Reviews for My Sister Rosalie, Book I: Captor
massrie chapter 54 . 12/27/2009

You sly thing! You didn't even hint that I would get to read a chapter of MSR tonight! It's lovely! I'm quite enthusiastic about Bella learning sign language. I suppose the yes/no should have been obvious and I sign to my German Shepherds and use that and "Stop" quite often.

I never thought to teach them potty but I will do so now and see if they can get it. You should see them when I sign stop to them and the whole world comes to a standstill almost as if they forget to breathe.

Its entirely as Rosalie suggested it should be. The world "STOPS" for that sign. Although I generally add "Now" after it

(*Starting from chest area Make a "Y" With both hands, Move the palm-up "Y" hands down a few inches.*)

I am afraid when scripture is quoted for me... well I generally tend to glaze over those parts though I do understand them well enough. I know what she was speaking of to be bathed in light.

As for vampires wanting to play with their food... Well I suppose a great many creatures in the world indulge in food play. Why should vampires be any less.

Thank you! I was ecstatic to come home from a night out and find this chapter. I'm sure I'll reread it in the morning.
GothicPheonix chapter 54 . 12/27/2009
Sorry, I never got the message about this update. Wow...Rosalie just...pulling off her clothes then reciting a passage..very very distracting. But I found the whole Bella challenging Rosalie about if Rosalie would be burned quickly was SO SO funny...because you know then that when Rosalie becomes thoughtful Bella is going to fight her: "“So, if you were torn up into pieces, and fire was ... put on your insides ... well, you’d burn up pretty quickly, wouldn’t you?” I challenged.

Rosalie became thoughtful.

I did not like the look that crossed her face as she thought whatever it was she was a considered pause, she said to herself: “One way to find out.”"

And then Rosalie's statement about being a captive was just so so funny:

“You know, for a captive, you surely take the cake on weirdness: so concerned for her captor’s welfare.” She said this with annoyance in her voice, but I saw just a hint of her fighting her lips from turning upward.

But the sad part was Bella talking to Rosalie about seeing the Volturi kill her. I don't know how you ever found a way to write about talking in sign language.. the way do you watch NCIS, because I have some questions about what Abby is saying to Gibbs in sign language.
Avarenda chapter 54 . 12/26/2009
A good chapter. Funny, informative, and interesting. I kinda wish that Bella had gotten the chance to talk to Rosalie about her dream in more detail.

However i'm going to assume you have a plan for the revelation of information regarding said dream.
MadDelight chapter 53 . 12/22/2009

unfortunately my review didn't get finished as timely as I had hoped. (baking christmas cookies takes up time unfortunately)

But, hopefully (a few hours later) it now will suffice.

Mind games. It's funny, but recently I had to endure some mind games from someone. Not fun. Let me just throw that out there.

Okay, now more into the review:

“No,” Rosalie said, shaking her head. “That’s how people are schooled, but what do they learn in school? Nothing. A person learns something when they answer questions themselves, when they find their own answers."

Too true! people really learn nothing in school. It's all memorize this for the test, pass, and then forget it. That's how most students get by these days. and it really is sad that no one cares to ask questions, or figure out the answers from themselves.

What's more, Rosalie has confidence in Bella and knows she can be smart if she just applies herself.

The hug of course is pure genius! an affection initiated by Rosalie. wow. the tiniest feather could knock me in the gutter.

"She just held me, and the two of us stood by the sink, her, holding me into her."

"and I gave myself over to her and cried."

Bella finally choosing the breakdown? the tears? the vulnerability of it, and letting Rosalie comfort her... or so I perceived.

Have I ever mentioned how your descriptions take my breath away sometimes and get me lost in yours words, because they really do. this section in particular...

"Do you know how when you’re pressed against somebody you can feel their voice vibrating in their chest? I felt almost nothing in her when she spoke. And the way she breathed? It sounded like a wind in a great distance going through a tunnel, like she were a mountain, and she had been hollowed out inside."

“But I wish I hadn’t listened to her. I wish I hadn’t obeyed her in this. For if I had cried, maybe ... maybe I wouldn’t have been so ... maybe I wouldn’t have become ...”

She wouldn't have become... what? So... coldhearted if she had cried... so bitter? so... what? Finish that sentence Rosalie.

But the tear discussion. Crying is so very... humanizing. Don't you think?

"She would open up her heart and let me see the person inside, and then she would just shut me out and be so proper and correct and distant.

But I saw that she was always working so hard when I felt the real her was trying to speak to me, and I saw how easily she could be cold and angry.

