|Reviews for Pure Mornings|
| unknown reader chapter 10 . 3/23
WHAT THE FRIKIN' FUCK
Sorry the bad words
| Jesus Christ chapter 1 . 11/30/2013
Now usually I would not stop interrupt my day to review shit stories like this, but this is just so inexplicably horrid I just have to say something. First off, correct punctuation; use it
God I don't actually know where to begin. I mean, it really disgusts me and honestly amazes me, that human being can write such a piece of shit and actually think it's worthy of being typed up and put out on the Internet.
Let's start off with a few key problems with this fic. First off, I don't know what the fuck you're trying to say. I literally do not understand what it is you were trying to tell me. A simple sentence has to be some weird ass Shakespearean shit and I understand Shakespeare more than I understand a single sentence of the story in context or out. There literally is not a single area of the English language you have not managed to completely butcher.
Punctuation, the motherfucking 'H' in where, sentence fragments, quotations, tenses; need I go on? Oh yes, and question marks!
Next, you completely destroyed the characters. I don't know if I've ever read a more out of character fanfic, other than My Immortal, A.k.a. the single shittiest fanfiction ever written.
Now I understand some kinks that you might find in fanfiction, and I admit that I may have a few of them, but mpreg is not on that list.
I feel like I just can't convey in words how truly up horribly awful this piece of shit you call a story is so I'm to leave this link here. I think it accurately summarizes your crimes.
| Myra the Dovahkiin chapter 21 . 8/3/2013
great story. keep writing. update soon. I can't wait to read more! This is getting interesting.
| JaneMartin906 chapter 5 . 10/30/2010
I normally do not even bother reading reviews for shit stories like this, and read the whole thing because you'll learn a little about anatomy. I can forgive your obvious lack of basic grammar knowledge, and for now I'll overlook you completely raping these classic characters and turning them into your little emo, gay, whining, cringing, skinny-jeans wearing, freakish fantasy pets to play with, but this has gone way too far for me to overlook.
Now listen closely:
MALES CANNOT GET PREGNANT.
There is no biological way for this to happen. The male anatomy cannot "magically" create an egg with no ovary, uterus, fallopian tube, or estrogen. You need an ovary to create an egg. And even if this happened, there needs to be a way for the sperm to enter the uterus and fuse with the egg. That's what a vagina is for. You can't have a uterus and a penis. When this abomination is born, how exactly will it come out? He doesn't have a cervix that will dilate, no birth canal, no vagina, no way, no how, not going to happen, unless it comes out the colon, but the uterus does not, can not, and should not connect with the colon without serious health complications, or if it comes out the penis, which will completely destroy that forever. Since male/male sex is conducted in the rectum anyway, there's no way for the sperm to enter the uterus, since the rectum connects with the digestive system and not the reproductive system. This entire idea is ridiculous, stupid, and wrong on every level of decency.
Also, to even dare and use your little bastardized fantasy land of forced wangst and have it inspired by a heartbreaking tragedy is inexcusable. Do you even know the struggles that Thomas and Nancy Beatie had with infertility before he decided to carry a child himself? The only way he was able to do that was because he's a transsexual, and they have enough problems in society without being used as fodder for pathetic bullshit "science" like the steaming pile you've concocted.
| At the writer's block chapter 1 . 10/30/2010
Okay, I wasn't going to review anything, I was going to blissfully soldier on through this fic, regardless of your obvious lack of knowledge of grammar or proper word usage. I wasn't going to say anything, honest. BUT.
"'Look, I'm sorry I took advantage of you, Bruce.' Crane said"
NO. Bruce took advantage of him, and when Crane apologized, you all but said that the victim was at fault (yes, victim. Crane never gave verbal consent at the end of chapter three.)
This combined with that comment about the pregnant man has pushed me to my limit. The transphobia you are implying here is saddening, along with the fact that you think Mad Magazine is a credible source.
Again, I didn't want to leave a negative review, but I could only make it to chapter five before I became to upset to say anything. Yes, upset. The implications of victim blaming and transphobia have upset me more than angered me.
I hope you grow as a writer, because I would hate to see people buying into this kind of malarkey.
| JackChrist chapter 3 . 10/20/2010
I don't usually leave a review if I dislike a story - I usually try to say something in the way of advising the author rather than insulting them – but I couldn’t let this go unsaid. Especially after reading so many ‘good’ reviews for it. There’s no good points about this story, you have the characters mannerisms all wrong. I could only read as far as chapter three before feeling completely disgusted with myself for even reading past the first paragraph (if you could even call it that).
You cannot seriously call this a Batman fanfic? Did it never occur to you that you might want to get to know the characters, and how they actually act, before you start to write about them? Believe me I’m not against slash when it’s done properly. This isn’t.
