Reviews for Desert
Vampyria1836 chapter 1 . 7/13/2010
I really like the story. Interesting idea you've got here.

One thing though. You really should put something in to indicate change in perspective, some sort of break. Other than that, it's a great story. Can't wait for next chapter :)
NeverEverFaceTheDark chapter 1 . 6/3/2009
Original idea, Eclair and Lumiere seem IC enough for an AU, though i'm a bit dissapointed that Eclipse and Dvergr don't seem to resemble the characters in Kiddy Grade personality and relationship-wise (Eclipse towards Eclair, and Dvergr towards Alv, as i think that the original Dvergr wouldn't have reacted so lightly to Alv's death) much at all...But very well written though, fastpaced and with a humorous tone to it. I'd love to read more!
hanjuuluver chapter 1 . 2/28/2009
Twas a little difficult to get the flow of the story because you kept changing perspectives, and it all read a bit like a bad western movie, but you have an interesting idea. I haven't seen much AU for Kiddy Grade, and I think it's an interesting chance to see the posibilities play out.

Working in some basic background to base this story on (job descriptions, modivations, etc) will definatly improve the read, but I am glad you didn't try putting any of that in the first chapter-builds more suspence and mystery this way.

Also have to point and squeek that you used my state in here! yay for New Mexico, the hardly recognised state!

Also, can't say I'll be of much use, but since I put out the ideas of ways to improve, feel free to bounce ideas off me or ask questions about what I was saying if it didn't make any sense.
Faded Writer chapter 1 . 2/24/2009
Yay, yet another Eclair/Lumiere fic popping up, but an AU one, which I am loving now by the way. You've got a good story so far. The idea of Eclair as a criminal and your portrayal of her, almost similiar to the anime, is a real nice combanation. I kinda like the idea of Eclair taking Lumiere as a hostage, and Lumiere taking another life for Eclair's sake and possibly siding with her.

I loved Eclair's soothing words and gratitude for Lumiere, especially the hair brushing and all (Eclair is so sweet), really I hope you have more bonding/intimate scenes between the two of them in the future.

I really can't wait to see chapter 2, and hopefully beyond that!

~ Faded Writer