|Reviews for PS: Vivio|
| DuoDezma chapter 1 . 12/16/2013
I just wanted to say that this story is amazing. I like when stories can make adult or matureish themes a key element yet not make them the focus of the story. to maintain the fine line between key elements and focus of the story is and has been my weak point. I praise you for your skill and balance. Not many authors make my favorites.
| Evan chapter 10 . 9/17/2013
Hello It's Me Again. In Sorry For Posting Two Reviews But I Want To. Again I Love Your Story And Everything But And Im Sorry To Say This But Aunt Hayate Is Not Fair :( Vivio Can Do Whatever The Hell She Wants! I Dont Know Maybe Im Not Getting The Message But Still... I Have Questions! She Goes Back To Live With Syn Right?! Anyway Im Sorry For Bitching. It's A Verry Great Story! I Love It And All But I Am Just Unsatisfied. Please Make A Sequel. Have Them Get Married And Move Into A Good House! :D
| Evan chapter 10 . 9/17/2013
The Story Was Very Good. I Loved It. I Just Don't Understand The Ending Where Vivios Aunt Is Talking To Just Thinking If Vivio Quits Her Job And Leaves Syn Because Her Aunt Dident Like It. I'm Sorry But Im Not Satisfied. Maybe It's Just Confusion I Don't Know. Good Story Nonethless.
| RCN chapter 1 . 11/16/2012
Great. now every times i see a sweet little girl like vivio, i think of the possibility of them becoming a pornstar.
| YFIQ chapter 1 . 10/22/2012
Porn is where broken hopes and dream goes to live.
| mllhild chapter 10 . 12/21/2011
This is a review I wrote some time ago and did never came to post.
Yes I do write them offline and I do also read the story's usually in Word and not on the page.
Again you did give me the joy of laughing strong enough to fall from the chair and also to cry for hours without being able to stop. For this I thank you immensely.
About the crying. First I have to state that besides when reading manga or watching anime I don’t cried for years and even when it was with anime or manga it only lasted a little after the the end of the scene and never forced me to stop watching. Now while reading the ending scene of your story I cried normaly, but at around 1/3 of the story I started crying without stopping and had to stop reading for around 3 hours. The interesting part is why it happened.
First I read the short story “PornStar! Vivio” and a few days later I saw the story “PS: Vivio” (I didn’t associated PS to PornStar) and on the description I thought that it were a story written in form of a sequence of letters written to or by Vivio talking about here live when here mothers died (alone from the description it was obvious that they died because otherwise there wouldn’t be a hard live for Vivio).
I thought it where letters because in Germany (yes I’m German) “PS:” is used to write a thought at the end of a letter if you already had finished it.
Now after I started reading I noticed that it weren’t letters and the thought when away. Or so I believed. In reality it went to the back of my mind and continued there. Then it came back at some point with an image. It was on a battlefield where leaned dying against some debris was Fate writing a letter to Vivio. From the details in the image was clear that Nanoha was already dead. And when the letter was finished Fate decided to write one more sentence. She did write two words and died with the sentence only completed in her mind.
Written was “ PS: Vivio … be brave ”.
This was an image in my mind and it kept flashing for hours, during this time also appeared some different versions of the image but always with the letter and showing either that Nanoha and Fate were dead or implied it. So this did keep me crying for 3 hour and after wards every time when I think again about the image. For example I cried the whole time while writing the description.
I did resume the images at the end of this text. They are somewhat in sequence so if you are interested you can read them. Actually I would love to paint them but I stopped painting a year ago and even so I was never good enough to bring pass emotions through my images (besides I’m on time pressure for my final semester exams for my collage, in fact I should be studying instead of writing this, but I just can’t go on without putting this down first).
Now going on to the next point. Somehow I never thought about images from the time when Vivio was a call-girl, my mind simply had problems imagining a depressed, starving and rundown Vivio.
All in all I had some problems imagining the visual image of Vivio screwing people (the person in my mind ended up being more a generic blonde than exactly Vivio with the look of a porn actress) since the traces from the anime where she is shown as adult are difficult to convert into a sexy image of her, but maybe this is just lack of practice on my site.
Did you write the story before the end of the airing of StrikerS ? because it shows at the end that the 6th Mobile Division was dissolved after the JS incident.
Somehow Syn end up always having nearly the same appearance as Einhard from MSLN Vivid since I’m a fan from the Vivio/Einhard pairing. It’s nearly because the face is somewhat more Subaru like just a little more experienced but still with the same lust to live.
If you know someone willing to paint one of these images (my favorite is the first or a variation of it) please upload it somewhere and tell me about it.
If you read until here, Thank you again for hearing me out.
