Reviews for No More Forgiveness |
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![]() ![]() And right off the bat you're operating off incorrect information. Goku didn't get revived by Shenron because he COULDN'T BE. A person can only be resurrected by the Earth Dragon Balls once, they even ask Shenron and he replied that Goku has already been brought back from the dead already and couldn't do it again. |
![]() ![]() ![]() LOLnatural death of the tissue, by that logic no one could ever by revived by the Dragon Balls. Sorry, it's natural to die if your heart gets destroyed, even if the dragon puts the heart back, the rest of the body tissue still died naturally. Sorry, it's natural to die when blown up into pieces, even if the dragon puts the pieces back together, the pieces of Krillin died a natural death. It's strange that you changed this from a Gohan/Goku feud fic to a Videl/Gohan torture fic. |
![]() ![]() ![]() i understand this is a fiction where gohan feels like this, in my opinion is not really goku's fault, chichi tricked him into marriage and he accepted because he made a promise, his true love was always fighting, the only family he had as a child was his grampa that he acidentally killed while in the ozaru form, so he didn't had a family for most of his life, you trick someone that does not understand what marriage is, what family is, and all he knows is the primal instinct of species that is fighting and you expect him to be a great husband and father? thats just dumb |
![]() ![]() ![]() It would be a really good fanfic, but again you make Gohan do everything. Goku at this point did nothing to solve the Problem, no he is gone, training uub again and again. And Gohan has to search for him, to talk to him, Goku is like: Well, I dont care about my family. At this point, there cant be a solution, because Goku isnt even trying anything. |
![]() ![]() ![]() kudos this was a really enjoyable read |
![]() ![]() This is a very different fanfiction. When Gohan and Goku are write people just make Gohan worship Goku or make Gohan jealous of Goten getting attention of their father, almost nobody write Gohan being hurt by Goku or wanting to keep distance. I wish there were more couragerous writers like you. Today people get a fit in the fandom if someone is critical of Goku parenting. Very good story. Also very realistic everybody trying to make these two reconciliate first thinking Gohan is being too dramatic like they dont really know what he has being throw. Very original and well though story. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Everyone's vocabulary... Besides a few members of the gang I don't see anyone talking so formal... especially not Goku |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oh, ¿cómo describir todo esto que siento? Fue una lectura espléndida, maravillosa... Quedé impresionada por la cantidad de emociones que surgieron en mi corazón con cada capítulo que leía. Podía entender el dolor de Gohan, a su vez, comprender a Goku; su relación fue inusual desde la infancia del chico, y que nunca se haya hablado de lo que sucedió fue el declive de la misma. La catarsis que vivió Gohan, así como el punto final que puso por el bien de su familia y de él mismo fue abrumador. Como dices, no siempre existen los finales felices, y a veces eso es lo mejor para ello. Gracias por compartir una experiencia maravillosa. |
![]() ![]() Ok, you must think I'm crazy, and I'll leave you alone after this. What mean by chopping up certain texts is the HUGE paragraphs that can be chopped up. It looks like you improved a lot over the years. |
![]() ![]() Alright, scratch that, you do do this, just not as much as you might need to. Also, try to chop up some of the text, it makes the story easier to read. |
![]() ![]() This is a good story, but you don't have a lot of characters doing physical action during there dialogue. It's more like: "You're dad and I have some things we need to work out," Goku stated. But there's no physical action to accompany it, no way for the character to pop off the page. "You're dad and I have some things we need to work out," Goku stated and began to rub his granddaughter's back as she tightened her hold in the embrace. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I wondered how many times you could milk Videl getting injured/sick. This story was great initially, it had all the feels and you could really understand and sympathize with Gohan... then you decided to use the same thing, again and again... and again. Over time you go from "oh God, I hope she's alright" to "ok, well I hope she will do well? I wonder what sickness/virus/incident she will be in next chapter". Tldr; you go from feeling worried to just feeling void and slightly annoyed. |
![]() ![]() ![]() What's the problem? just wish her body back to a perfect state with the dragon balls. Now, usually that would be considered a selfish request but you could easily do something good by wishing for everyone incapable of having children to have their issues fixed/healed. |
![]() ![]() that was a good first chapter i wonder how gohans experences will deffer from what they were in the dbz timline we all know. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Your story had such a grate impact. Character development, story-line and even family matters are perfect. You realy are a splendid author and I can't wait to read more of your stories! Thank you |