|Reviews for First Time|
| Guest chapter 1 . 2/25
argh come on. Huge block of letters- ran away sry
| IslandWoman221 chapter 1 . 7/13/2011
Loved the content, bb! So very true to life! *knowing snort, laugh* So glad you bravely posted, Love. I'd be happy to help with the formatting and add a tiny bit of beta magic. It's really quite nice and deserves to shine for what it is! *smooches*
| S.ocd.H chapter 3 . 8/16/2010
I really rather liked this story. It has a certian appeal, and it shows that even the perfect couple don't get everything right the first time.
| Lady Gwynedd chapter 1 . 7/25/2010
Absolutely loved it!
For me the first time felt physically more like a pap smear than anything else. Emotionally, it was very lovely and wonderful but physically I wondered what all the fuss was about.
Off to read more of your work.
| HeavenlyAngel34 chapter 3 . 6/26/2010
| CrysWimmer chapter 3 . 1/30/2010
I enjoyed your portrail of Edward most in this story. I happen to agree with your analysis of chapter one that the first time was not likely to be perfect given that they both were first-timers. You weren't the least bit confusing in this chapter, and the grammar was fine for what it was. Stephenie Meyer isn't known for complete sentences and exact form, but the flow is always good. You achieved the same thing here. The only flaw I saw was the expletive - I just can't see proper Edward Cullen using profanity. But then, I'm a bit of a purist to "voice" and maintaining character integrity. Out of canon stories make me insane. You stayed beautifully within canon... but you didn't mention biting the pillows... several times. If you take out that last paragraph, you could add a fourth chapter, you know. Hey... a girl can hope!
| Jennifer chapter 3 . 12/15/2009
I read all three of your Twilight stories (chapters) and I found that the 3rd was the best of all. Don't stop writing. You seem to be in tune with Edward POV and it read very realisitcally. I also enjoyed that it wasn't perfect the first time. I know mine was nowhere near perfect - not for many more times after that - although I didn't want to wait that long for B & E.
I enjoyed Edward's distractions and then pulling himself back to the moment and Bella's needs before his own.
Great job on this. Looking forward to more!
| ThatGirlWhoPlaysCoD chapter 2 . 12/2/2009
im sorry if you take this the wrong way, but this story is hilarious. please continue!
| Kristen chapter 3 . 8/25/2009
I thought that this little story was Absolutely Great! Not smutty or degrading like some of the others out there. Just what Breaking Dawn was missing to make it complete.
| elphabacy35 chapter 3 . 5/18/2009
This was a great little story. I would actually like to have read more. You may want to consider doing a few more chapters, covering the rest of their honeymoon. You have nothing to be embarrassed about! I found the sex stuff very tasteful. I think this was my favorite line :
"I should certainly die of shame for not meeting her needs and then forcing her to talk about it. Focus Edward!"
| RowanMoon chapter 3 . 5/17/2009
THAT. WAS. AMAZING.
Your EPOV was beyond perfect. His trepidation and need to do right by her was so in character. Reining himself in, letting himself go, always concentrating. I really really liked how you wrote this.
Fabulous job. applause
| RowanMoon chapter 2 . 5/17/2009
Excellent. I love Bella's painful shyness and her inability to even say "orgasm" in her head. So cute. So very in character if you stick with SM's version of Bella who was "mortified" and embarrassed very easily.
| RowanMoon chapter 1 . 5/17/2009
I was so excited when you told me you wrote some fics over here!
I really liked this. I like your balls in going with the honest, awkward first time between two scared virgins.
You really should consider posting this on Twilighted! Awesome job...off to read chapter 2! I hope Bella and Edward get some more...practice. He!
| Shell7609 chapter 3 . 3/16/2009
I'm new to the world of twilight fanfic, but I absolutely love how you wrote the wedding night. Like you, I'm an 'older' reader of the series, and would have enjoyed more detail in the description of their first time.
| Tasia chapter 1 . 3/8/2009
Yeah I understand...I won't write one; too embarrassing!
It was good tho
I thought ur A.N.'s were funni
'Blushing here'I wld prbly put tht too!