Reviews for Champion
SunnyTangerine chapter 25 . 1/2/2010
i luv ur story!~ update more! plz and thx

~0ce N949
Dragon Reverb chapter 25 . 11/30/2009
HOLY SHIT! Ryoma is gay? AH! The horror! Dammit.. One is fine.. But two? AH! Ok never mind.

UPDATE!
Princess-Lazy-Chan chapter 25 . 11/30/2009
this is awesome cant wait for more

*Lazy-chan
darkninja5 chapter 24 . 11/9/2009
love the story, it's awesome, cute, funny, and HOT...lol, u should change the rating to M and add some lemons, there were potential opportunities for some...sad there wasn't, but your the author and an update would suit just fine as well _
Dragon Reverb chapter 22 . 10/11/2009
UPDATE!
AquaJet chapter 22 . 10/6/2009
Are you implying that it's me for "I wanted to point out that some of you don’t pay attention. (it’s slightly annoying) The way I write is that I put little hints that give you clues as to why characters say certain things or act certain ways. And it’s minuscule things like something they or someone else might have muttered. Or a look they may have given someone else."

Cuz, I don't see anyone else make reviews as long as mine. They just ask for an update.

QuEsTiOn tImE:

1) How does Rayah percieve herself?

2) Was there really any need to have Rayah's mom be a complete douche other than be used as a plot device?

And, I would ask more but they have to do with plot, characterization, etc and that's too long (plus, I'd have to reread every single chap 0.o)

update when you can~
Dragon Reverb chapter 21 . 10/5/2009
LOl... UPDATE!
AquaJet chapter 21 . 10/4/2009
OH MAN! I have something to say again. le gasp O

Contructive critisim:

1) Have you really done research on Jackal on whether or not he's black or brazilian with a tan? Cause I honestly don't know either. I just wanted to make sure you know.

2) WHY WHY WHY and WHY must you imply that Tezuka and Rayah did 'it' already. We really don't have to know unless it somehow prevents Rayah from winning her match. Cause when a girl sleeps with a man for the first time, the next morning, the girl might not even move depending on how intense it was. You implied that Tezuka was gentle so I think Rayah manages well especially when she was practicing with Kaido (I mean...she left a bruise. I think she's fine)

3) What's up with Rayah when she's facing with Kaido? It's like she's PMSing 0.o there's really no reason why she's acting that way...unless I missed a Tezuka x Rayah fight

4) I don't get the ending of the chap. Do Fuji and Yuki know about Rayah and Tezuka already?

5) there are errors in there (grammar/spelling). I'm not going to be specific unless you want me to.

Comments:

1) OMGZ Jackal: Black or Brazillian with a tan? XD

2) Aw...that was my muffin XD

3) Tezuka thinking about the 'passionate' night with Rayah...? WOW XD

4) cute moments: Tezuka blushing/Rayah blushing :3

Why do I always give you such long reviews when I come back from the "dead"? XD
princeoftenniesfangirl chapter 20 . 10/4/2009
Please write another chapter soon. I really like this story.
Oturan Ikamuzu 1 chapter 20 . 9/27/2009
UPDATE.
Dragon Reverb chapter 20 . 9/24/2009
Nice.. UPDATE!
AquaJet chapter 20 . 9/23/2009
I don' think I reviewed in a while...but anyway.

Contructive Critisim:

Tezuka and Fuji were OOC. (I believe the tensai keeps hs guard up like Tezka and always shows a smile - sadistic or not). Tezuka would probably stop the strip poker (and it is an american game so it does't really fit in here but Rayah and Echizen have been in america so that's kind of minor thing). Uh...Rayah has had a major change - almost unbelievable to me - but I don't know why she's stressing over graduating cause I thought she wouldn't care.

And Tezuka suddenly going sort of romantic at the end just make me freak out as well as laugh.

Comments:

Yeah, sorry if the review sounds mean in any way. Right now, I'm trying to improve my writing skills by looking at other people's works and try to find errors (in plot, charater, spelling/grammar, etc)

But anyway, my favorite part was when Tezuka's boxer's *nosebleed* was revealed. WOW green with tennis ball prints! (I always thought it would be somethng like traditional, plain boxers) Oh and let's not forget Yukimura's pink with giraffe prints XD

This is my longest review ever O.O

Bye~ :3
Dragon Reverb chapter 19 . 9/2/2009
o.0... STRIP POKER! Lols.. UPDATE!
Masquerade Madness chapter 19 . 9/1/2009
Rofl.

I can't wait for the strip poker.
Dragon Reverb chapter 18 . 8/14/2009
you go girl! LOl, UPDATE!
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