Your idea is exellent, and I'm curious to see how your going to do this. One piece of advice though. Dont speed it up too much and make sure to star another paragraph once a different character talks. Other than that, great job!

It was good,

hello your first chapter is tremendous. Sorry if i miss spell anything in this reveiw my keyboard is broken. Not to seem rude, but when one person talks then you go to make another talk you are suppose to start another paragraph. Beside that it was fanomanel!

Nice one! Post more!

Cool you got this in a bag. You're doing fine.

i am but a concerned review who thinks that your story has alot of potential ive been looking for a story were it is just that harry has the sharingan and isnt a crossover mostly (like his parents being uchihas) or that he was the creator of it more like he was a descendent and it was a trait in the potter bloodline (purebloodsarroganceuchiha pricks[ unless you a malfoy then your a son of a female inuzaka])that skips a certain number of generations or had all but died out without new blood being introduced so that when lilly came into play the bloodline activated fullforce in harry

patrick scanlon

This has great potential. I think Harry with the Sharingan in the Harry Potter world only is an excellent idea.

solid start I'd like to see more

for future reference you are supposed to start a new paragraph every the speaker changes

Wrong:

"good evening Albus." She said. “Where is the boy?” “Hagrid is bringing him here.” Dumbledore replied."

Right:

"good evening Albus." She said. “Where is the boy?”

“Hagrid is bringing him here.” Dumbledore replied.

other than that and a few grammar/punctuation issues a solid first chp

Interesting.

update soon? any naruto characters in this story?

i say it's an ok way to start a good story. please update again soon

great story!

this is good please update soon

i like a lot of these stories

Please update soon this is a good story sofar on this line