|Reviews for My Sister Rosalie, Book I: Captor|
| Condor green chapter 54 . 7/17/2010
You know, after reading this through for a second time, I noticed that the Bella in this story appears to suffer from really intense case of Stockholm
Syndrome. Was this on purpose?
I hope to see this continued at some point in the future(can't really tell from you profile if this is being continued).
| Avarenda chapter 5 . 7/2/2010
I enjoyed how Bella described Rosalie in this chapter. Whats ironic, is the very way in which she seemed to describe Rose, spoke a little of the attraction she may have felt for her. Although, when you have someone as beautiful as Rose simply EXISTING; It would probably be impossible for any gender not to feel at least a slight attraction.
You wax so poetically about Rosalie, especially her eyes, which we all know is supposed to be the window to the soul.
Of course, we all know what Rose is thinking when she first see's Bella. Even if RLT didn't exist, it seems fairly obvious.
'This is the girl i was rejected for? This plain little thing? She's obviously not very eloquent is she?' Yet. Yet, she does seem to appreciate the effort on Bella's half to offer assistance, even if the offer only brings her sorrow for her lost humanity.
In truth, Bella had every reason to feel overwhelmed. It's not every day you meet the most beautiful woman in the world. Who seems to hate you.
Ironically, Bella is even more tongue tied around Rose than she is Edward. Bella will definitly think twice before facing 'Lillian Hale' again.
Although, really. What was Carlisle thinking, taking Rose's last name? Could that be any more suspicious? Although, knowing Rose, and her pride in her heritage, she probably absolutely refused to change her last name. So the Cullen's were forced to play along.
Hmm, now i wonder, in canon, if Rose has ever had a last name other than Hale. Since she refuses to take the Cullen name. Was Rose ever a Rosalie Witlock, when she pretended Jazz was her twin? Somehow i doubt she was ever a 'Rosalie Masen'. In fact, I'd bet she'd pitch a fit if it was even insinuated.
At any rate, good chapter.
| Avarenda chapter 4 . 7/2/2010
I liked how the horses could smell the Cullens and instinctively got nervous. I think a lot of people overlook how animals would naturally react to vampires who would drain them dry.
Bella's reaction to the interior of the house was amusing, because she feels so amazed. Again, she notices the little things about the Cullens though. like how they accept the food, but don't serve it, how Carlisle seems nervous they're here.
As well he should be, with a newborn Rose in the house. Still, i couldn't help but shake my head and laugh at how Bella basically bullied Carlisle and Esme into letting her visit Rose. She just wouldn't take no for an answer.
Then leaving Charlie with Esme and Carlisle. I feel bad for the old guy, he's completely socially awkward.
Then eddy showing up out of nowhere and 'walking' Bella to Rose's room. Probably to try and keep Rose from eating her on accident (or maybe, sorta, on purpose)
I loved the line you used to end the chapter though. It makes the thing seem so dramatic, as if Rose was some big thing. Which she is, but when she's trying to seem like she's not, its amusing.
| Avarenda chapter 3 . 6/30/2010
Are we surprised by Edward's turnaround? No, not really. It's what he did in canon, after he ran away in for a week, but whose counting right?
I actually find it typical Edward behavior, acting so surprised when it turns out Bella actually has a brain. Oh my! Although i guess i can't fault him too much, considering the times. Still, Rose is an intelligent woman, probably just as capable of a good conversation as Bella, but does he make an effort for her? No. Of course not.
Bella is special.
He can't read Bella, and therefore she is worth more of his time. Not that i can fault him his fascination, but still, its a bit annoying how he seems to dismiss the majority of the female population as 'unworthy'.
When faced with such intensity, I can see why Bella would become so smitten. Really who wouldn't want a handsome, intelligent man who is really really interested in you?
Clever Bella, manipulating Charlie like that, although in retrospect, probably not the smartest move she's ever made.
| Avarenda chapter 2 . 6/30/2010
Well, first off, i probably already mentioned this before; but i really do love the setting of MSR. Not a lot of the fic's I've read have had The Cullens meeting The Swans in 1934.
Not only did you set this back in the 1930's but you also changed the characters to suit the time period. And by characters i mostly mean Bella. Most of the Cullens had that old fashioned feel to them in canon, so i imagine it wasn't much of a stretch in that department.
What i really like about this, is that we get to see Rosalie as a newborn. Well, sorta. I think it takes about five to ten years to leave the newborn stage. And by that i mean, being able to keep from killing everything with a heartbeat in a one mile radius.
Edward's reaction was typical, and expected, but at least he could leave the room this time. Even if he was rude about it.
Funny enough, i can see Charlie fitting very easily into this time period. He just seems like the type of man who would fit right in with the southern hospitality and what not.
