devilshalo98 chapter 1 . 11/20/2010
'You only had *bitches*. So you got whips and chains.'

'Go conquer the bitches.'

Best. Lines. Ever.
reve2weaver chapter 1 . 9/18/2010
Yes, we of twilight FanFic love what we hate to love, hatefully, lovingly. Who else but Edward to bear the burden of ridiculous expectations so we can ignore the ones we place on our own shoulders.

What about Geekward? Shy, but he has zero sexual inhibitions. Socially awkward and isolated despite his loyal friends, successful business, excellent academics and fantastic wealth. His life is meaningless until he has sex. If chronic masturbating to internet porn could really offer computer nerds such fantastic skill sets, we'd be overrun with Pyrrhic Geekwards humping us joyfully and shamelessly on the hood of the bat mobile at comic con.
Phantom Of FFN chapter 1 . 9/18/2010
Amen to that, sister! Hilarious!
Lena chapter 1 . 7/28/2010
Incredibly funny, and more surprisingly, truthful :o
aniseed flower chapter 1 . 6/29/2010
Lmao! I noticed quite a few favourites in there..hehe.
Mallory Marvel chapter 1 . 5/19/2010
Ah, you're hilarious. I can already predict that your stories will be crazy. I'll go read them.
sorrowfloats44 chapter 1 . 4/17/2010
I was sitting here this morning having no fics to read, realizing the fic-universe is empty without your crazed whackiness, so I decided to read anything by you, and I found this... you complete me! Laughed til my eyes leaked. Love it. Miss your writing :(
mugglemom08 chapter 1 . 4/7/2010
Antagonistic protagonist chapter 1 . 4/3/2010
My favorite is the Domward one. Laughed my ass off reading this. My brother had to come in here and tell me to shut up bcuz he was watching tv. You are some character. What would Lord Voldemort do? LOL! Fucking genius!
Irene Lavigne chapter 1 . 3/28/2010

i like its.
goldenhair chapter 1 . 2/24/2010
Oh, my cheeks are hurting. Seriously, this is not an hyperbole, they're really hurting right now.

This was so, so very true.

I loved this line: "She obsesses about how her soulmate's feelings but never about her soulmate's ass." Ah... Gotta love Gwenth. (why "Gwenth", btw?)


You should add Complicatedward to the list. He can't speak to Bella or commit to her or whatever but not because he's an asshole! No... He has ISSUES. His mother abandonned him. His parents died because he was driving recklessely. Or because he was stuck in a fire and they wanted to save him. His sister stole his favorite toy when he was 6 and he never got over it.

BIG issues. Angsty-I'm-a-monsterward. Seriously. Don't forget about him, he's everywhere.
mgs1992 chapter 1 . 1/16/2010
Haha, this is epic. I love it.

eli-dunbigboot chapter 1 . 1/10/2010
So I guess I should give up reading now eh? I would save myself hours, days, weeks, months...
dragonflyidt chapter 1 . 12/27/2009
You know, this could totally be used as a tutorial for people wanting to write a fic. It's like the skeleton of every Whateverward fic out there.

It's like those dry soup packages, add water "et voila", you've got food. Pick a Ward, personalize by adding your own details, and you've got yourself a story. :D
SweetDulcinea chapter 1 . 12/20/2009
Healingward is 10 percent my favorite part, specifically the 2nd half.

Thanks for all the LOLz )
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