Reviews for A Protector
tpel chapter 2 . 1/1/2009
The story is definitely starting to pick up at the end of the second chapter. Azulia is a bit Mary-Sue for my tastes, but in the second chapter you started using her to show something about Jane, and that was intriguing. I liked how he shut down completely when she suggested staying at his place.

I think you have Jane's "voice" down pretty well, but watch out for Rigsby (you left out the 'b' in his name, by the way): on the show he did tease Lisbon once - he told her she was blushing when Jane pretended to read her mind. But that was a quick, passing, jab, and then he walked away. You have him acting very familiar with her, punching her on the shoulder, etc. I'm not sure that's quite the right vibe for the character. I see him as more defferential toward his boss. Anyway, something to think about.
langfieldl chapter 2 . 1/1/2009
The story is coming along nicely! I really enjoying it! Keep up the good work!
JelloFanatic123 chapter 2 . 1/1/2009
I think that the story is going really good so far! The last part was pretty intense but I still liked it! And I loved the first part of Rigsby saying they are in a secret relationship! Can't wait to see how you fit Jibson into the story next! I live for Jibson! Great Writing!
mwalter1 chapter 2 . 1/1/2009
Story is shaping up nicely! I like the characters and dialog Looking forward the Jisbon! :-)
Horsegrad13 chapter 2 . 1/1/2009
i slept while my puppy barked his head off at fireworks the downside of living right outside the city limits with 3 fireworks stands on the nearest corner
piraticalifornia chapter 2 . 1/1/2009
Pretty good. Wo, is she psychic? :)

Looking forward to Jisbon :D

(And in the first few minutes of 2009, I was cheering, drinking, and doing The Hustle [weird friends])
Wizard-in-Disguise chapter 2 . 1/1/2009
Characterization was beautiful. You captured Jane and Lisbon's personality very well. I could imagine Rigsby and Cho playing cards with each other but I can't see a Van-Pelt nodding off in my mind. xD

Azulia is incredibly interesting. I can't wait to see more of her!

My first minutes of 2009 were spent sleeping. xD I don't bother about the New Year thing. I think the New Year really is near September, when school starts and you start off fresh. D

Happy New Years!


Lerrinus chapter 1 . 1/1/2009
So far, so good! I think you've got everyone down but I'd like another chapter just to make sure! ;-)
mylittlehazmat chapter 1 . 12/31/2008
Saying you want this many number of reviews is just putting a price on your own writing. And honestly, it usually turns me off reviewing, or even reading someone's work.

Don't take this as a criticism of your work, I enjoyed reading your story, even if the main character seems a little Mary-Sue ish. Although, who else is the greatest Mary-Sue of all, but Patrick Jane? P

Hopefully, you'll update soon, without feeling the need to do it because there are this many people reading it.


langfieldl chapter 1 . 12/31/2008
Sounds intersting! Keep up the good work and update soon!
superwoman1015 chapter 1 . 12/31/2008
You can' just leave it there. I would love to see how he solves this.
ravenfiremagick chapter 1 . 12/31/2008
Whoa, that was amazing. She is extremely unique. I actually know someone alot like her. Loving the story. More please?
mwalter1 chapter 1 . 12/31/2008
Great start! Hm, is she a real psychic or really good at reading people? I want to read more!
Wonderfalling chapter 1 . 12/31/2008
Sounds like this is going to be a very interesting character interaction...Looking forward to the next chapter!

Keep up the good work,

Wizard-in-Disguise chapter 1 . 12/31/2008
Sounds incredibly interesting!

This chapter is absolutely perfect. xD I couldn't find any grammar mistakes and the writing was smooth, connecting every word in an effortless manner.

Azulia seems a lot like Jane. It's creepy. Perhaps this is the teenager version of Jane's daughter. xD

Anyway, fantastic chapter! Can't wait for the next update.


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