|Reviews for Every Desperate Retreat|
| InkWeaverabc chapter 1 . 11/25/2015
This was great - you interpretation of Peter and his struggles is amazing - I felt the other-world-ness so strongly and his age in youth and so unsure what to do. I feel for Melanie so much, but I also felt so happy that I knew Peter was going home - I hope Melanie is happy, but I hope she comes home as well in the end :)
| Starbrow chapter 1 . 12/21/2011
Another excellent offering; this was splendid! Some random things I liked: "He wonders if she knows that there comes a time when you get old enough to love fairy tales again", the way Peter wants to go and fix everything in Narnia himself instead of letting the "unprepared" youngsters do it, the sword scene where everybody notices how good Peter is, and RHINDON! Very nice explanation of why Susan wants to forget Narnia too - it's creative and realistic and non-judgmental.
The only part I didn't like: "Edmund and Lucy shoot him identical looks of disappointment." This reads more Edmund, but Lucy has a little more empathy (even if she too can be shallow) - think how she says "poor girl" when Caspian describes the squinty freckled Duke's daughter. So I think she would try to conceal her disappointment for Peter's sake. But that's just my take.
Now I'm off to read the last installment! WELL done!
| MithLuin chapter 1 . 1/9/2011
This is amazing! I love the idea of Peter, with his very Narnian thoughts, trying to court a high queen in England in such a normal, mundane way. And his resolve to make her a Friend of Narnia *just* missing the mark - very poignant. I know his obedience is canon, but you make his resistance to letting Eustace and Jill take up his mantle believable.
| QueenoftheSlayers chapter 1 . 9/3/2010
That train line made me laugh... and then sad at the last one...
Oh, I have to finish the Last Battle...
| JilltheKingess chapter 1 . 8/24/2010
I cannot tell you to the magnitude that this deserves that this is an incredible fanfic. I have read plenty of fanfics about what it was like for the Pevensies to return to England. They fall in love and are comforted by their significant other, blah, blah, blah. Always soppy and happy fluffy bunnies at the end. Everythings perfect, they are perfectly fine with letting go of the country they ruled for 15 years! Etc., etc., and so forth.
This was different. Peter deperatly wants to be a king again, he wants to rule. Melanie is not the perfect girl thats practically from Narnia and is blond and blue-eyed. She's a normal Brit. You make it feel real when Peter doesn't want to send Jill and Eustace. From other's point of view, Jill and Eustace are perfectly capable, and prove that in the Last Battle. But the high king feels diffrently. He wants to go back and defend Narnia. To save Narnia.
You are a very talented author. Never stop writing, even when all your writing is refused or criticized. Keep trying, and you will create another masterpiece. I haven't read your other works, but as soon as I'm done writing this I'm going to find them and read.
For Aslan and for Narnia!
| sonsofdurin chapter 1 . 4/30/2010
Wow! This was beautiful. I cried at the end. I always cry at the end of Last Battle too.
| lunawannabe chapter 1 . 4/23/2010
I love your style of small little scenes thet still manage to flow together and tell a story. I loved how Susan told her boyfriend about Narnia, it was probobly my favorite part, and how Peter is still putting Narnia above everything else. You made an awesome blend of still being Narnian, yet living in England. Your descrpition of Peter wanting to go to Narnia himself captured his character so well, and was so very High Kingly. Wonderful job!
| Rowena Stark chapter 1 . 1/11/2010
Wow! That was such an awesome one-shot! It flowed wonderfully, and you really had Peter perfectly in-character throughout it I think! Great job! )
| mokatster chapter 1 . 1/8/2010
This is such a great follow-up to "More Dimly in Hell." I think you've captured Peter quite well here, and I can sense his authority and strength even though being away from Narnia has unbalanced him.
There were so many lines in this that I liked, but one in particular struck me: "...Peter has the distinct feeling he has outlived himself."
This was fantastic. Thank you!
| Violet Fire Krazed chapter 1 . 1/7/2010
| Love and Rock Music chapter 1 . 8/25/2009
Exquisite. I adore this story, and I'm appalled that it's only got two measly little reviews? Ridiculous. This is one of the best stories on the whole site!
Everything about this piece hits the mark and exceeds it. It is a perfect blend of romance and Peter's reaction to England, and I think it fitting that the former would soothe the latter. I like Melanie very much. It's so like Peter to fall for a girl who has barely anyone - of course he'd want to take care of her, protect her, marry her. Peter needing the Friends' approval more than his parents' was spot-on, and so was leaving Edmund to explain it. Having Polly give him Helen's ring was wonderful. I especially loved the line, "he wonders what his advisers would think of Melanie, who is the world to Peter but who could never be a queen".
Your writing style is amazing; this is true word-weaving, the kind that draws the reader in and creates true depth from the characters. There is something so emotionally grabbing about this piece. I feel like the whole thing is simmering with an anger that Peter won't allow himself to feel - it becomes a sadness and a sense of loss instead, the pain of which is tempered by Melanie.
Best of all, I love that Peter puts Narnia before her - that once the Professor mentions his feeling, there is no longer an option to refuse. I love that resentment and clenching of fists when he struggles to accept that they must all rely on Jill and Eustace, "a boy who can barely use a sword". And the foreboding when Peter crumples the telegram - fabulous! And so heart-wrenching. The ending was incredible - no other words.
All-time fave line: "And he thinks to himself that he is neither fish nor fowl, because he is no longer Narnian and yet he isn’t British either; his priorities are still Narnian and his thoughts are still Narnian and his family is still Narnian." -Seriously, one of the best in all of fandom. Amazing.
| sleepy southpaw chapter 1 . 3/30/2009
You nailed Peter's sadness so well. You know, you say you don't inner contemplating and thoughts and whatnot - but really, this was perfect. Although, I'm pretty partial to angst. I adored this. Great job, Em.
| fledge chapter 1 . 12/21/2008
Another beautiful pre-LB story. Very convincing image of Peter and his way of coping with everything. Will he meet Melanie again in the Real Narnia?
You still have to do Edmunds pov, you know that, don't you?