|Reviews for For Good I: Breakaway|
| EchidnaPower chapter 14 . 7/12/2015
I cannot even begin to describe how thoroughly impressed I am with this story, and how much I wish you would return to it even after over 3 years. I understand your desire for reviews as I constantly wish to get some of my own for any stories I write, and the feeling you get when you don't get any is terrible. And unfortunately, for fandoms such as this, that feeling comes along all too often.
So despite how long it's likely been since you received a review for this story, allow me to say before anything else regarding the story itself. God Bless you. I was not at all expecting what I found myself getting into, but the joy I had when I found out that you - like me - took it upon yourself to create a world where Jesus Christ existed and is real despite the fictional reality, was indescribable.
I normally despise having my emotions played with, but for Chapter 4 I was weeping, you masterfully conveyed emotions and feelings into Erin's story, and her interactions with Jesus made me smile and cry all at the same time. How often do we as Christians find ourselves in situations where we are forced to go by faith alone and trust that His plan is greater than anything we could ever come up with? I wish that I could have a similar meeting with Jesus the way you wrote with Erin.
Even as a guy, I'm not afraid to admit you had me hooked right then and there, my heart had been reeled in and I couldn't stop reading from that point forward. I read Erin's journey, her development as a person, found myself wanting to know more about her...and her relationship with Jesus.
The interactions between her and the main characters are brilliant, she's written so well that I can easily picture her and see her as an actual person. There's nothing fake about her personality and nothing seems forced, even her apparent sudden fascination with Sherlock Holmes. Even as abrupt as it is, it doesn't bother me, it's just another aspect about who Erin is that I've gotten to learn.
Obviously the way you write the main characters is excellent as well. XR is his usual snarky self and Booster is the loveable naive farm boy we all love. Buzz and Mira, a pairing that doesn't get nearly the amount of love that it should, you're handling it rather well in my opinion. Despite throwing Romac into the equation, the whole series had the subtle suggestion that there might have been something more between Buzz and Mira, despite the age difference.
And as far as I'm concerned, it isn't even a big deal. If Good ol' Buzz can live to be 150 years old with his life being pretty much dedicated to feverishly building his time watch to save Mira (if that isn't proof of love I don't know what is), he'd probably live much longer and healthier with Mira by his side. I'm reminded of a Justice League Unlimited episode with Static Shock making an appearance as an old man. "The wonders of modern medicine, 65 is the new 30." By that thinking, Buzz is still in his prime, and age difference means almost nothing.
Warp is amazing. You take his character and effectively deepen the essence of who he is, what he does and why he does it. And once again we're taken back to Erin, as her influence on him, despite lightyears of distance apart, is slowly appearing to turn him back towards the road to redemption.
It's amazing to me. So many people in so many fandoms love to throw in their own made up characters and make them the star with the main characters just as people who interact with them, but I have never been so fascinated by a character until I met your Erin. I want to know more about her, I want to read more of her adventures, I want to see her relationships with her friends, enemies, and Jesus continue to grow and develop as she herself does. It's been 3 years since you last updated this, and I don't care in the slightest. I am going to follow this story, favorite it, and then do the same to you as an author.
Even if you don't come back to this fic, I hope you'll read this review and smile knowing that there are people out there who not only share your love for a series that was always blithely dismissed as nothing due to the extra added cleverness by Mark McCorkle and Bob Schooley, but that there are people out there who share your obvious affection and dedication to God and Jesus. It's people like you who give me hope that the world has not completely fallen into darkness, and if there were more individuals like you, I have no doubt that the world would be a much happier place.
Thank you so much for writing this, and from the bottom of my heart, from one believer to another, God Bless you.
| Guest chapter 11 . 8/23/2012
The writing is good here. I like the speech Buzz gives to the young cadets the most; it seems IC. However...there's one thing I am not sure I quite understand. Before this chapter, there was no mention of Sherlock Holmes beforehand. And now all of a sudden, Erin is a Sherlockian and meets another fan...it seems too abrupt and random. I understand that we see Erin's email address in the last chapter as a semi-subtle way to introduce the fact she's a Sherlockian, but here...it just seems too sudden. Other than that, well done, though!
| Aaron chapter 14 . 8/5/2012
Love this story Aleine. Just found about it two nights ago. I sincerely hope that you intend to finish it!
Aaron from AUS
| Aaron chapter 13 . 8/4/2012
Hey the fan from AUS is here again.