Maybe you had to work really hard to peel back that standoffish layer to see the real person inside.

I wonder if anybody had ever worked that hard. Ever."

Sorry for quoting so much. But i feel like giving Bella a pat on the back. She is being so perceptive, she is thinking. and not lost in her dreams, or wallowing in her tiny 'failures'. but now, she is making connections and understanding how Rosalie is.

This would be one of those 'Aha.' lightbulb worthy moments.

“But maybe you are experiencing all this, because learning is painful. Discovering who you are is painful."

Too true, Rosalie, too true.

And a laugh, because there needs to be one in line there that somehow makes me chuckle.

"Hm. ‘Seeing the beautiful butterfly’ sounded suspiciously like mirror time."

no idea about the sign language words, as I have only learned useless holiday ones during my time in high school from a friend or two.

i enjoyed this chapter because I enjoyed bella being able to think, and not being in a state of "near catastrophe" or what-have-you. or messing herself. but she had time to sit back and think, and observe. and it was nice.

I even tiptoed a venture over to Rose by a Lemon Tree. and decided that when i have the time it will be well worth the read.

so, writing-god

i hope this review added a bit of a pick-me-up.

i have nothing but nice things to say about your writing.

massrie chapter 53 . 12/22/2009

please, thank you, yes, and no.

Even if those are not the 4, they should be as it was my beginning vocabulary in sign.

I rather enjoyed that Rosalie was simply being comforting. No hidden agendas no scolding Bella, well not really.

I'm interested to see where the Sign goes. How far she can take it.

And I love Hot Earl Grey Tea. Its probably my favorite tea in the world so it was nice to see that used as well.

But perhaps she will teach her, "bathroom, food, water, and mirror" With Rosalie one can never tell!
AstronautZombieBerndi chapter 53 . 12/22/2009
We had a dog when I was younger called Socrates. Mind you, haha, he was a bit crazy and so Socks jumped the fence one day and never returned. Took after his namesake, because I reckon that in order to be a philosopher, you have to have a little bit of insanity, just to have the desire to question the norm as they do.

I like the explanation you give, here, of Bella's almost chronic tears. One thing I had noticed was her huge shift from a methodical and reasonable person, who went about gathering evidence of Lillian's actual identity, to a blubbering and wholly emotional being. So it was good to see the reasoning behind that change. Sheds a bit of light on why she reacted so strongly and severely to different things, in what I would consider an irrational manner.

Rosalie is initiating more contact between the two of them.

"She reached out and pulled me into her. She placed her hand on my head and gently forced it into her shoulder, nestling it there, her other arm encircled my back, drawing me completely into a solid, gentle, irresistible hug."

That's my favourite part. One, because it's sweet, the offering of comfort, and two, because it's really showing the gradual loss of determination on her part. Don't get me wrong, she's still all 'let's educate the dead girl', but she doesn't need to have such a touchy-feely relationship with her in order to do so.

I gather the sign language is for when Bella has her period. Again, showing that, with Rosalie is intending to keep her around for a while, which is not such a practical decision, she's not being as objective as she should. Slippery slope, Rosalie.

Hey, let's face it, if I were Rosalie, I'd have just killed her when she was wandering haplessly around in the woods. Or let her drown.
GothicPheonix chapter 53 . 12/22/2009
Rosalie is very much into...teaching :)

Mind-games? really Rosalie...even sometimes that can be too much, and pointless. But, I guess in this are right too. And Bella: she really has to stop accusing's not good. Accusing of not speaking to her may have been a bit too far, after all Rosalie is starting to change.

And don't worry this is the only quote I am using because I found this so true, and I know because it has happened to me...except..I was just angry with myself and too...I didn't want to burden anyone or let anyone see how broken I was, or weak. Chrissy, my friend, is like a sister to me; an older sister, and somehow she was always able to break down this wall, just holding me like down below. Actually exactly like below:


She reached out and pulled me into her. She placed her hand on my head and gently forced it into her shoulder, nestling it there, her other arm encircled my back, drawing me completely into a solid, gentle, irresistible hug.

I tried to resist at first. I tried to push away. I couldn’t. This wasn’t me in my dream last night; I didn’t have that kind of strength to equal hers. She just held me, and the two of us stood by the sink, her, holding me into her.

I wanted to be angry at her. I am angry at her. I ha-... that is, I’m so angry with her.

She just said nothing, holding me. She didn’t try to console me with words; she didn’t rock me gently. She just held me.