Furthermore, there’s so many grammatical errors and spelling mistakes. What you were trying to get across became highly confusing, not only that but it lacks continuity which made it even more difficult to follow.
My constructive criticism? Get to know the characters before you completely butcher their personalities in such a way that, had they not got the same names, they’d be unrecognisable. That and you really need to proof read what you’ve written, and if you already check through what you’ve written then you should check again. I honestly think this is an insult to a fandom, a genre and a group of characters that I love so dearly.
| newbluemoon chapter 21 . 2/17/2010
Okay...what the hell? No seriously. I am trying very hard right now to not flame this because I know how much flame suck. As an author, I do not generally write negative critism about work because it's not fun to recieve but you have no idea how hard I'm struggling to find something possitive to say about this. The only thing I can come up with is that the humour is good on occasion, and I'm not even sure if it's done on purpose.
The disclaimer said "A bit OOC". Are you kidding me? My stories can get a bit ooc at times, but you freaking butchered and anally raped these characters worse than a Mary Sue ficcer. I don't like mpreg at all, but that isn't the issue- that's a difference in taste so whatever. But these characters ARE NOT Bruce, Joker, Crane et al. They're not. You've used their images and wrote a whole bunch of OCs devoid of any true characteristic or trait belonging to them. I feel awful for having read this. I've been reading about and studying these characters since I was 6 and just to have you come along and destroy them like this is a terrible, terrible thing to witness. I've never seen a story so ooc outside of Joker/OC/Bruce/OC etc. Did you actually consider their characerisations AT ALL? Because you seriously need to if you want to improve.
I'm sorry but this is essentially a Sue fic that uses canon names. There is nothing even conceivabley true to canon here.
And it's not just the characterisation either, there are so many errors within the text. You have messed up your own continuity, you randomly change pov, randomly change tense, there are loads of spelling errors and punctuation errors and grammatical errors etc etc. I seriously could go on. I cannot compute why you didn't think it necessary to get a beta. Did you even proof read this?
God, I'm desperately trying to think of a plus side because I don't want to leave just a negative comment, but outside a good one-liner every so often, there's no saving grace. You've destroyed these characters with this fic. I can only hope you will/have improve(d).
I know this review is going to suck to read, but you have to take into account the reason I'm so disgusted- I've spent way too much time on these guys to see this kind of treatment and take it lightly. I can take some ooc-ness, some fluff, some h/c etc, but this just takes the absolute p*ss. I don't even...
| Sheregal chapter 21 . 9/21/2009
Love it. love the humor. ya slay me
| Ididntdoit07 chapter 21 . 6/24/2009
Nice A/N I suppose that was to me, but I am glad you added some more Batsy/Joker, especially hot sex. P
And one more thing, the last few paragraphs were a little confusing. When a new person talks you separate it to another line. I might have a lot of critique, but I'm the nicest person ever. Ha
| Miz. Jynx chapter 21 . 6/23/2009
Now how will they pull this one off! 8) Lillian is so cute, just chiming in like that. I couldn't help but laugh when Jokesty got all self conscious. But I just realized, Riddles dreamt of things that really did occur, so does that mean that they didn't happen in your fic or had Riddles somehow managed to see things from the past? I thought it was a coincidence but I'm not too sure. Looking forward to the next chapter!
As an after thought, Joker and hospitals never did mix, did they? O.o' I wonder if he'll put on a nurses outfit again! X3
| Ididntdoit07 chapter 20 . 6/23/2009
Hmm... I really liked this story from the beginning but switching POV's is really confusing and if you want to have a POV you should stick to one instead of everyone, and instead write in the 3rd person, just a note to help me and other readers as I suspect they may have the same issue as well.
Its still a good story but I would like a little more Bruce/Jack cause, well, they are the focus of the story. Just giving little notes, because I dont want to give up on this story, I want to see how it ends and the babies!
| Miz. Jynx chapter 19 . 6/22/2009
O.O This chapter is descibed in that one litte emocon.(for lack of better term).
"Ohh, white boy, play that funky music all right." Edward said, as dirty as he could, as Crane let out a strangled moan.
I couldn't BREATH I was laughing so hard! XD
| Miz. Jynx chapter 20 . 6/22/2009
Yay! This chapter made me squeal! XD Towards the end you made Johnny seem so creepy, and with that song, yikes! O~O I almost forgot that he used to be a cold hearted killer(sorta) His actions made him look more like a sadist than a blood thirsty psycho. lol. Speaking of the Joker, he wasn't in this chappy. :( My hopes went up when I saw this in my mail, got shot down when I realized Joker wasn't in it, and shot back up when I read the last POV. X3 lawl. Looking forward to the next chapter!
| SlytherinQueen020 chapter 5 . 6/8/2009
It's so wrong but I love this story!
| SlytherinQueen020 chapter 2 . 6/8/2009
I hope your happy. Batman is ruined for me now!