Really liked this chapter! Kudos for not taking the cheap way out with buzz and mira, making their rimance overnight.(i personally think its because, if an when it happens, your story and the BLoSC saga inits entirety will be completed- no more sequels). May your (and our) patience be rewarded!
P.S. pretty sure i saw a salute to frodo and galadriel from the scene on cirith ungol in return of the king, when frodo finally collapsed from lack of will. Am i wrong?
| Aaron abboud chapter 6 . 8/4/2012
Hey, a new fan from AUS.
You dont know how much it means to me to find someone who is a) in love with the show b) cant understand why it wasnt finished c)actively willing to dismemeber those under-proveleged ninnies who cancelled the show d) wants the show to make a comeback! And e) who is a christian that i am assuming was home-schooled.
If all of the above are true we have very much in common. Even the things which you enjoy in cinema and literature!
You have made my childhood that much more complete.
P. S. characterizations are great. The sixth thing we have in common is that we agree that buzz mira and warp steal this show. Booster is an especially hard character to dig deep with.
| Kat Eclipse chapter 14 . 4/2/2012
*crys* oh dear me, *gets self under control* teribly sorry, I am in SUCH a sappy mood! everything mildly romantic is making me cry today! Anyway... :))
I really like the way you write Warp, you stay true to his character but draw out his emotions! and that's REALLY HARD to do for the characters that fall into the 'tough guy' column! *gives you standing ovation* :D Speaking of Warp...I want to hug Erin and Warp! the poor things!
I loved Mira and Eirn's scene, and Erin, Riki, and Windy's for that matter, heart-to-heart girl talk is always good! And so is fangirlism! XDDD hehe 95's reaction was great! (loved the TT crater thing ;) and of course THE BEER! not that I'm obsessed or anything ;)
Emotional upheavals? aw, *hugs* that's about as fun as sticking your finger in a light socket! -.- I hope it gets better soon! :)
| Kat Eclipse chapter 13 . 4/2/2012
Deviantart account! awsomesause! XD I would go on it right now but my firewall is giving me fits *grrrr* I shall have to figure to what its problem is *picks up hammer* :)) Time jumps? *cue the LGM's* oooo the plot thickens!
I like the tidbit of consoling with Nebula and Buzz (methinks your headed toward what we talked about on the BLoSC board... ;)
haha, RP's in the Academy! I like it! ooo, Beer me likey! *claps* ;) And I LOVE the Warp and Zomega flashback! He does have a little bit of family after all! XDDDDD
And of course the Sherlock Holmes marathon is priceless! (I will admitt acting like that in the name of a fandom tis quite fun sometimes!) It made me wanna watch a Sherlock movie! Which I just might do sometime soon... :)))
Over all awsome chapter!
| Kat Eclipse chapter 12 . 4/2/2012
ok HOW DID I MISS THREE CHAPTERS GOING UP! wait a sec, *looks at email client* ARG! too many emails, everything is buried! *huff* ok rant over , I shall watch ze email more carefully now. :D
haha that was great! the begining reminded me of me and my friends when we get into a 'imitate fictional characters' mood ;))) and the rest, four words... Edge. Of. My. Seat. XD And I love the ending, I'm far from being a Trekkie (yet *underlines yet*, I'm currently watching the movies for the first time :) but that last bit made me laugh! Nice touch ;)
I think you did awsome with this, my mental camera could see it all quite clearly!
| Ranger-Nova chapter 14 . 3/30/2012
Another chapter! Awesome!
*victorious laugh* I've seen SG-1, Atlantis, B5, TOS, TNG, DS9, and Voyager all the way through. It took awhile, but I did it.
Libraries are an option when it comes to finding DVDs, but I'm not sure if any of them have Sherlock Holmes. Yard sales aren't really, 'cause not many people hold them here (I live in South Africa, where crime is pretty rampant, so everyone has walls around their houses which makes it a bit difficult to hold sales).
I'm glad there's going to more to the story - I look forward to it!
Okay, moving on to the review:
It was nice to just spend some time watching the characters develop, and I loved seeing Team Lightyear.
Things are getting nice and Beery between Buzz and Mira - I can't wait for them to actually become a couple. They're so cute together. As I told you on the forum, I'm reading 100D right now so I'm in a Buzz/Mira mood.
Having never seen ANY Sherlock Holmes TV series or movies (except for The Hound of the Baskervilles - that was my first contact with SH), I can't really comment on who the best Holmes is, but I assume RDJ must be pretty awful for Ricki to get mad.
