|Reviews for Small Town Trouble|
| NA chapter 1 . 8/7/2013
Instead of giving a review using silly terms used by immature children, I've decided to provide a constructive critique. I hope you take it in the good intent it was meant.
First off, this was truly a wonderful story with an excellent plot. The interactions between Draco and Harry were truly amusing, enticing, and captivating. I think you managed to portray the two leading characters exceedingly well.
Obviously, you had major formatting issues with chapter one, and throughout the story some common spelling errors and misused terms constantly came about. Were I you, I would pay keen attention to your reviewer, "Sheri Contrary," whom I think has hit the target directly with her review.
Another distraction was the change in Point Of Views. While I can understand during Harry's P.O.V, him referring to Draco as "Malfoy," it made little sense during Draco's P.O.V. for Draco to think of himself as "Malfoy." When dealing with a character's point of view, you should use the person's first name. For this reason, it was difficult to differentiate between Harry's and Draco's POV when you kept using the same name (Malfoy).
All in all, this was truly an amazing story. I love Harry and Draco working together undercover. I love that the majority of the scenery occurred in the Muggle world. Above all else, I LOVE the dialogue between Draco and Harry: the teasing, the sarcastic sardonic words, the stuttering, etc. I enjoyed this tremendously.
| Sheri Contrary chapter 2 . 12/24/2011
Sooooooooooo glad chapter two is a bit easier to read. Cindy sure seems nice. Yay for neighbors!
| Sheri Contrary chapter 1 . 12/24/2011
You're missing something here...QUOTATION MARKS and APOSTROPHES! How does something like this even happen? VERY hard to read without them.
And, you seem to have an issue with than/then...you keep using then when you should be using than. Use than for comparisons (Such and such is more THAN something else)...use then in if/then situations (If she uses quotations marks, THEN everyone will be happy). I've read some of your other stories and you do the same thing in them too...this is highly distracting.
And, your/you're are two different words. Your is possessive (Is this your shirt?) You're is the contraction of you are (Well, like it or not, you're in this as deep as I am now). You keep using your when you mean you're. It's driving me crazy!
Liked the end of the chapter though...cute! On to chapter two...sure hope you've found the quotation mark key. *sigh*
| rtag chapter 1 . 6/11/2010
The lack of quotation marks really hurt this chapter. Glad to see the next one had them. Might be a good idea to go back and add them, so as to not drive off new readers. I'm enjoying the story!
| kowabungabrittany chapter 6 . 3/17/2010
i truly enjoyed this story. you really did a wonderful job. the ending was not at all what i had expected, actually, i had no clue what to expect, but cindy being evil hadn't even crossed my mind. so you did a good job springing that out without giving anything away previously. i'm so happy that harry and draco figured things out at the end. it's so cute when they get over their silly selves and do that :)
anywho, you did a lovely job :)
| kowabungabrittany chapter 4 . 3/17/2010
woah. you really know how to get things going! gosh :)
i'm loving this story more and more. you have a talent here!
| kowabungabrittany chapter 3 . 3/17/2010
harry's quick thinking was sure fun. hahaa.
| kowabungabrittany chapter 2 . 3/17/2010
aw. draco is already protecting harry. cute. hahaa, i'm really liking this so far :)
| kowabungabrittany chapter 1 . 3/17/2010
hahahaa! newlyweds! nice :)
| JustineAme chapter 6 . 8/5/2009
I loved this story! it was just simply great! I was gonna leave a long review but i'm far to tired to do so, just know that I loved it! You did and amazing job! The characters and the town were great and the evil guy was creepy and funny at the same time, I loved it! You rock!
| Smokes chapter 6 . 8/5/2009
I really enjoyed this fic...nice concept. I do love the pretend relationship plot...never fails to make me smile. And your lemon was great, no worries.
| Zara Riddle chapter 6 . 8/1/2009
I loved this, it reminded me of this movie I haven't seen in years but totally love. Great story line and I just loved that part with the police officer.
| Nagini Potter chapter 6 . 7/31/2009
Wow. . . that was fantastic! It was a VERY original story. I would have liked a more lemony scene in the end, but it was a satisfying ending. I did notice a few gramatical errors every so often, but the story was so good I didn't mind at all.
| Micuko chapter 6 . 7/31/2009
ok, this fic was amazing! I loved it so much it was funny, interesting, hot... wow.
| ShatteredSig chapter 6 . 7/30/2009
It was just right. I loved it.