No. I won’t cry. I won’t!

I gasped in a breath of rose-scented air. The gasp turned into a quiet sob.

So much for not crying. I felt my tears staining her shirt, and I felt the strength of her as she held me, her honeysuckle and rose scent comforting me as much as her embrace, and I gave myself over to her and cried.


This was truly a touching chapter and I loved it. I'm sorry i used a quote...I hoped it wasn't too long. By the way, have you read the Rachel Morgan series. I think you'd like it. And your sister is great with her writings; try and encourage her a little more. I think she feels intimidated, which she shouldn't because she is AMAZING like you :)
Avarenda chapter 53 . 12/21/2009
Wow...Bella's an idiot. I say that with all possible affection, but seriously, Bella's an idiot.

What would be the only time that Bella cannot talk, or even breath? During Bella's period of course. Hence, the need to learn sign language. I swear, Bells is thicker than mud.

On another note, i wonder what parts of the book Rosalie ripped out and threw in the fire. Obviously it was something she didn't want Bella to be tempted to 'sign' to her. So I'm guessing they're either swear words, or something along the lines of 'Take me now you gorgeous beast you!' P Because im so sure ASL has a single sign that encompasses that entire idea right there. Please note the sarcasm.

Actually, im a little surprised that Rosalie HUGGED Bella. I mean, she INITIATED an physical act of comfort/affection! It's a Christmas miracle!

As for guesses into the 'four' signs Rose is going to teach her...

Here's mine:




Help (I'm a little unsure of this one... if it's not book i'm going to guess 'Book' or 'I'm in pain' or simply 'pain')

Do i get a trophy if I'm right? P
MadDelight chapter 31 . 12/16/2009
*Takes a deep breath* Okay. Here goes.

I read all of this (and i mean everything but Chapters 49-52) From 10pm until 3:30-ish in the AM. Chronic insomnia. So I'm going off my sleep deprived memory here.

Enough rambling, about the story...

I have a bit of a tirade and you see it is about Bella...

Never have I ever wanted to know so much about one human's bodily functions. I get it. She's a human, under extreme conditions, she has bathroom er outhouse issues. I get that, really I do.

But must every trip to the outhouse be life or death? No offense Bella, but toddlers wet their pants and it is not an "oh woah is me, life or death all the time" moment. Although, they don't have a ravenous vampire babysitting them, nor the knowledge to be embarrassed. But please Bella please, not another bodily function!

okay... tirade done.

The likes and thought provokers:

Chapter 31: Very possibly my favorite chapter. Hate is good. A powerful emotion. There's a fine line between love and hate, as the adage goes, and this chapter starts off screaming hate.

love it! (no pun intended) and here's why...

i like how Bella (poor fragile, foolish human) screams she hates Rosalie, when in all actuality, it is love she has for the v- er well must not call her that, for Rosalie. If this wasn't already clear as she clings to a sweater. Her sweater! like she needs a piece of Rosalie with her or she would lose it, and the sweater is that piece.

Moving on:

The mirror. The bet.

The fact that Bella can't even look at herself for seven seconds!... Not that i blame her...

(are vampire seconds longer than human seconds? because, you know, they live forever?)

She just breaks down because she can't stand to look at herself in the mirror... and calling herself ugly, that was just wrong. Not what Rosalie wanted her to grasp from the experience. Nosiree-bob.

But standing in front of the mirror, "I felt myself fall onto the floor, convulsing and screaming. I didn't care. "I turned away from it — from me, the monster — and curled up into a ball, whimpering, wracked by sobs.

Rosalie stooped down.

"No, Rosalie, please," I whispered, my voice cracking. She started to turn me toward the ... "NO!" I screamed until I couldn't scream any more.."

Powerful stuff.

...This review is turning into a novel i swear. Okay, a bit more.

From love to hate. Aha! The transition over the fine-line is broken!... if only because Bella believes The Great and Powerful Rosalie will not be returning... but still. It's that love that i've been searching for, and aha here it is. The truth will out, as they say.

"No. I couldn't. If I said I loved her, she would really never come back. Why come back to a crazy girl saying "I love you" who for seven seconds couldn't even ...

But she wasn't coming back, anyway. She was never coming back, and this was the only chance I had to say it, when she still might be able to hear my mind.

Rosalie, I love you."

... "Why come back to a crazy girl saying "I love you" who for seven seconds couldn't even ..."

yes! exactly! why come back at all? Too many stories have instant retribution for this. When a character declares their love its as if everything is fixed. 'I love you!' The fixing things-are-all-better-now words.