Anyway, gotta run.
| Ranger-Nova chapter 13 . 3/10/2012
Another chapter! I guess my instincts aren't as good as I thought, 'cause I wasn't expecting this!
First of all, no worries about Teal'c's name - I mean, when you think about it, it doesn't even make sense that he has an apostrophe in it. I'm glad you like Stargate - it's a fun show, and you should really check out Stargate Atlantis as well (the other spin-off, Universe, you might be better off ignoring - there's a reason it only lasted two seasons). And I love Teal'c too - he's awesome!
I've reviewed one of your SH stories, and I've read quite a few. Expect to see more reviews soon! I'd really love to see the Granada series, but I have very limited bandwidth, so I can't watch YouTube videos (though the series may be available for renting somewhere - I'd have to look around). Another series I'd love to see one day is Sherlock - mostly because of Benedict Cumberbatch (he's going to be in the next Star Trek movie!). It was nice to see you'd mentioned him.
Okay, moving on to the actual story itself, I really loved this chapter. The scene with Mira and Buzz was nice - I like how you're taking it slow with them, because one of the major problems with a lot of Beer fics is that it just happens too fast - they suddenly fall in love and live happily ever after. The way you're doing it seems much more realistic.
My favourite parts of the chapter were probably those with Warp - particularly this bit: "I can handle it," he murmured back, twisting around to return the hug. "I'm just tired, is all." Twenty years later, he was still tired.
And I'm really starting to like Zomega for some reason. She seems very interesting.
I look forward to the next chapter - though it'll be sad when the story comes to the end. Will it be continued in another long fic, besides all the little fillers?
P.S. I checked out your deviantART page and I love the SH pics. I can't wait to see some BLoSC ones.
| Historian1912 chapter 13 . 3/8/2012
I liked the content of this chapter, but it felt like it wandered around too much. It took me a minute to get my bearings with all the flashback scenes. Glad to see that Erin is doing well, as is the rest of the team. Funny, I just now realized how many original characters you have in this thing: about half the cast. Which is awesome. I only just now thought about that since most of the characters act as part of a group rather than individually, such as Erin herself. I can't wait for the next chapter, though.
Sorry I told you things you already know, but I've learned to never assume someone knows something, even if it is somewhat obvious. My best friend and I stll repeat stuff to each other that we technically should already know just to be on the safe side, usually school stuff, so I keep forgetting not to do that with everyone. Again, sorry.
Glad to see you at least read my stuff. Please don't ever mention my first draft to anyone, not even your family. They might think it was some kind of mental assault on you or something and try to get me arrested. Not sure whether to take "the constructive crit while take awhile to give" as a good thing. The last time you sent me one of those I stopped trying to write for three months then deleted what I had written and started over. I'm currently working on another 'scene' to add to my oneshot collection, but I want to see if I need to fix what is already there first. Maybe I'll start on my BLOSC idea in the meantime. It might go up to M rating, though. Some of my ideas were pretty dark. Depends on how much I show rather than tell.
| Kgirl chapter 13 . 3/8/2012
Love the family dynamic! (And Beer. always. XD)
| Ranger-Nova chapter 12 . 3/8/2012
Somehow, I just had a feeling there was going to be another chapter this week. I was right!
Once again, I'd like to say how glad I am you're continuing this story! I'm really enjoying it. I reread the whole thing awhile back, and it put me in the mood for more.
I love all the Star Trek references (funny, Erin as Kirk never would have occurred to me, but it fits) and I was thrilled by the Stargate mention (it's another of my favourite shows). Just one minor thing: Teal'c was spelt wrong - you put the apostrophe after the T. Nonetheless, I loved that you mentioned him.
All through the test, I was thinking "Kobayashi Maru", but I like how they all managed to get away safely (without even having to reprogram the test! *wink*).
All in all, great chapter and I'm really liking the chemistry between Erin and Ricki. I can't wait for the next one (it'll be great to see Buzz and Mira - I hope there'll be some Beer!).
P.S. I've just finished reading all the Sherlock Holmes books, so expect to see some reviews on you SH fanfics soon!
| Historian1912 chapter 12 . 3/8/2012
I was rereading the story, including the reviewer responses, and I noticed on the last chapter that you said you were having trouble finding Star Trek episodes. If you have Netflix, particularly the streaming version, you'll be able to access every single Star Trek series (TOS, TNG, DS9, VOY, and ENT). Hope this helps.
| Queen S of Randomness 016 chapter 12 . 3/4/2012
awesome story so far! i hope you update soon! - :)