helaina. You seem to have used this rule correctly a few times, but often just put a period. Try to watch out for that!

I liked your writing overall, but the chapters seemed a little too short, and the story seemed rushed in some places. Good story!