|Reviews for The Problem with Purity|
| SilentButDeadly chapter 9 . 4/12
So Hermione wakes up with Harry's head between her tits?
| Guest chapter 1 . 4/7
Thanks for the story. It's long but engaging. I'm not sure where all the criticism comes from. It has reasonable pace (esp for length, likeable characters who come across as flawed/human), and some excellent ideas. Yes, there are miscommunicationsbut they are plausible, yes it won't be everyone's ideal story, yes some themes have been used before but there are a limited number of themes in anyone's imagination. It's well worth a read, and has inspired me to look for anything else by the author.
Thank you for your hard (& underappreciated) work.
| steampoweredguy chapter 14 . 4/2
Snapes attempt s at being nice. To Hermione just make him come across creepy. I take it the present thing is a plot red herring?
| very bad fairy chapter 22 . 4/2
No it isn't. Snape/Hermione plot is half baked, often jumps out of nowhere and he's unnecessarily nasty to her. Any1 wondering why this is getting many posts and coverage on social media, its because that trolling idiot and QPR supporter Justin Walsh has started a flame war with Nicola C's group that's turned childish and nasty. Ignore them or find a better story to berate
| alemer88 chapter 62 . 4/1
I was a little unsure about starting this work of fanfiction because it was over 600k words, but I am so glad I have it a chance. This is by far one of THE BEST SS/HG I've ever read!
| Afroatemydoy chapter 4 . 3/27
Why is everyone ranting and raving about this on reddit, twitter and fb? An okay story but is it worth all those posts in captials? hardly.
| Guest chapter 62 . 3/23
| Parody chapter 5 . 3/21
why pick on Colin? Rwally unfair
| Guest chapter 62 . 3/20
Very enjoyable story! Somewhat drawn-out in some places, but I guess that just made the happiness all the more satisfying. Also, if I didn't know any derivative of the word "circumspect," I certainly do now haha.
| FYI chapter 1 . 3/18
for your information
You lot do realize that the 17-03-2018 hackattack that downed fanfiction dot net was entirely focused on wiping all Drarry stories? Just shows the haters might actually be right
| JellyToastx chapter 62 . 3/17
All I can say, after reading this incredible story, is WOW! Despite being the longest piece of fanfiction I have ever read, there was never a dull moment in this. It really keeps you interested all throughout. I loved your version of defeating Voldy, I thought it was extremely creative. And of course Hermione's relation to Salazar. Thank you so much, for giving me the chance to completely fall in love with this story.
| Guest chapter 62 . 3/13
I think that last reviewer has hit nail on head, and far more eloquently than I ever could. I did in end binge read this and was left scratching my head over characterization of both the relationships. A full rewrite plus editing down of text would help loads. Never happening tho.
| Ambrosia19 chapter 3 . 3/15
Majority isn't maturity.
Majoritymost of sth.
| The Random Reader and the Wolf chapter 62 . 3/13
I don't usually leave (somewhat) negative reviews. I also realise that you wrote this almost ten years ago and, if you've kept on writing, you must have improved a lot. But, after spending so many days reading this story and immersing myself in it, I feel that I should share my thoughts here.
The first and most important thing is: I agree with you. You should have let your inner editor out more. The main problem with this story is precisely the lack of editing: roughly three-quarter parts of the text could be scrapped without contemplation. There's way too many summaries and descriptions of mundane, repetitive tasks interspersed in-between the actual scenes, and they make the story very tedious, like it's been extended artificially. Yellow Horse's review in chapter 7 explains this very well. When you actually get down to the action, the flow is good, so cutting out the unnecessary parts would improve the fic greatly.
The second biggest issue is characterization. You have a good clasp of the English language. You have good plot ideas. But character interactions fall flat. Most of the storyline and character development relies too much on characters misunderstanding each other, overreacting spectacularly or generally behaving as immature children. They just don't react to things the way that real people do. So this aspect of the story needs work.
The third biggest problem, in my opinion, is directly tied to the second: Hermione and Snape's relationship is not believable. At all. In fact, as many other reviewers have already said, theirs is a clear example of an abusive relationship. For roughly 80% of the fic, you portray Snape as a one-dimensional demon who's set out to make Hermione's life hell. He hurts her deliberately at every opportunity, abuses his power over her and even tries to torture and kill her. The way that you write him, with no redeemable traits whatsoever, there's absolutely no way that Hermione could still love him and be in a sane, healthy relationship with him. Their coming together at the end is not realistic, considering all the previous abuse.
WeirdLittleStories explained it better (and more succinctly) in their review for chapter 36. Any person with some background in psychology or feminism would be able to point it out straight away. I realise that you didn't do it on purpose, but this isn't a healthy relationship at all, and the way that Hermione constantly tries to appease Snape and overexplains herself at every opportunity is really, really painful to read.
That isn't to say that there's nothing salvageable about this story. On the contrary: many reviewers have expressed their enthusiasm for it, and for good reason. There's no way I would've finished the story if I wasn't interested in the plot. I genuinely enjoyed many parts of it, particularly when Hermione shocks everyone in some unexpected way, or when you introduce interesting ideas and scenes such as her Potions examination or warding magic. Also, in contrast, the relationship between Harry and Draco is much better portrayed and, despite some arguments and misunderstandings, one can truly believe that they love each other in the story. I also know that my 13-year-old self would have found absolutely nothing wrong with this fic. But, despite the good parts, it's still in desperate need of an editor and it encourages toxic relationships, which is something that I can't endorse.
Most of these are novice mistakes and could be remedied with time and experience. If you've kept on writing, then I'm sure that you must have already gotten over many of them. If you still write romances, I encourage you to read up on sensitivity readers. They're generally used to respectfully portray non-white or non-sexually normative characters, but they're also great to spot gender-related issues that you may have missed in your writing (as a fellow writer, I know very well how hard it can be to be objective with your own work!).
Best of luck and thanks for sharing the story.
PS: It seems that, for some reason, there's been many new reviewers on this fic lately? I must say that in my case it's a coincidence, though. I was having a look at the most reviewed Hermione/Snape fanfics on ffnet and I realised that I had (somehow) missed this one.
| color esperanza chapter 62 . 3/12
I really enjoyed reading your beautifully written story! Thanks for your time and the engery you put into writingAs for your request one or two chapters ago.. I am from Austria