|Reviews for Withered Butterfly|
| Phantasmal Abduction chapter 5 . 9/10/2013
Hah, it's bedtime and I'm totally tempted just to flag sleep and read this right through... Even though I need to be up obscenely early tomorrow.
Excellent story so far and hopefully I'll have time to read more tomorrow :)
| AbaraiArekushisu chapter 21 . 5/22/2012
Omg I hv been waiting so long for this story. It is my absolute favorite Inuyasha fanfic. Strangely enough, that same song was playing over and over in my head the whole time I was reading...huh. Anyway, great chapter, I can't wait for the next one!
| AM78 chapter 3 . 5/18/2012
Once again this had some great writing, though there was one typo. The word "threat" where it should have been "treat". I really like how vivid and detailed the flashbacks are. Clearly you've put a lot of thought into them.
However, I gotta say the whole "Sango must be alone because she's a warrior woman" theme is getting state. Not only is it clearly false, and Sango should realize it, but it's getting too repetitive, being brought up time and time again in each chapter. I think I get it by now.
Still this was another good chapter and I'm looking forward to more.
| ardy1 chapter 21 . 5/18/2012
The story is interesting as a whole, and it kept me reading through all 21 chapters to date. That's probably the best compliment I can give it.
I wish you would take more time to proofread before posting. Every chapter is so full of misspellings and misused words that they were at times almost painful to read. If you're going to use the word "choke" over and over again then spell it properly. Conjugate verbs properly. Correctly writing "denounce" instead of "denunciate" and fixing endless other errors should have been possible with even one more pass (such as "belying" not "bellying").
Child abuse is a difficult subject, and you're brave to attempt it. I think the story would be stronger if it had been treated more consistently and coherently. You skip over Sango's parents' awareness and reactions for most of the story, then dismiss them with a paragraph of her wondering about it years after the fact. Too easy.
Miroku's role is, frankly, boring so far. There is nothing about him that holds the reader's interest. When he is introduced in both manga and anime, he fights on fairly equal footing with Inuyasha even without his wind tunnel. It is his wit and wisdom that guides them through the countryside and different social strata. What makes him interesting is the combination of compassionate monk and worldly lecher, but your story shows none of that so far, so one wonders what Sango would see in him.
What I like about your story is Sango's character presented as a woman of her period, not the liberated and modern woman so many fanfics present. I think making her a warrior because she failed in training as a wife puts an interesting spin on the contradiction that she presents, but I haven't been fully convinced by the reason for her failure being her experience at the hands of her uncle.
I'm also wondering what happened to take us from the cell after the battle to them traveling to meet the other survivors. Did I somehow skip a chapter? Anyway, I wish you success on continuing with the story. I'll be watching for new chapters...
| SXM132 chapter 21 . 5/16/2012
Keep going! I'm sensing a delicious love triangle, mmyes? I'd love to see this fic to the end, so I hope you find your muse and stick to it ]
| Death101- Fox Version chapter 21 . 5/15/2012
I'd say you are doing an awesome job! I really really liked the bit from Miroku's POV and Sango's reaction to seeing both the good and the bad back from the past. Please update when you are able. Also please note I started to tear up at the end of Miroku's POV.
| Otaku-SIG chapter 21 . 5/15/2012
Yes, it's been a while, I was so happy to see you updated :)
Very romantic. I loved Miroku's will to not let her go. That night scene.
And I think you are doing a good job about explaining why she doesn't want the closeness and the touch. It feels real, all those contradictory feelings.
The arrival at the village has been so shocking. That POOR Miroku, I'm dying to read what thoughts were on his mind while watching the scene. That embrace. What does his smile hide.
Waiting for more since minute one after finishing this.
Come on Muse!
| StarOfTheSeaaa chapter 20 . 12/30/2011
So good! I havent been able to stop reading your story once I started! Although I'm not one for goary stuff I put up with it to read your story! Please update soon! That's really all I can say.
| Steph the bat 11 chapter 1 . 12/8/2011
well I can tell this will be a good story!
| Boobie-Chan chapter 20 . 12/3/2011
Yay! an update! Great chapter, Im glad to see Miroku and everyone else doing wait does Sango like Akio?
| Otaku-SIG chapter 20 . 11/30/2011
Oh! I have no cookie x_x
Sango and Miroku's moment has been PRECIOUS. It almost made me cry. He can be so loving...
Waiting for more! :)
| AM78 chapter 4 . 11/29/2011
Another great chapter. I like how it focuses on Sango's inner thoughts and all the misery she's had to endure.
However, this emphisis on her not being respected for being a woman just cause she's a warrior is getting old. First of all, it's a total contradiction to the series. In the series, everyone in her village was trained as a warrior, male and female. Second of all, it's just really not that big of a deal. Remember Inuyasha's version of 16th century Japan is a fantasy world where females being warriors really isn't much of a taboo.
But even disregarding all that, it's just getting too repetative pointing it out all the time.
Still this is a very enjoyable series that I will most certainly keep reading.
| Death101- Fox Version chapter 20 . 11/27/2011
Oh boy. Just when Sango got some good news she gets some more not so good news. Brilliant. Anyways, awesome job! Please update soon!
| AM78 chapter 2 . 11/1/2011
Another good chapter. I really liked the action and the depiction of Sango. This is some of the best writing of her I've ever seen on FF.
| AM78 chapter 1 . 10/29/2011
Okay, well this is officially the darkest, most distrubing opening I've ever read of any story in my entire life.
But that's not a bad thing, because that was point. This was excellently written. I could totally picture the confusion and horror of what Sango was going through. This is a very serious topic and you gave it the proper treatment it deserved. Honestly the whole event was so well conveyed that it was actually kind of painful to read. I had to push myself to keep going. Normally that would not be good, but in this case it was because it's a testiment to how truley effective your writing is of such a disturbing event.
Only a few minor nitpicks here. One is the warning label at the start of the story. I would prefer it wasn't there. Not having it would have added in the additional element of surprise, which would have made the events even more terrifying, in a proper manner. I think the M rating is all the warning this story needs. Anything extra just gives away key story events too soon.
Also, the part about Sango's father not liking her for being a girl is a major departure from the established storyline since it wasn't in the manga or tv series. I got the exact opposite impression from watching the series and reading the manga. I can see the change serves a purpose since it provides additional reasoning for Sango to warm up to her uncle, but I'm still not sure it was necessary.
But no matter, this was a superbly written, well made opening and I'm looking forward to reading more.