But no. This, this is a desperate plea. This is a please-come-back-even-though-this-fixes-and-changes-nothing plea. (a long prefix i might add, ha)

But really. If Bella can't love herself then how can she possibly claim to love another?

Such a human, living on the impulses of "hate" and "love" without thinking thru the reasons behind her declarations. hmph. Wise up, human.

Ah, this hasn't been a commentary on Rosalie (as i had hoped) but rather, Bella. Well, i suppose every human deserves her day...

One last little thing- (chapter 36 This Will Hurt etc) ... slight sexual tension with the washing here? heh. I enjoy picking up on the bits of slightly oozing sexual elements thrown in here or there in chapters or so. what would be life without a bit of sexual tension? Just sayin.

And with that, enough said. Hopefully my review- based on sleep deprived memory, satisfies the writing muse.

with cheers and kindly,

AstronautZombieBerndi chapter 52 . 12/16/2009
Ah, sorry, that review was me. I'll repeat, just in case you don't know which one. Again, sorry

Alright, I'm on top of everything. I'm inordinately proud of myself, now.

You're right when you said that this block of chapters picked up. It did (or, at least, the last half dozen or so did) and it really showed in the speed that I was reading some of them.

Rosalie is seeming much more comfortable with Bella. Maybe comfortable isn't the right word. More...attached to her. The scene where Bella is 'nestled' in Rosalie's embrace really appeals to the romantic sap in me. Very cute.

In chapter 51,

“They’ll become uncomfortable after a while if they stayed like that,”

It should probably be 'They'd', because of the past tense of 'stay', because Rosalie had already rectified the underwear situation.

And in 52,

"I couldn't even let he take a bath in peace, could I?"

He should be Her. I usually don't both with minor corrections, but both are enough of a hiccup to hamper the flow of reading it.

I had read the Rose Read one-shot 'Locks' before this one, but it's an interesting concept that deserves to be explored further, I think. So I'm glad that at least two authors have attempted to do so.

I think I've mentioned that I'm not a huge fan of dream sequences before, but your one in chapter 50 gives a reader a lot to consider. I haven't read your blog posts on the Cullens and their diet, but I do think it interesting that one would be ostracized and hunted due to what they eat, but I suppose with creatures such as vampires, who are so defined by it, it makes a lot of sense. I mean, going against one's nature is the exact same argument used against gays, and is only now beginning to lose sway, after thousands of years. I had previously only really seen the angle where the Volturi was a bit bemused and humoring of the Cullens, where their diet wasn't a reason for attack.

So I'll be reading to see where you go with that thread, in the future.
Jocelyn Torrent chapter 52 . 12/15/2009
So, I think it goes without saying that I quite like this chapter :P Rosalie handled losing her hair so well. It was a real connection, it seemed, between the two girls. Rosalie willingly losing a hair and acting casually about it, sparing Bella's feelings (even though the poor thing still cried about it. She's a cryer, that one) and even going so far as to say that she enjoyed it. Really personal. Really intimate. Well done. Hope that you update when you can :)

Jocelyn Torrent chapter 50 . 12/15/2009




Well, this certainly was an interesting chapter. Damn that foreshadowing, yes. It was kind of sad that you knew it was a dream right off the bat, but still very impactful.

Now, okay, I have to ask. The whole 'releasing the water thing' with Bella. Was Rosalie just...crouching there, letting Bella do whatever or did she help? And the release was it just the release of water or climax too? I was really confused there, as humorous as it was.

Jocelyn Torrent chapter 43 . 12/15/2009
Aw, how cute! Tickling is the best. Especially if it's Rosalie, right? Right. Now, I read, took a break, then started again. Did I miss the chapter where she threw the peanut butter? Because I loved that, really. Such a wonderful expression. It was like the tiniest look at the real rage that wells within Rosalie.

brandyrenae chapter 52 . 12/15/2009
It is certainly interesting how the most obvious things seem to be lost on me. I would never have guessed that Rosalie's hair constantly smells like scotch, it never goes away, even though that is pertty obvious if you really think about it. You always leave me with more to think about after I've read your chapters than before...that is why I keep coming back!
brandyrenae chapter 51 . 12/15/2009
I think it is quite comical when our little no name girl gets 'medicated'. She looses her inhabitions (as most of us do) and it is very funny. I really liked the parts about her kicking Rosalie's butt. All in all a very good/light chapter, even though there were underlying currents of turmoil and heartache.
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