Image 1 (actually 1 to 5):
Fate sitting on the ground leaned against some debris. She’s has written a letter on her lap and is in the moment of her death. After finished she decides to add final sentence but dies after the two first words, the sentence only completed in her thought. “ PS: Vivio … be brave ” .
-Background may be at the end of a battle with their allies struggling to defend themselves
-Letter must be written on paper
-Fate heavily wounded
-Indications of Nanohas death:
obroken Raising Hart in fates hand or around her neck
o Nanohas ribbon blood-soaked in Fates hand, wrest or hair and with a blood pattern opposite to the rest on Fate so that it will be noticed
-Please in renascence style (means Fate must have either a tranquil simile or a face which shows sadness but also hope)
oSmile because she will go meat Nanoha again
oSadness for not being able to embrace Vivio again
oHope that Vivio may live on and live brave life
o1º the background is a hospital (make adjustments in Fates aperients)
o2º Nanoha lies dead in Fates lap while Fate is writing
o3º Nanoha and Fate lie both dead (idyllic) on the ground holding on to each other and the letter lies near them on the ground
o4º Nanoha and Fate lie both dead (idyllic) on the ground holding on to each other and the letter is taken by the wind. The perspective is from air view from where the position of the letter and as the paper fly’s past the viewer’s eye only the “ PS: Vivio “ is clearly readable.
Fate and Nanoha embrace each other waiting for the impact of an attack and their last thought is written below them “ PS: Vivio … be brave ” being the “be brave” part thought while dying. And there is a “PS:” in front of it since the thought is like a goodbye letter.
The letter lies in the dirt and is lightly damaged.
-Optional there could be:
othe ribbons (with or without blood)
othe ribbons could be touching each other
oinstead of ribbons there could be broken Racing Hart and Bardiche
oother option would be the hands of Nanoha and Fate touching each other but then it would be necessary to be able to identify at first look that it are their hands
Vivio when she receives the letter and hear crying out into the world. The cry should be childlike, showing how she’s hurt and lost in an emptiness in her mind.
Vivio sitting/kneeling in front of the tombstones of her mothers with the hands clasp together and the two white feathers flying in the wind.
-Viewpoint is from the white flying feathers (around 45º to the horizon).
-The tombstones in front of Vivio.
-Don’t forget the flowers she brought.
-Check the scrip for clothing references.
Someone enters Hayate’s office and sees the pictures from all here Guardian Knights and friends. Sigmund, Vita, Shamal, Zafira, Rein, Subaru, Tea, Caro, Erio and a image of Nanoha with Fate and Vivio. Alongside with a autographed poster from Eyes.
XP as if the cosplay queen could resist to Vivio in her Fetish costumes.
| touchofstyle chapter 10 . 4/22/2011
i love just how natural and normal this feel
| ZonaRose chapter 10 . 12/21/2010
WOW that was GREAT. Wow...I need to apologize to you as I didn't think I would like this one. Boy was I wrong! Thank you for this. Now I feel like re-reading some of your stuff again. ;) On to more NanoXFate goodness.
| RatSkie chapter 5 . 12/20/2010
I knew this would happen! That Syn would really get mad after Vivio's revelation but still it was still pretty sad my chest actually tightened! Because of what happened at the end, I right away made this review! Good job, Satashi-san! And I meant that in a good way.
| yurimylove chapter 10 . 4/18/2010
Well Satashi-sama... your story has made me want to date a porn star XD
Haha just kidding. But seriously, I really enjoyed reading this story. I feel that it's a very intelligently written, heart-warming story about two likable, and very realistically portrayed characters. Vivio and Syn, they literally walk out of the page in flesh and blood. Their feelings, emotions, and love for each other are well conveyed and utterly convincing. Beside our two protagonists, I also love Syn's mother Elena. She's loving and understanding, and she has given Syn some really wise advises when she needed them.
What I found most impressive about this story, is how maturely it handles the various relationship issues. Rarely outside of fairy tales, do two people just fall in love at first sight and ride off to the sunset for a happily-ever-after life (after slaying some dragons, perhaps). Learning to accept the one you love for who they are, to appreciate their virtues as well as to tolerate their shortcomings - because no one is perfect, and to work out differences with openness and mutual trust, these are some of the most difficult aspects of real-world relationships. It was heart-wrenching to see Syn breaking up with Vivio upon learning of her profession, but it's a very believable emotional response for someone in her shoes. But her love for Vivio was strong enough for her to be willing to give their relationship a second chance, by learning more about Vivio's work and her reasons for getting into porn. I really love Syn for being so understanding and trusting in her lover, when she realized that she is the one special to Vivio, and porn is just work for her. At the same time, I also respect Vivio's determination to make their relationship work, compromising on whatever it takes - even including important career moves. I'm so glad to see that their efforts have paid off in the end and their relationship has really blossomed.
