Reviews for Golden Moon
Monroe5 chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
First thank-you for responding to my review. I'm so glas that we were on the same page about Bella and the knife. I just wanted to let you know that I truly love your writing. Though Jasper was a favorite of my from the begining you have totally made me love him more. It makes my day to find an email update. I can't wait for what comes next. A whole day together...the possibilies! I will just let you know as far as I'm concerned I am ready for something to happen between them. I'm not saying anything out of charater but I think they both have gotten to the point where something has to give. I would love Jasper to be the one saying or doing something. Bella always was the forward one with Edward when it came to anything like that. Keep up the amazing work. I'll be waiting for the next chapter, hopefully a nice long one.
girlygirl chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
i am so looking forward to know what is going to happen in seattle.

by the way i really like your story. please update as soon as possible.
sakari-x chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
I am truly loving this story, Jasper/Bella stories are definitely my favorite. You write very well, the pacing is just right (especially if this will be a long story *hope*hope*). The characters are very believable, as are their emotions. Keep up the good work and I am really looking forward to future chapters!
Chloe.963 chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
why? i loved reading this. dont stop writing. please write more. :D
Jeanita chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
I really can't wait for Saturday to come! I hope you post the new chapter soon. This is really good! Though, I know I probably should expect something big and bad in the future.
Rena the Strange chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
yay, I really liked this chapter.*pats on the back* For a first FF your doing amazing. And I have my theories for what their going to do on Saturday evening, but I won't voice them.

DreamAngel9686 chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
Once again, I can't wait to read more Jasper is so wonderful!
Chloe.963 chapter 11 . 3/17/2009
great chapter. chapter 11 is best so far.
MizzKat chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
I like. It has be getting ready for the next day. I'm excited.
Love Lizzie chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
good story and write more ok and ill be waiting for the next chapter
dragonett3 chapter 21 . 3/17/2009

Your writing is so amazing!

Im as caught up with this as i was with twilight!
Calliope Jones chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
Oh yes. Perfect.

I STILL love this line- “I know. But there are questions that should never be asked, things that should only be revealed if you desire to do so.”
Tempting Tangle chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
I loved this chapter obviously lol

and I burst out laughing at even the mention of the supermarket haha chick peas XD

Lizbit chapter 21 . 3/17/2009

I wouldn't want to give you the impression that I'm not really, REALLY enjoying your story. I am. A little too much, in all honesty. I really should be focussing on my last two chapters...

It's true I may not agree with every decision or direction you have made, but it's YOUR story. This is your world, and who the hell am I to dictate to you what's right and wrong? I totally get that, so I hope you don't feel that my personal preferances are the only right. That's crap. Again, just letting you in on the quagmyre that is my brain.

Bella falls in love with Jasper, and are meant to be together, eh? Well, alright if you say it's to be. I can play along, and not criticise. Really, I can!

Except for typos. I'm calling you on those, but I'm glad you approve and are not insulted. :) I'd expect the same on my story, completely.

Alright. Onto your story...

Careful in the third paragraph - every sentence starts with 'I'.

"Charlie finally made his way upstairs and I was able to get ready for bed and turn off the light for my nightly conversation with Jasper." - Don't know if you did it intentionally, but you've created a parallel for Edward and Bela. Just as Edward used to sneak into her room to watch her sleep, Jasper spends his nights with her on the phone. Good. Like it.

"This was from somewhere i have never traveled, gladly beyond by e.e. cummings. " - 'I' needs a capital, as does E.E. Cummings.

This love-poem idea I can see going different ways. Jasper might be inclined to chose a poem that makes him think of her, she to love it, but upon Mike hearing it, think its about him, and, again, my whole 'Bella being bitten in the ass' theory. Will have to wait and see.

“The Cullens care about you.” I said, quietly. - Comma needed here after 'you', not period.

"Like how you became a vampire? I had already breached this unwritten etiquette by asking the forbidden question. I would not do it again. He would tell me when he was ready." - Am trying to remember back. I thought she KNEW how to become a vampire. Why would she need to ask again?

Really liked this chapter. Jasper is a very interesting character, and I'm really enjoying how you're "disecting" him, for lack of a better word.

Look forward to the next one. Don't be scared to ask for help, running ideas past me if you get writer's block again.

Liz :)
JaspersBella chapter 21 . 3/17/2009
But there are questions that should never be asked, things that should only be revealed if you desire to do so.” This is my favorite line, there's just something about it. Another great chapter written. I am SO enjoying this and can't wait to read more.
5,573 | « Prev Page 1 .. 342 349 350 351 352 353 354 355 362 .. Last Next »