|Reviews for My Prince Charming|
| Ducks-Go-Aflack chapter 8 . 7/7/2010
This was a great story!
Three things I thought you did well:
1- You preserved the original lightness of tone from the anime.
2- You wrote the romance in a believable and satisfactory way.
3- Both main characters (Treize, Lillia) contributed to moving the plot along as well as developing with and independent of the other main character.
Three thing I thought could be better:
1- the plot was somewhat simplistic.
2- The support characters weren't acting realistically (sending Lillian off to find Treize all by herself, for example).
3- Silly villains. During the dogfight with the enemy pilot, I expected someone to say, "Can't let you do that, Star Fox!" If you have no idea what I'm talking about, sorry. It just seemed like the banter during that fight was overly-camp, with a decidedly Star Fox influence.
However those three things to improve *pale* in comparison to the biggest flaw of this fic: THERE IS NO SEQUEL!
There, I said it. The biggest thing wrong with this story is that is over. Now I have nothing to read- and it's all your fault!
Seriously though, this is a really good story. Great job, and keep writing awesome stories like this one! I hope you write another Allison/Lillia story soon!
| IGAF-kun chapter 8 . 7/2/2010
Nice work. Keep it up.
| Holmes's Apprentice chapter 1 . 9/21/2009
treize and lillia forever! best love team ever! well, except for will and allison
| jayb chapter 8 . 7/27/2009
This makes an excellent story arc, I like it. Good work with it all.
| Ltscw chapter 8 . 7/24/2009
Bravo! They made it without killing each other lol. Very well done, really touching, and a 10 in my book. Congrats on another story in the record books.
| jayb chapter 6 . 5/14/2009
I like it, and our boy finally was able to say what he wanted. I'm looking forward to the next chapter. What was the fighter Treize and Lillia flew in?
| Ltscw chapter 5 . 3/29/2009
Very nicely done once again. Truely intense as the two once again can't seem to stay out of trouble. When doesn't trouble ever follow them?
| jayb chapter 4 . 3/6/2009
I found this by accident and am enjoying it. Allison and Lillia is one of my favorite series, besides Zero no Tsukaima, and you are doing it justice. Keep up the good work.
| Falsetta-Arias chapter 1 . 3/5/2009
Yo! I am Scarlette from your forum, and I have come to review your story! :D
Congradulation on being the first one writing for this category! It seems that very little people like this show...probably because the anime totally butchered the books.
Anyways, good job on the first chapter. If I may I would like to point out some things for you to work on.
Your prose needs a little smoothing. Reading this is a little monotoneous. Try to change up your vocabulary or add in some literary devices.
And Lillia seems a little OOC. She's just not that giggly...
Amd btw, Travis and Allison are 35 during Lillia and Treize.
| zignaoozm chapter 3 . 2/14/2009
*waits patiently for more*
Good stuff. :)
| Ltscw chapter 2 . 2/8/2009
Excellent once again as always. But as is true Lillia and Treize have gotten themselves once again into another predicament. Figures knowing those two lol.
| Ltscw chapter 1 . 2/3/2009
Very good. The characters felt just like they were in the anime. Very well done.
PS: First to comment!