The last chapter also provides some nice closure to Vivio's emotional baggage from her past. It is a very touching scene. I'm happy that she's able to reconcile with her "extended family" and get to enjoy the holiday with them and Syn's family, in the truest spirit of Thanksgiving.
| Dark Knight Gafgar chapter 7 . 11/4/2009
I was going to try to read all the way through this before reviewing, but I don't think I can finish this. The writing itself is fine: there are occasional typos and grammar errors, but nothing too noticeable.
The problem is the plot.
I'll be honest, if blunt. You might as well have changed Vivio's name and a few things about her physical description and published this as an original story. Or replaced her with pretty much any other female anime character ever. For all that this is supposedly a Nanoha fanfiction, it fails to have anything in common with the series.
There's no use of magic whatsoever (especially by Vivio, one of the strongest mages in the series even at the age of five), and in fact the fic seems to heavily imply that the action is taking place on Earth, which makes one wonder why Vivio didn't contact Nanoha's parents at some point. Indeed, no MGLN characters aside from Vivio and - only in barely-mentioned passing - Nanoha and Fate appear. How two of the Three Aces died (and in a manner that somehow made Vivio swear off becoming a TSA mage) is never revealed. What the rest of her extended family is doing is never revealed. And, most damningly...
Vivio is the reborn Sankt Kaiser. The genetic reincarnation of a major Midchildan religion's GOD. Her magic capacity is enormous, and the TSAB cuts her benefits and sends her away? And a major religion doesn't say or do anything when their living diety is forced into poverty and, eventually, adult entertainment? There are no explanations given for these events. You mentioned that Vivio swore off TSAB service due to her parents' never-explained deaths, it should have been easy to add that she swore off magic or it was otherwise sealed away at that point. Something could've been said about the Church of the Sankt Kaiser's reaction, but again they might as well not have existed.
In the end this isn't a Nanoha fic that centers on Vivio Takamachi. This is an original work that centers on an original character, who just so happens to be named Vivio Takamachi and vaguely resembles her in appearance - if nothing else - and following a generic romance plot full of cliches. Very disappointing.
Two stars out of five.
| Fuyu no Sora chapter 10 . 4/25/2009
So, as I promised you before, here's my full review on this chapter.
The story is definitely loyal to your usual style and I do not know whether it's because I'm a bit partial or because it's been so long since I read the fragmented version, but it didn't really seem like it was a 60-part fic from my point of view. Some parts where a bit awkward in the transition but overall I think it's a very well structured fic. My opinion on it anyways.
As for the chapter itself...wow. I didn't expect the few changes you made to the original to make it so much more emotional than it was before being revamped. The emotions portrayed by the characters, mainly Hayate, where almost tangible and it's very easy to relate to the brown-haired commander's feelings upon realizing her niece is an adult entertainer. The most powerful line in the whole story has to be [“You're my little girl!” Hayate interrupted, shaking her head and speaking quickly. “I want you back, I want to look after you, like they wanted me to!”]; I almost felt overwhelmed by the emotion I could almost touch at that line. I'm sure Hayate wished she could go back in time and lock the girl up so she would never lead the kind of life she did, but as Vivio herself pointed out, Nanoha and Fate would've been proud of her for not giving up...even if they would have been dismayed at the girl's career, *chuckles*. Dismayed indeed...
Well, that's all from me for now.
| Honulicious chapter 10 . 4/21/2009
i don't know what it is...maybe just pure talent! but your stories are always soo AWESOME! this was definitely a nice heart warming story about vivio. great character building! i am very sad that it has ended but happy with your endding. can i say epilogue? :P
you write really well, you should really think about being a real author...ha maybe you already are one.
thank you for another great story! i hope to read another one of yours!
| FuryouMiko chapter 10 . 4/21/2009
I was looking forward to this chapter (even though it took me a couple of days to find time to read it!) and it met my expectations. I was hoping for some awkwardness, some reconciliation, maybe some drama and I got them all.
Plus, that last bit was really sweet... Even if it did feel like the end.
| litokid-2 chapter 10 . 4/20/2009
That was nice...glad to see you didn't go with having her family just accept it. It makes no sense for them to do so, but a lot of people would've done it to make everything a happy-go-lucky ending.
The domestic scene with Elena was amusing and made me smile - intentional or not, though, I was always waiting for the other shoe to drop.
So "privacy laws" are what prevented them from finding her...that kind of works, but seems a bit thin to be honest. Somehow, I don't see any of Mobile Section 6 - Vita 'specially - giving a damn about the law when one of their own might be in danger. Vivio particularly, as the young girl entrusted to them by their departed friends.