|Reviews for Once in a Lifetime|
| yaslanagirl chapter 13 . 10/14
i like that the pacing has sped up a bit in the past few chapters (as far as giving answers and letting up on the suspense) - but i didn't really like this chapter very much. it seemed pretty bland in comparison to the others, mostly (i believe) because it was just Jir recounting the events of the movies. I'm not sure how it could have been improved, but this one just really fell flat for me.
I liked the beginning and ending bits where actual dialogue and story progression was taking place, though. and I'm pretty sure the lady who travelled back in time is the Admiral's wife. I guess that's why she looked so sad when she sought him out in that bar (The Jedi and Senator) all those years ago. I'm curious to learn more about her, and what subject she's a theorist in, as well!
| yaslanagirl chapter 10 . 10/14
are the two realities merging? Is Jir the source of the unravelling tapestry? The original time-traveller that made the diversion and the subequent melding (when the separation couldn't be supported by the fabric of time? was there a paradox?)?
i like that, as time progresses, more and more people are experiencing double-memories _
| yaslanagirl chapter 9 . 10/14
I now have so many more questions! XD I'm sure you'll reveal the answers to these as you did for the previous ones.
I'm getting steadily more and more concerned about Anakin's state. It appears as though there's some pretty severe bleed-over effect (and now it looks like Ahsoka is also being affected by it! Oh no!) which is causing some traumatic effects. I'm a ball of nerves!
I'm gonna need a nice relaxing bit here soon, dunno how much longer I can manage to withstand the constant suspense and steadily increasing tension. I know I was only just applauding your pacing, but there seems to be no end in sight for my nerves. I love mystery stories (raised on Nancy Drew novels, and the like), so I'm here for the long haul - of course. I can't deprive my curiosity, i just hope it remains an enjoyable experience to read.
| yaslanagirl chapter 8 . 10/14
waaaiiit... does this mean that the Admiral Jerrison who died was the Admiral Jerrison from a different set of events? Like, Mik(a) was 'native' to this version of events (the version that came about due to an alteration from canon events), and Mik(b) came from the other version of events (the version unchanged from canon)? My guess is that Mik(a) was killed by some kind of ghostly presence of Darth Vader on the bridge just before Mik(b) appeared and effectively took his place.
I guess that means there's more than one person who got caught in the time-travel (vortex maybe?) incident, though some of them are dead now (not to mention the strange battleground and AT-AT remains).
This is all quite complex and fascinating! You've got me thinking really hard (and reviewing a lot, which... pretty much never happens :P) - I love it! stories like this are my favorites, plus its a time-travel, and it looks like it's a fix-it (from a new perspective), which make it even better! Many kudos to you!
| yaslanagirl chapter 6 . 10/14
i feel like the jedi council in this, lol XD one answer comes up and two questions arise to replace the last. _ you would write a very tightly-wrapped mystery story, i think, and do it well.
One complaint on form: I wish that you would separate your dialogue. It's occasionally very difficult to tell who is speaking, especially when there are several people's dialogue occupying the same paragraph. It is customary to give each new line of dialogue a new paragraph, and trying to follow your different method (which doesn't have much of a discernible pattern) is very challenging. It's not enough to make me dislike the story, or stop reading, but it -does- repeatedly knock me out of the smooth immersion a good storytelling session achieves.
Aside from your dialogue format, your story does very well in pacing and achieving that smooth immersion, and I really like the narrator's voice. Thus, I find it more and more disappointing to be faced with such a small (and easily avoided) sticking point. I don't know if anybody else has mentioned it, but on the off chance (and to keep my conscience as a Literature Major clear) I felt compelled to include this note.
I don't expect you come back and rewrite this story so far after its completion (that would be unfair of me). However, I did want to give you fair warning for all your future wonderful works, which I have all faith that they will be. _
| yaslanagirl chapter 5 . 10/14
Does this mean that more than one person went back in time? Who is the Admiral's Wife? DX
| yaslanagirl chapter 3 . 10/14
i finally think i have a handle of what's going on here, and (now that I'm no longer terribly confused) I think it's brilliant! this is a unique approach to the time-travel trope and it's actually really interesting. I was a bit discouraged during chapters 1 and 2 because i was very lost and couldn't figure out anything (and not being able to adequately parse the data severely diminishes enjoyment). I am glad, now, to say I am looking forward to watching how the echoes and ripples of this time-travel incident propagate across the galaxy! I'll also put in my guess here as Vader being the traveler in question. Though, i'm also eager to find out the circumstances of the traveler's departure from their initial place in time. :3
| EmlynMara chapter 18 . 8/28/2015
Incredible story. I can't even begin to imagine how you juggled everything. Heartbreakingly sad. I feel stunned and shocked and don't know what else to say.
| Guest chapter 1 . 11/29/2014
-19 el vivo 3 el muerto
| pronker chapter 18 . 10/6/2012
Very interesting premise - I enjoyed the multiple characters in this - perhaps ffn did the story an injustice when the formatting did not allow for each speaker to have his or her own paragraph, but sometimes the formatting for this site does skew when uploading. Anyway, congratulations on completing your story!
| aurebesh chapter 18 . 6/11/2012
Okay... so, when they get back from the portal, the real timeline is the SCREWED one like in the Original Trilogy? What? WHY? The Leia-Jedi AU is better :(
But... excellent fic. I mean it.
| aurebesh chapter 17 . 6/11/2012
Wow, wow, wow. I'm speechless. Favoriting!
| FirePhoenix97 chapter 1 . 11/29/2011
RABBITS ARE INTELLIGENT!
| ILDV chapter 18 . 9/22/2010
| T chapter 16 . 7/29/2010
I think that the people who messed up the GOOD timeline and made the changes with Anakin unable to breathe on his own, etc. should be the ones to travel back and fix what they did.