|Reviews for Heart's Home|
| Guest chapter 1 . 7/22
So they used magic to alter their clothes but the bed? Why not conjure more beds? The I only have one bed idea is stupid for witches and wizards.
| Indecisive Bob chapter 5 . 7/20
Excellent story! This was a very nice and mostly relaxing read. The ending was a tiny bit abrupt, but not horribly so. Thank you for sharing your work with us!
| Guest chapter 5 . 3/31
I... have no words. This story is too awesome to describe with English vocabulary. Tears were shed, that's for sure.
| DragonTamer01 chapter 5 . 3/19
This story WAS good, but it wasn't great. The main reason for it was because the pacing of the story, to me at least, felt INCREDIBLY sluggish. It just seemed to progress a little too slow for my tastes.
| birthofthecool chapter 5 . 1/20
Great story. I loved it and want to qualify my earlier review insofar that the criticism was only part of a much bigger package of reactions, which were rather positive.;)
I'm slightly disappointed that there was no wedding night in the story, after it seemed to have been dangled in front of me for quite some time, but given the emotional centre of this story, it wasn't really necessary.
| birthofthecool chapter 3 . 1/20
While I do like this story a lot and it speaks to my mushy, soft side, I do have to raise a few small points of criticism.
Even for someone who likes fluff as I do, you are simply over-doing it.
A bit less crying and emotions, a few less dear-hearts and Mione-loves would go a long way to keep this story from drifting into bad romantic novel territory, as well as quite a bit less of stilted and archaic language, that you probably see as poetic, but does seem a bit ridiculous when thinking about this being actual dialogue, supposed to be spoken by your characters.
And sorry, but having the Grangers be so supportive and welcoming Harry and Luna into their family BEFORE they even patch things up, that was plain wrong.
Hermione's mother was fuming with rage and the next morning she talks with Harry as if everything had already been settled.
Just letting them have their little conversation after clearing things with Hermione would have fixed most of this, however it would still feel a bit too rushed and forced that it didn't take more than a day for the Grangers to get this accepting to her daughters lovers.
Sometimes it's really important to pace your stories more realistically as it is hard for some readers to accept stuff like this if they are hurried.
| Bladre MKT chapter 5 . 12/3/2014
im trully impressed at how ya didnt just beat a poor dead horse and just asumed herm and luna could "work it off" and that the heart bond could make ALL ok... ya actually went with a triangle relationship and a gigant chunck of character develoment! it just works so well is almost scary! i really did enjoy it. thanks a lot
| Arial Wolf chapter 5 . 11/24/2014
Most wondrous tail
Brilliant thank you
| Books85 chapter 5 . 4/18/2014
I really liked this story. In some ways it echoes one of my favorite scifi/fantasy books; Dreamsnake by Vonda McIntyre. I think it came out in the early 70s (but it could have been before.) I am not accusing you of plagiarism; but the idea of using a menage a trois to heal... that happen in Dreamsnake, too.
I have enjoyed your writing and hope that you continue some day.
Thank you! MHS
| DylanL chapter 5 . 4/13/2014
Nice story. I will say though that from a stand point of reading this after completion, I really don't like the chapter formating and wish u had done a bunch of smaller chapters instead. However if I was reading this when it was a WIP I would very much appreciate such long posts. Other than that and some minor comma errors u did a really good job with it
| willowskeith chapter 5 . 4/9/2014
| Guest chapter 4 . 4/2/2014
I like Melvil. That's a great idea. Which brings to mind the fact that there are a LOT of great ideas that should have been expressed as magical constructs, but which JKR was not imaginative enough to come up with.
This is a most heart-warming story. Thanks for writing it.
| Concolor44 chapter 5 . 4/2/2014
Heh. Yeah the characters can take over the plot, and leave you as little more than a glorified stenographer. I know they do me that way. But Evan and Robyn are truly worthy people, and when you have folks like that in your story, you need to let them have their say.
An all-around excellent tale. Luna's development was well-paced and believable, and "the woman she could become" is someone I would really like to get to know.
Given the intimacy and intensity available through their bonds and ties, I think their honeymoon is going to register on the Richter Scale.
Very nice work. Thank you so much for sharing!
| Concolor44 chapter 1 . 3/30/2014
In your author's note you admitted that there might be a few spelling and grammar errors left in the final product. I'd make that a few hundred. They get pretty thick in places, but were only actually troublesome four or five times. A good beta-reader would not go amiss.
Okay, that being said, the story ITSELF is impressive. The "heart's home" concept is a really beautiful one, and you've done it well here. I can also see Harry having a REALLY GOOD TIME down the road.
| Dayjor chapter 3 . 1/22/2014
Really like this story, but two suggestions. First, add Hermione to the character list; second, I'm a little confused about the insistence that Harry and Luna must go back to England, so maybe explain that a little better.