Even right off the bat Bella is noticing odd things about the Cullens, but it's really endearing how she always thinks the best of them despite their strangeness. In many ways Bella reminds me a lot of Esme, except minus the doting motherly aspect.
I enjoyed the way Bella reacted in MSR as opposed to in cannon. In canon i think Bella was kinda hurt by Edwards seeming hatred of her, whereas in MSR this Bella is simply annoyed.
At any rate, it was a good first introductory chapter, and is a good setup for what comes after.
| Cissa-Lycoris-Black chapter 55 . 6/10/2010
I'm still loving this story, I've missed it so much *sigh*. Then I couldn't find you and then I emailed and blah blah blah.
Well looking forward to more :).
| jet911 chapter 55 . 5/10/2010
loven the story,cant wait for an update
| Jeo chapter 55 . 4/12/2010
This is my first time reviewing one of your stories. I ask you to keep in mind that English is not my first language, so I apologize in advance.
It always surprises me how you keep bringing notions that I’ve never even considered. For instance how much and why food would smell bad for a vampire.
Anyway, one of the things that I like the most about your story is that this one is entirely written from Bella’s prospect. And it’s not just because I generally dislike stories that keep changing POVS, but it’s because I think Bella it’s just so easy to figure out. I can’t help but think that Rosalie it is just so much more fascinating from this aspect Bella. She just has so many layers.
And I think that it’s because she is so guarded, that this story is better in Bella point of view, since really small details about how Rosalie thinks or feels is all that is given to us, and is up to us to really see and read them.
When I was reading this chapter I noticed that Rosalie is really hard on how Bella sees herself (physically). I can’t help, but feel that Bella inability to see herself as beautiful seems to be the same inability that Rosalie has to see herself as beautiful (internally).
I truly liked this part “And it began to happen, just like I feared ... she was working her magic powers on me, for I didn't see that ratty mop on my head, I started to see something, maybe, that she saw.” I think it showed that Bella is slowly, but surely changing how she sees herself, I just hope that the same will happen to Rosalie. At the very least she is beginning to accept that Rosalie does see her as beautiful.
Once again I apologize for any misspelling or lack of coherence.
Thank you, Jeo
| NandinhaMa chapter 55 . 4/8/2010
I really loved this...
Very original and criative...
| Axciom chapter 55 . 3/6/2010
Sir, I've been reading this thing since day one, and while I was horrified that this story dropped from , it's good to know that you're still carrying it on over here.
I can honestly say this is one of the most in depth character studies I have come across, in any literature, ever. I myself am a better writer because of you, and I have learned things from this work that I wouldn't have gotten from anything else. The dynamic between Bella and Rosalie...words can't describe how appreciative I am that you're doing this. I hope that you keep it up, and I seem to remember a "Book 1" in the header over at twlighted...I sincerely hope there are many more installments to come.
Again, well done sir, keep at it!
| O. N. Labbit chapter 23 . 2/14/2010
I totally agree with you on Emmett. He, by far, was the best guy in the Twilight Cullens. You pegged him perfectly too.
Okay, was Bella drunk? I'm pretty sure she was. Haha, she was a funny drunk.
I loved her telling Rosalie she needed a guy like her. That was so silly. I found myself laughing quite a bit through this chapter.
| O. N. Labbit chapter 22 . 2/14/2010
The dream was fantastically written. Man it's really late and I have to stop reading tonight. I read the next chapter, to see if you let Bella live, and so I'll review that. But then I'm going to call it a night.
Anyway, Bella strangled herself in a sheet? I'm sorry, but that seems kind of funny. lol
I did read "Reminiscence" and loved it. Now that I'm reading this story I don't want Bella to die in a sheet after a scary nightmare.
Anyway, good stuff once again!
| O. N. Labbit chapter 21 . 2/14/2010
I'm really happy with this chapter. It showed that Rosalie really does care. I was happy to see Bella finally just tell Rosalie what she needs. I'm loving how straightforward Bella is in general. She's an awesome little protagonist in this story.
I am just so loving your story.
| O. N. Labbit chapter 20 . 2/14/2010
Sniff... that was so sweet. She held her hand.
I loved that question. It was the perfect question.
Poor Bella is just grasping and grasping to survive. Rosalie is her abductor, her kidnapper, her possible future killer, and Bella just needs her for the most basic of needs: to hold her hand. To be someone to talk to and care.
It's really sad, when you think about it.
I think over that quote by A.A. Milne from the Pooh series, when Piglet wants Pooh to hold his hand because "he just wanted to be sure of him."
Our most basic need - to have another in our life.
Another great chapter!
| O. N. Labbit chapter 19 . 2/14/2010
Rosalie the angel. The cold is so brutal and poor Bella having to face the elements like that.
Honestly, if I was Bella I would have dug a hole behind the cabin and did my thing, and then cover over the hole. For the moment, it would suffice.
Another fantastic chapter!