Reviews for Fall of Innocence
Runecutter chapter 3 . 5/15
The experiences of "Lind" and "Joe Black" seem to contradict each other. Harry is told apparation needs a license just like in Britain, yet Sieglinde apparated into the country and was not pursued for it. Both use superficial camouflage and shallowly prepared "alibi identities" yet only Harry gets catched and threatened upon it, while his reason to stay in America seems from the outset the less suspicious one? Really?

It would really seem that without the "warning" from Scrimgeours office the Americans of Mr alexander would never have caught on to Harry and his relatively harsh treatment was only due to them being forewarned and able to scrutinize the three travellers all the more.
HoosierCullen chapter 3 . 2/2/2013
Okay I have read both stories and by your discription you are of a mind to scrap this series of stories. I think that would be a waste of a great story. You have a great start to a second part of a brilliant story in Key. This starts out very well and has some potential to be just as interesting as Key was. You have Harry attending Salem Academy, his relationship growing with Tonks, Remus and his attempt to cage the wolf within, The world in England and how it is progressing, life at Hogwarts without Harry, and just things Harry is learning in America. I would hate to see someone with a good story give it up and think you should reconsider scraping this story and its following sequels. I love it and hope you come back to it.
AlGiardino chapter 3 . 1/29/2011
Awesome story. Just finished all the stories in this universe. Come on, give us a chapter. Hiatus is lame. This story is to good to not keep going.
gaschalk chapter 3 . 2/2/2010
Will you be continuing this story? It is good and I am wondering what will happen when Lind and Remus meet? I know that this story is in Hiatus at the moment but it has been close to at year and I am hoping you will continue it.

Stan
ObsessedWithHPFanFic chapter 3 . 6/23/2009
Good story so far. I know it takes setup time to get the new story established and look forward to your continued updates. Thanks for sharing!
jesterod chapter 2 . 6/9/2009
ive just read key and the first chapter of fall and i saw that your thinking about scraping it or rewriting it im loving it so far tho i thought there would be more of a relation ship in the harry/tonks aspect but the way its going its alot more believable than most that are out there

well iather way i like the stuff ive read of yours so far and i wish you luck on others hope your muse stays with you finicky things that they are
iamnuff chapter 3 . 4/3/2009
very finished a key/fall binge and im craving more at 2;00 in the morning
TxA-GunFighter chapter 3 . 3/17/2009
Good chapter.

gunny
SoulGriever13 chapter 3 . 3/8/2009
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Harry had faced a number of intimidating characters, but this man, old and wrinkled and frail looking, exuded authority and threat like no one else he'd met. It was like staring down a trolley.

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you should probably use something other than 'trolley' here. I realize you likely mean a tram or trolleybus, but the first, instinctive reaction had me thinking about the other, more immediately obvious meanings. I don't know about you, but I find the notion of a shopping cart, hand-truck, or gurney as being something threatening laughable at best.

Also, you lose credibility points for the 'threat like no one else he'd met' part. At this point in time, Harry's already faced down various mythical beasties, seen Dumbledore and Voldemort in full fury, had to deal with fighting/escaping the latter and his lackeys, and numerous other bits and pieces that, quite frankly, all rank a lot higher than a bureaucrat. I'm not saying the man can't have a presence about him, but the way you've described it is just so unlikely as to be ridiculous given the players involved.

Still, other than these two bits, I do like the story (even if Draco actually having a spine and being competent seem a bit far-fetched).
back2front chapter 3 . 3/2/2009
Please update sonn i love this story! i read the last one in one go and am eagerly waiting the next chapter! so few decent HP/NT stories that arnt basically porn, this is shaping up to be a real classic! great work!
LoireLoa chapter 3 . 3/1/2009
This is interesting. And a little frustrating for Harry. Dumbledore, it seems, has decided that since he "defeated" Grindewauld, he doesn't need armed forces. Or perhaps, is the reasoning behind the lack of active duty officers a result of the Unbreakable Vow he made to Tom. Dumbles was appointed to the Wizengamot, and anything that would give the Ministry or the public a means to fight back against Tommy Boy may have been seen as an act of aggression agaist him. Hmm... Dumbles should have just killed Gellert. Yeah, he loved him, but sometimes the people you love warp into a bit of nastiness that need to be taken down. But, as they say, Love is blind...
Sword'sfunPen'sbetter8P chapter 3 . 2/25/2009
cool
Nights Silhouette chapter 3 . 2/25/2009
A good story to date, keep it up.
Tabea chapter 3 . 2/23/2009
I like your story very much, please continue soon :)
Stunna21 chapter 3 . 2/21/2009
good story so far and update soon this is getting very interesting so keep writing and can't wait for more.
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