|Reviews for Shadow|
| Senshi-of-Love chapter 8 . 6/30/2012
That's cool, I hope you're able to update soon. Great story, hope college is going well! ;D
| An Ocean Under A Thousand Suns chapter 1 . 5/9/2010
good job glad you updated! the only thing i would have to say is the band thingies i mean i dont think that many people would get em it would feel too much like jews in nazi germany lol i mean i get its a school and all and they would probly encourage the students to get them and to live peacefuly but still wouldnt be no way id get one lol ohh and bring on wolverine lol anyways good job pdate sooooonnnn
| Anon chapter 7 . 5/7/2010
It's been so long I had to reread the whole story! Good chapter. Cliffhangers need quick updates though. Need them! :)
| bip95 chapter 1 . 1/6/2010
wow this is really great! when i was reading I thought that the voice in megs mind was xavier, or wutever his name was but then i realised he died! i miss him :( keep up the good wor tho can't wait to read more!
| Siladhiel Lithvirax chapter 6 . 6/22/2009
awesome story love it lots and please keep going this is my favorite story concerning the mutant reistration act. keep writing youre doing really well!
| Muse chapter 6 . 6/17/2009
I love this story too. Please post the next chapter.
| L1NAE chapter 6 . 5/26/2009
Since I already sent a review, I decided to try a loophole.
Hopefully it works.
I keep getting emails for Ch7 but Ch7 doesn't exist :\
Please update soon!
| EastAngels2009 chapter 6 . 5/19/2009
this is great. please update soon.
I want "Incident"
| An Ocean Under A Thousand Suns chapter 6 . 5/17/2009
hope you update soon and that she meets wolverine soon too
| Sunshine Samich chapter 6 . 5/15/2009
Okay, so now I've gotten to the last chapter and I want mo'. Dx
So you should update sometime soon. P
| Nyx chapter 6 . 5/7/2009
Oh your offer wants me to go sign up! Anyways, wonderful story. Best OCs I've seen in awhile, and the way you incorporate the events of X3 is so well done! Please continue!
| Mcginnis567 chapter 6 . 5/6/2009
This is really good, can't wait to see more of it.
| ChetCheerio chapter 6 . 5/6/2009
I just love love love love love this story! Woot! Can't wait for the next one!
p.s. - when is Logan going to come in?
| Clumsical chapter 6 . 5/6/2009
Coolio story. I like how you are describing everything.
Continue writing and all that jazz.
| Sunshine Samich chapter 1 . 5/6/2009
As much as I don't like X3, it is refreshing to read a good post-Last Stand fic once in a while, and this satisfies.
However, there were just a few grammatical errors I'd like to point out if I may;
"They didn’t know I could quite possibly be the best ninja/spy ever." - Unless it's in the name of something, try never to use backslashes (or forwards ones) in a story.
"They didn’t know that with a simple bit of concentration, I could disappear before your eyes." - You have two conflicting pronouns, 'they' and 'your'. You can either say, "/You/ wouldn't know that with a simple bit of concentration, I could disappear before your eyes," or, "They didn’t know that with a simple bit of concentration, I could disappear before /their/ eyes."
"I could turn myself invisible and you would never be able to find me unless I wanted you to." - In formal or story writing, it's best to use individual pronouns instead of personal. It stays consistent with the tense that way.
"But not only could I become invisible; when in that state, nobody could hear a single sound I might make." - These two sentences can be combined into, "But not only could I become invisible/;/ When in that state, nobody could hear a single sound I might make.
"First they took down basic information like your name, age, DOB, address, phone number, social security number, etc." - Try never to use abbreviations that aren't the name of something, and "etc" is evil! Dx It is very informal, even in a story form.
"If it was a soft name, they didn’t take me seriously. If it was a rough name, they either feared me, or thought of me as beneath them because I was a mutant." - Tense disagreements. Consider rewriting to, "If it was a soft name, they /wouldn't/ take me seriously. If it was a rough name, /they'd/ either /fear/ me or /think/ of me as beneath them because I was a mutant."
“Everything about my features is average." - Subject/verb disagreement. Reverse to, “Everything about my features are average."
"Before my ability revealed itself, I’d had light blue eyes..." - Tense disagreement; should be, "Before my ability revealed itself, I had light blue eyes..."
"When I’m invisible, not only can nobody see me, nobody can hear me, and nobody has yet to feel as if something is there." Dictionaries will say that "nobody" and "no one" are interchangeable, but just for future records, "nobody" is informal, but does refer to a group of people, and "no one" is formal, and refers to "not one individual".
"Nobody has felt that with me." - Here, "no one" would be best.
"The only way anyone has ever been able to find me is by my standing completely still while they ran into me.” Just a little awkward and a few improper tenses. Consider changing to, "The only way anyone has ever been able to find me is /if/ /I/ /stand/ completely still while they /run/ into me.”
"Then, he talked." - "Talked" is informal and is incorrect here. Try, "Then, he /spoke/."
"I just wanted to shout at them “I am a person you know!” But I stayed silent, listening to their exchange." The flow of this sentence (because it can be one) looks more like, "I just wanted to shout at them, “I am a person you know!”, nut I stayed silent, listening to their exchange."
"I think a bit more time and control would be to hers and our benefit.” Really awkward. I'm not sure how to change it, but you may want to consider changing it. P
"I made a mental not of it..." - I'm sure you can guess. "I made a mental /note/ of it..."
"We’d paused now, continuing our silent conversation just before the door with the guard beyond it." - Tense disagreement. "/We/ paused now, continuing our silent conversation just before the door with the guard beyond it."
"I’d watched him close the clip, but I couldn’t even figure out how it would open again." Tense disagreement. "/I/ watched him close the clip, but I couldn’t even figure out how it would open again."
Peaze don't think me as pretentious, I just like when people spell check mine, so I try to return the favor. xP
When I get some more time, I'm going to finish reading it. )
Thanks and love, Sunshine Samich.